Sometimes I can’t help but feel that it’s all a cruel joke.
One designed to bring those of us who have been holding back down to a new level of humble.
Those of us who grew up in a patriarchal society and who diligently put on our big girl panties, our shoulder-padded jackets, our power suites to climb the ladder to social success.
Those of us who devoured books for information, always having the facts at our fingertips in the boardroom so we could hold our own.
Those of us who bravely followed in our mothers footsteps – a generation determined to prove that women can do it all. Be the perfect mother baking cookies for the school fete. Be the perfect wife who has dinner on the table in time when her man arrived home, pouring his beer and giving him quick sex to help with his stress and then get up to go do the dishes, the washing and pack everyones lunch for tomorrow. Be the corporate ball crusher who would arrive at the office first and often be the last to leave. Doing everything to perfection. Not asking for help as that would be a sign of weakness. Never breaking down in public as that would make you an easy target for those eagerly waiting to step on you.
And they did!
The moment you faltered.
Sadly also, mostly those who stepped on you in your attempt at recognition and approval , were your so called sisters.
They were the first to kick you out of the tribe.
To gossip in the corner giving you insulting glares.
Honestly, you couldn’t win.
But you fought the fight Sister, and for just a moment in time, you were flying high!
Finally receiving the recognition you felt you deserved.
Even though you were desperately unhappy inside.
Even though you always felt that you had to do more, no matter how exhausted you were, because if you can just do a little bit more you will finally earn their love and respect.
And you would use the busyness to keep you from feeling because that would feel like shit.
Oh those were the days my friend.
When we wore misery like medals of honour.
And then, the fucking rules changed!
All of a sudden women started wearing dresses, heels and have long locks.
They were singing and swaying their hips with abandon.
They were leaving the men who treated them like slave-girls and started demanding kings by their side.
We started hearing about the queen mentality.
That delegation was not only an art, but our birthright.
That we didn’t have to DO anything more, because we are enough.
We had to stop looking for the answers in books and had to get quiet to find the wisdom within.
We had to release and trust and co-create.
In all honesty, when I first started coming across this phenomenon I spiralled down so fast I was puking from the dizzying momentum.
I raged in horror as I had no idea how to BE!
I felt like a complete and utter fucking failure because I couldn’t understand how to trust myself when I had clearly screwed up so often in the past.
It was the worst thing that could possibly have happened to this born tomboy who competed against men for the fun of it.
I hit rock bottom.
To make it even worse, other women seemed to do it so effortlessly.
As if it’s the most natural thing in the world.
They didn’t even have one drop of perspiration and they looked completely relaxed and energised and as if, dare I say it, they were happy!!
At which point I had to make my next choice.
I could be really stubborn and prove them all wrong.
Because I’m a goddamned IronMan. I can do anything I set my mind to.
Or I could get really curious and open to explore this new breed of women who insisted on being.
My very first lesson was that this was not something that I could learn from reading books.
It’s not a course I could take but I journey I had to walk.
A journey which requires strong mentors who can bring to life that which has always been inside of me.
Mentors who had so much compassionate understanding for the fact that I had generations of programming to undo before I could ever trust myself enough to breathe into my power.
It is a slow journey – very slow.
And it’s one I will be on for the rest of my life.
Because you can’t rush the blossoming of a rose.
And if you force it, you will break it.
But darling, it’s just so delicious.
The slow awakening whereby I now go to my source for guidance.
Where my weapons of choice are my journal and pen.
Where I move my body with so much joy and freedom, awakening the blood flow, the soul flow, the creative flow.
Where I know that I am truly responsible for all that I create and this creation comes from within, not from outside of me.
All of this is available for you too.
Even when it feels frustrating and depleting and every fibre in your being is kicking and screaming in defiance.
You know it is.
Otherwise you wouldn’t be reading this.
And whether you are male or female, you know that things are changing rapidly, and if you’re determined to thrive, you have to start thinking differently, being differently.
So here’s my top three tips if you are ready to surf the wave of change:
1. Work with a mentor and coach. I’m serious Darling – you can’t learn this shit. You have to experience it. The right mentor and coach will hold that space for you to explore. To curse and rant and then go deeper. They will guide you in the most powerful techniques to connect with your wisdom.
2. Surround yourself with like-minded people who are on a similar journey. Personal thrive can be a lonely journey if you stick with the same people you’ve been with for the past four decades. You will be changing and this will either inspire others or highlight their inflexibility making them lash out at you. You truly want to surround yourself with your brothers and sisters who gets you. Who also fumble along the way. Those who will support you with empathy rather than sympathy. Those who will truly celebrate your success. Those who will never shun you or shame you.
3. Start celebrating more in your life! Celebration brings about so much joy in your body and when your vibration goes up, so does everything else. I know we’re constantly told to focus on gratitude and this is indeed part of my daily routine, however celebration lights me up to the next level. And once you start celebrating on a daily basis, you open yourself up to understand just how abundant you are and how much you have available to you right now. Plus, who doesn’t like putting on their favourite song and just dancing with wild abandon??
You’ve been hard on yourself for long enough my friend.
It’s time for you to stop fighting the tide, to release yourself and take the leap.
The leap to your power.
The leap to your happiness.
For only death is inevitable.
Thriving truly is a choice.
PS: It is such a privilege for me to walk this journey with some of the most inspirational people in the world.
Those who know they were born to lead. Those who were born to bring change. Those who were born to heal and create.
It’s not always the easiest of journeys.
I challenge you to your very core.
I break down your barriers.
I smash your glass ceilings.
Because I believe you’re worth it.
If you’re ready to experience this level of challenge, this level of accountability, this level of empowerment, claim your consultation today and test the waters.