You THINK not enough time is the problem, but it’s not.

The number one complaint I hear, especially from women,

the number one reason they can’t get their dreams off the ground,

the number one obstacle they just don’t seem to get over so they can focus on themselves,

is time.

There’s never enough hours in the day.

At night they look back, exhausted, frustrated, slightly resentful,

and see a myriad of busyness,

everyone else being taken care of,

their desires still sitting at the bottom of the pile.

Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

Maybe tomorrow nobody will phone unexpectedly or drop in without invitation.

Maybe tomorrow they’ll finally figure out how to keep everyone else in tip top shape and carve out 30 minutes for themselves.

Except, we both know it’s never going to happen.

Because time is not the problem.

It never is.

The real hurdle is understanding that you’re not a motherloving slave girl.

You’re not here to take care of everybody else whilst running on empty.

I’m not sure who put you at the end of the line, begging ‘Please sir, can I have more?’

But I can tell you this with certainty,

it’s YOU keeping yourself there.

The stories you have running on repeat in your subconscious mind.

The labels you so desperately cling to – “I am a people-pleaser, I can’t help myself.”

Puh-lease.

Until you get to the point of valuing yourself above all,

until you decide that you are the most important person in YOUR life,

until you give yourself permission to thrive,

you will always settle for crumbs.

Each sex has their own social conditioning to deal with during this time of change.

For men, it’s that life is not about paying bills at the neglect of relationships.

For women, it’s that they’re not responsible for everyone else at the cost of their own happiness.

Self-love.

Self-worth.

Boundaries.

Choosing thrive.

THIS is at the core of your time dilemma.

That’s right Sunshine

It’s time for a revolution of selfishness!

By becoming selfish we draw a line in the sand and declare to the Universe that nothing is more important than our happiness.

Happiness, which comes from deep connection with our higher selves.

Happiness, which comes from excellent health and vitality.

Happiness, which comes from doing the work that lights us up like a Christmas tree.

Happiness, which comes from expressing our art in our unique way.

Happiness, which comes from fulfilling relationships, no codependency, but a meeting of equal souls having fun.

That means YOU come first.

Every single day.

YOUR spiritual and mindset practice.

YOUR physical training.

YOUR art.

YOU

YOU

YOU.

And then, from this space of fulfilment and joy, you share yourself with those who choose to be on the same vibration.

Including your kids.

Why are so many kids struggling with anxiety, depression, rogue behaviour?

Because the adults are running around like headless chickens, miserable, drugged, zoned out, desperately trying to escape real life.

You seriously think your shit isn’t impacting your kids?

Stop trying to fix your kids and start taking care of yourself!

This is challenging at a time when majority of humanity still haven’t received the memo.

That you’re not responsible for their happiness.

That they need to wipe their own asses.

That you’re not their therapist, their nurse maid, their secretary, their postman, their cleaner, their cook, their punching bag.

Which means, when you finally look in the mirror and say “YOU are the most important person in my world

people will be shocked to the core.

They will lash out.

HOW DARE YOU BE SO FUCKING SELFISH?

Who do you think you are to not be there for them?

When fury no longer works they will start pleading – pulling on your heart-string.

PLEASE – I NEED YOU!

I can’t do this without you.

Don’t abandon me.

The pendulum will keep swinging…

Back to anger.

FINE – THEN FUCK OFF.

The entire time, you will sit there, having to choose

again and again

Happiness

or

Sacrifice of self.

It’s been my experience that sacrificing myself not only led to a horrible existence,

where death seemed more pleasant than breathing,

but actually,

nobody who said they loved me truly gave a shit about me.

In all fairness, how can anyone be capable of love if they don’t love themselves?

They merely used me as a scapegoat for their unwillingness to take care of themselves.

Emotionally.

Spiritually.

Physically.

Their lives kept going on the path they chose UNCONSCIOUSLY, and my sacrifice didn’t make a drop of difference.

For transformation to occur you will have to take full responsibility for the fact that you’ve trained people how to treat you.

A big motherfucking pill to swallow!

Decades of showing up in a certain way now needs to be changed.

And it’s tough.

Because your will is still in the beginning stages of this process, which means it hasn’t matured to full strength yet.

The temptation to give in,

to relent,

to just go back to the way things were,

will be powerful.

You have to choose daily.

Keeping your eyes on the prize.

The prize which is

YOUR THRIVE.

YOUR HAPPINESS.

YOU BEING THE BEST VERSION OF YOU.

YOU FEELING FULFILLED.

Nothing is more beautiful, more radiant, more inspiring, than a man or woman who have found the courage to fall in love with themselves.

Those who honour their purpose and ensure they are perfectly supported to live in their zone of genius.

Those who create from a space of connection to Source.

Those who love from a place of overflow.

These are the modern day warriors willing to fight for change.

As I sat journaling this morning I connected to purpose.

I connected to a previously hidden truth.

The words that flowed from my pen

“The goal was never to be liked.  What I actually really want and DO want most of all is to make an impact in people’s lives.  To empower them to transform through conscious choice and a belief in self.”

That’s right my friend,

after decades of doing personal development work

I’ve still been holding back due to a desire to be liked.

I still get triggered when YouTube user pokenpo comments that ‘tattoos are ugly unless they are very small tattoos’

And I could go into hiding,

I could cover up my gorgeous tattoos,

I could kiss ass,

I could once again put their opinion before my art, my work, my personal taste,

but I won’t.

At some point I decided to care so much about the message that I would stop giving a fuck about the haters.

I put myself first.

Every single day.

Filling up my cup.

With love.

Letting it spill over.

From this space it’s not up to me who is open to receive,

and who is closed off.

Most people from years before have chosen to leave my side – finding my insistence on self love unacceptable.

Not understanding my unwillingness to drop everything each time they felt their agenda, their life, their demands, should take priority over mine.

Not liking the fact that I let them stand on their own two feet from a place of believing we are equal in strength.

I completely respect their choice and wish them nothing but happiness.

I’m simply no longer willing to sacrifice my joy for anyone else.

I finally understand that nothing you do or say can make others happy.

Happiness comes from within.

Which means the only person you CAN make happy, is yourself.

By choosing to be happy and doing more of the things that make you happy.

That means, I now cook when I’m already feeling happy at the end of the day having taken care of myself, my desires, my art, and then I infuse the meal with love and joy and share this with my family.

And not every night either.

I want to share in the joy and happiness of my boys and so they have their turn in cooking for the family.

THIS is a wondrous coming together of love.

It all starts with YOU.

Take back your life.

Take back your happiness.

Question the stereotypical behaviours you were raised with.

Question the labels you’ve so readily pinned on yourself.

Only death is inevitable.

Thriving is always the choice of the brave.

You know I love you,

or maybe you don’t,

Anel

PS:  IT’S HERE!!!

Foundation

– SUPPORTING WOMEN ENTREPRENEURS TO MAKE MONEY AND CREATE FREEDOM IN THEIR LIVES THROUGH SUCCESS MINDSET AND IMPLEMENTATION OF STRUCTURES THAT TAKES YOU FROM ZERO TO 5-FIGURES

Come with us on a 3 month journey where like-minded women are taking a stand for their happiness which includes freedom of money, freedom of time, freedom of choice.

We kick off July 24 with a month of mindset work followed by the foundational structures, systems and strategies that will have you increase revenue whilst opening you up for more freedom of time, creativity and self-care.

I created this program especially for women who know they are here to create something spectacular, but they’re done with the overwhelm and trying to keep up with those who are already at 6-figures.

Truth is that when you’re starting out or not yet making multi-5 figure income, you need a different mindset, you need the basics on which to build, you need to understand and LIVE the five foundational pillars of business first.

This is NOT for those who just want to learn.

It’s for the implementers.

Those who show up every day, making themselves a priority so that by the end of the 90 days they have more cash in the bank.

First ten spaces receive a 1/3 discount as the Universe always rewards fast action.  Spaces will go fast!

Read about it here and if you have any questions, message me at anel@anelbester.com