When last have you made your yes, YOUR yes?

Two of our most POWERFUL words,

the ones opening and closing doors,

the ones that has us expanding or constricting,

is:

yes

and

no.

It’s because of the power they have over our experience of life, that those who live in fear, those who feel they have to dominate and oppress others so they won’t have to face their puny egos in the mirror, train us to say YES to them, and NO to ourselves.

Even when saying yes to them, feels like vomit washing around in your mouth.

Even when saying no to yourself, feels like a nail being driven into your very core.

They demand you respect them.

They demand you regurgitate their truth without question.

They demand you live for them not yourself.

They demand you comply by their rules or be expelled.

They command you to be ‘responsible’, taking care of your body not to thrive, but to serve.

They rape you into releasing your personal right to say no to that which does not please you.

And slowly but surely,

you constrict by saying yes to their bullshit,

and no to your truth.

Your voice becomes an instrument of compliance and obedience,

instead of an instrument for creative change.

I clearly recall the suffocation.

For as long as I can remember, nothing made sense to me.

Family rules didn’t make sense to me.

Why did I have to respect those whose behaviour left me feeling ill just because they were older than me?

Why couldn’t I talk about what was happening behind closed doors?

Why couldn’t I talk about the physical punishment if it really hurt them more than me?

Why couldn’t I talk about the hurtful words if those words was truly the voice of love?

Why couldn’t I talk about my crazy father threatening to shoot my mom in front of me on Christmas Eve if this was what marriage looks like?

Money rules didn’t make sense to me.

Why couldn’t I be involved in budget talks?

Why couldn’t I tell my friends how amazing my mom is that she would bake cookies from scratch when there wasn’t any money for store-bought packets?

Why couldn’t we celebrate the fact that we were middle-class?

The church rules didn’t make sense to me.

Why couldn’t everyone pray in a way that feels delightful?

Why couldn’t I talk to God directly?

Why did I have to buy my way into heaven with my ten cents into the collection plate?

Why did we have to be right and everyone else doomed to burn in the fires of hell for all eternity, because they called God by a different name, prayed in a different fashion?

More than anything, how the fuck do we murder in the name of God when she is LOVE?

All the time, told to hang my head in shame for my defiance:

‘Yes father,

Yes mother,

Yes sir,

Yes ma’am,

I’m sorry.

I won’t ask again.

I won’t do that again.

I won’t say anything again.’

Feeling my soul shrivel up into a dried up ball of defeat.

I still see it happening everywhere, and I know people aren’t doing it maliciously.

In all honesty they’re simply too fucking exhausted and lazy to think for themselves.

Desperately holding on to traditions that has never served the individual, because the alternative would mean that they would have to take responsibility for themselves!

Their thoughts.

Their feelings.

Their words.

Their actions.

They would have to take the time to remember who they truly are and what they desire.

Do you even know what you truly desire?

Do you have a burning desire right here, right now?

They would have to grow a pair and strong boundaries and actually have the audacity to say NO to people who don’t respect them, who don’t appreciate them, who don’t love them.

Can you imagine??

They would have to start believing in themselves, and say YES to what they truly want, and then go for it as if their hair is on fire.

Without figuring out the how.

Taking a leap of faith.

Believing that even if they fell flat on their faces, they can get back up again.

They would have to make their yes THEIR yes, and their no THEIR no.

From within.

From soul.

Not from outside authorities.

Not from compliance.

If this thought has you reeling out in a breakout of sweat-induced fear,

if you want to rally against the mere idea of this,

telling me that this selfish perspective will result in social chaos,

I invite you to press pause and ask yourself,

is this thought coming from a space of fear,

or a space of love?

Do you honestly believe that people are good,

or do you think them evil little motherfuckers?

Because if you think the latter, I’m sorry to tell you that oppression will simply cause more of the dark energy to grow.

If on the other hand, like me, you believe in love,

that people are love at their essence,

that humanity is love at its essence,

that the Universe is love,

then you will come to see that radical self-love is the cure to all the shit you see going on around you right now.

Radical self-love is the cure to rape.

Radical self-love is the cure to murder.

Radical self-love is the cure to depression.

Radical self-love is the cure to suicide.

Radical self-love is the cure to anxiety.

Radical self-love is the cure to overwhelm.

Radical self-love is the cure to shame.

Radical self-love is the cure to abuse.

And when you are filled with radical self-love, you can ONLY radiate love.

By saying yes to your soul desires,

and no to their bullshit.

I’m just going to leave you with this to ponder on.

After all,

only death is inevitable.

Thriving is the choice of those brave enough to question and think for themselves.

With unending love and appreciation for you,

Anel

 

 

Stating a case for discipline…

I’ve been intrigued by the increase of coaches who are slamming the concept of discipline.

Highly successful leaders who I personally follow and respect.

More importantly, I’m watching the effect this has on those who mindlessly absorb everything they say,

adjusting their own behaviour accordingly,

and getting matching results.

Results which smacks of failure.

Leading to frustration.

And to a large extend more people hanging their heads in defeat.

Thinking that once again, they’re just not getting it.

Which must mean there’s something wrong with them.

They must be lesser beings.

What saddens me is the fact that most people are so busy that they’re not taking the time to sit back and take in the bigger picture.

Missing out the context.

The truth is that when you closely study these individuals,

they’re disciplined AF!

They are typically high achievers who have trained certain critical behaviours to the point where it’s automatic, and they no longer have to consciously think about it.

Thereby creating a life that feels easy and in flow.

Action no longer feels like the original effort.

And then they use the language that’s now aligned for where they are,

forgetting how they got to this point in time.

They forget that when you’ve spent a life-time not working your mind because you fell into the trap of unquestioned obedience,

when your body is poisoned, fat, exhausted, dehydrated,

when you’re building a new business from scratch,

discipline is the EXACT thing that is required to shift your arse from where you are to where you desire to be!

When the muscle is weak from not being used,

it takes effort to discipline your thoughts,

it takes effort and discipline to increase your water intake,

it takes effort and discipline to deepen your breath,

it takes effort and discipline to create a habit of daily meditation,

it takes effort and discipline to remove the resistance to your thrive,

it takes effort and discipline to create your art every single day.

Fuck,

it takes discipline to build in recovery to ensure longevity and endurance.

I’m not making these coaches wrong in any way, and I get that what they’re preaching is the fact that we are not required to work ourselves to death in order for us to receive success, abundance, joy and love!

Not the way our parents told us –

That all it takes is hard work;

That happiness is to be found in a big bank balance;

That you have to be miserable, sacrifice, put thrive on hold,

just to pay the rent.

I get that.

But please don’t throw the baby out with the bath water.

I’m all for creating an epic life where your delicious arse is on fire with passion and purpose, adventure and excellence.

It takes an enchanting vision,

an avatar you can easily step into,

and aligned action daily.

It takes the discipline to step into this way of living until this way becomes your new normal.

And people look at you and wonder how the fuck you do it all…

Understanding as well that as you continue to rise,

your desires will increase,

and you will continue to do the work.

The real work.

The mind-set work.

The soul-work.

It will feel so natural that you take it for granted and say it’s so easy, so effortless, that you don’t need to be disciplined to live this way.

I’ve come to realise that one of my soul-gifts is the gift of remembering.

All of it.

I never disconnect from the steps I took to get me to where I am.

I choose not to forget the pain, heartache, desperation, frustration, defeat, screaming my defiance to Creator when I was broken on the floor, yet refusing to throw in the towel.

I choose to remember.

All of it.

To stay connected to my pain.

For every tear I’ve ever spilt is in service to another.

It is in my remembering that I serve as a bridge.

This is why I’m able to keep it real for my clients.

Yes, I absolutely can share with them the new ways of doing, of being, of collapsing the manifestation of their dreams.

But I’m never going to tell them they don’t need discipline,

that they don’t have to take action,

that no work is required.

Ain’t going to happen.

Because I know that without the foundation, your castle will always come crumbling down before you’re halfway there.

My invitation to you today is to pay closer attention.

Where have you been listening to contrasting advise,

words that felt completely wrong,

ignoring the uneasy feeling in your crop,

and then not getting results?

Where have you stopped questioning, stopped looking at the bigger picture, stopped taking the time to evaluate the context?

And what impact is this having on your life?

I believe that right now, our world is filled with wisdom.

But wisdom without discretion is a dangerous thing my friend.

My criteria is to remain open to learning,

to feel what is aligned for me and retain that as building blocks for my next level,

and lovingly release the rest.

Without having to make it wrong.

Everything is right for someone.

It’s just not always right for me.

You’re wiser than you know Darling.

Time to start trusting yourself.

Only death is inevitable.

Thriving is always the choice of the brave.

With love, appreciation and respect,

Anel

 

 

 

 

The hardest part is watching them die…

The day I decided to step out of the way and allow people to have their own experience, was one of the hardest ever.

The levels of frustration,

anger,

hurt,

is indescribable.

Yet that is part of the deal in coming to this life.

To mind my own business.

My responsibility is to continuously focus on myself, my resistance, my self-sabotage, my fears, my growth, my pain, my joy, my health, my art.

That’s it.

And as a coach, I get to share my journey with you with the sole intention of providing an image of possibility.

I simply get to share with you what I do, the results I receive, and the impact it has on my thrive.

Or sometimes, my dive LOL.

What you do with this, is up to you.

What used to really fuck me up in all of this, was the wonderful little label of ‘helper’ that is so freely attached to anyone in a healing, teaching, leadership, consulting profession.

Not from the stance of the client,

but the perspective of the coach / consultant / trainer / motivational speaker / business owner etc.

There comes an expectation that when we step into this role, it’s our RESPONSIBILITY to HELP as many people as possible.

After all, we spend years dedicating our lives to figure out some important shit.

Of how to train our bodies, our minds, our emotions, our focus, our actions, to receive our desired outcomes.

And we BELIEVE in what we do, because we FEEL the effect for ourselves.

So excited to share,

so passionate to have more people feeling FANTASTIC,

the tendency is to talk to anything that has two ears,

wanting the best for them.

Especially those who are near and dear to us.

It’s heartbreaking to live a lifestyle that has you jumping out of bed, experiencing epic adventures, high vibrational all day long, and going to bed satisfied,

only to see those around you overweight, smoking, drinking, existing, depressed, constantly complaining that they can’t do this much longer.

YET

they have no real desire to change.

What I found is the more I wanted to ‘help’ my loved ones, the more they resented me and basically told me to go to hell.

“Not everyone is like you Anel”

“Not everyone wants to be like you Anel”

And this is the truth my friend.

Well, first of all, NOBODY is like me.

I’m fucking unique.

More importantly is the fact that not everyone WANTS to be like me.

In fact, very few people do.

Most look at me and they THINK it would be great to have my lifestyle,

until they see what it entails,

and then they go running for the hills.

They think I’m bat-shit crazy, obsessed, and unnatural.

They don’t understand why I would get up at 4 am every day.

They don’t understand why I would want to train insane 7 days a week.

They don’t understand why I would want to create my art 7 days a week.

They don’t understand why I would want to take my laptop on holiday, still get up at 4 am, still train every day.

They don’t understand why I would want to eat clean, not drink, not smoke, not party, not waste my time with idle chit-chat.

They look at all of this, and they think the price is too high.

Instead, they choose to remain the same.

Complaining until the day they die,

happy in their misery.

And now, I let them have that experience for themselves.

Free choice.

I no longer try to help people.

I keep my head where it belongs – my life.

I work on myself relentlessly.

I create my art.

I share my journey.

And for those who come to me and say, “I’m fucking ready to do whatever it takes to live my dream”,

those I support.

I guide them.

I ask the hard questions that has them be more honest with themselves than they’ve ever been before.

It’s challenging AF.

We’re raised in a culture of shame – which by the way is killing people left, right and centre if you pay attention!

It’s challenging to allow yourself to trust a crazy bitch who relentlessly pick at your bullshit so you can finally come clean and admit to yourself what you TRULY DESIRE.

It’s challenging to allow yourself to be vulnerable enough to finally admit that the only person who is standing between you and EVERYTHING YOU WANT, is you.

It’s challenging to allow yourself to look and feel like an idiot whilst learning new skills and techniques to the point of elegance.

Why do you think so few people really do the work?

Which is exactly why the drive, the desire, has to come from inside my client.

THEY HAVE TO BE COMMITTED TO THEIR OWN THRIVE.

It has nothing to do with me.

Those who don’t ask for our support, don’t want to change.

It’s that simple my friend.

Stop trying to help people.

They are not the helpless, mentally weak, victims the media makes them out to be.

Within each and every person there resides a god.

Do you get that?

That every person is a god-particle,

here to have an experience.

Who are we to judge their choice of experience as good or bad?

Let them be.

Is it easy?

NOOOOOOOO!

Fuck, I’m still human.

I still go to bed crying after a day of witnessing self-induced suffering.

Do you have any idea how many people I come into contact with who say they can’t take it anymore,

that they want my help,

but they’re not prepared to get out of their story around money.

So they stay stuck.

They are more determined to prove to themselves that they’re broke, than they are to succeed.

Sounds harsh, yet this was my reality for most of my life.

Until I came to the point where support became a non-negotiable for me.

I was willing to sell my blood to get the money.

The Universe appreciated the gesture and delivered the money in a way more fun way.

But that’s it!

Not even Creator rescues people.

She meets them halfway but they have to take the first step.

Everything you desire is here RIGHT NOW,

but it’s normally a step above your head,

just outside of your view,

you have to step the fuck up to receive it.

Which means if you’re in any kind of ‘helping’ profession, you have got to stop stooping down to pick people up.

You are DISEMPOWERING them and quite frankly it’s disrespecting their power, their freedom of choice.

Instead,

stay the course.

Work on yourself every single day.

And those who truly desire results will step up to meet you where you can create results with them.

After all, death is inevitable.

Thriving is the choice of those with the balls to step up.

With love and appreciation,

Anel

 

 

 

 

 

 

I choose to be responsible only for myself, social expectations be damned.

Do you ever feel weighed down by your responsibilities?

Feeling as though it becomes too much at times…

Having you reach for that drink.

That block of chocolate.

Filling you with dread to the point where you just want to run away and NEVER come back.

I can relate.

I used to feel like that all the time.

From your perspective I was ticking all the boxes for a happy life – successful career, married to a handsome man, two children, two dogs, one cat, a hamster, red sports car, home-owner.

Tick tick tick.

Except my experience of your ‘happy life’, was a prison with the walls closing in.

In fact, once I discovered the freedom I felt on my bike, there were days where I wanted to start riding and never look back.

Social expectations felt suffocating.

Telling me that I always had to make the decisions that would make financial provision for my old days.

That I had to live a life of safety so that I could take care of my family.

That I should be more careful because it was unfair to make others worry about me whilst off on some irresponsible ride at 4 am in the streets of Joburg.

As a responsible adult, I had to put the feelings and needs of others before my own.

After all, I was a wife and mother and daughter and friend and employer and blah blah blah.

Whatever the fuck.

It took me ages to realise that this entire philosophy of others before self is causing endless unhappiness and breeds codependency.

For one thing, I believe that each and every one of us CHOSE to come to this plane of existence and have an experience – too airy fairy for you?  Stop reading my stuff.

For another, I don’t believe that we came to this life to be mindless slaves to a master called society.

I believe that we came here with a desire to remember who we truly are, to experience a vast variety of physical, emotional, mental contrasts – thereby sorting for ourselves that which feels fabulous and that which feels like shit.

And then to choose more fab, less drab.

FOR OURSELVES.

Understanding that for some fab is the marriage, the kids, the white picket fence.

And that is PERFECT.

What I’m pointing out today is that there are those of us who desire FREEDOM and CREATIVE EXPRESSION and ADVENTURE above all else and I’m choosing to take a stand for us by saying we’re not faulty, we’re different from the norm. 

I don’t believe that we are responsible for the experiences of others.

Yes, as a mother I chose to raise my children by feeding them, providing shelter for them, expanding their minds (although those who don’t agree with my thoughts say I corrupt my children and fuck up their lives by having them think beyond a box).

But there also came a point when I decided that as a mother I desired to show my children who the fuck I truly am.

I am NOT a maid.

I am NOT a slave.

I am NOT a timid little woman who kisses ass.

I am NOT a little princes who don’t want to get a splash of mud on her dress.

I couldn’t care less of having the approval of others who have conflicting values.

So I became irresponsible.

I became selfish.

I decided to stop living in a coffin with the intention of existing to old age, by which stage my body would have been completely emancipated and dried up, life-less, anyway.

I kicked that lid open, got out and started running irresponsibly, riding irresponsibly, investing irresponsibly, moving irresponsibly.

I NEVER think things through.

I see it.

I salivate.

I say HELL YES!

I commit.

I do it, trusting that it’s all perfect and OF COURSE everything happens FOR me.

Even the painful experiences.

I take full responsibility for MY happiness – and I get to define what it looks like.

I take full responsibility for MY success – and I get to define what it looks like.

I take full responsibility for MY health – and I get to define what it looks like.

I take full responsibility for MY thrive – and I damn well get to define what it looks like.

Does this make me popular with most people?

Oh hell no!

I continue to make my own choices and to leave behind those who get outraged, bitter and resentful.

Not my problem.

I have come to realise that no matter what I do, how it gets interpreted has NOTHING to do with me, and EVERYTHING to do with the story that’s going on in the other person’s head.

I also no longer blame others for the results in my life.

I don’t blame McDonalds’ for obesity.  You want to eat that shit, you’re gonna get fat.  Think for yourself.

I don’t blame successful people’s social media posts for my insecurities.  They are human too!  I respect them for their success and I happen to know that as humans we all have our fears, our doubts.  I fucking salute them for facing their demons in private so they can perform in public.

I have zero time for blame or shame – the two behaviours which gets poured over us from childhood until we’re saturated with that shit, to enforce obedience and conformity.

Now, did this happen overnight?

OMG NO!

I’m only getting started.

I’m 46 years old and happier than I’ve ever been.

Why?

Because I stopped feeling responsible for a man’s choices and his desire to be in a socially approved relationship that was suffocating both of us.

I stopped feeling responsible for my children’s socially approved successes and failures, and instead of focusing on them, I focus on myself.

I’m saying YES to my dreams, my desires, my madness,

and in this process,

I give them permission to do the same for themselves.

I adore, love and respect them for who they are.

Fucking liberating my friend.

Finally they have space to breathe, they have contrasting role models everywhere, and they get to create and experience contrasts in their lives from which to choose for themselves.

Yes, I actually believe in my kids and that they always make the perfect decisions for themselves.

Shocker, I know.

The more I focus on me, the less I focus on others.

And from this space, I make the most ‘irresponsible’ choices available to me at the time.

Yes, I’m irresponsibly choosing to be happy knowing that this is my indicator that I’m on the right path for my soul purpose.

I’m irresponsibly choosing to invest in what I desire RIGHT NOW knowing that there is no end to the amount of abundance that is available to me FOREVER.

I’m irresponsibly choosing to create and immerse myself in epic, dangerous, crazy, exhilarating, adventures that challenge body, mind and soul to the point that my guardian angels are putting in requisitions for a holiday knowing that the more I thrive, the more I inspire, which is part of my soul work.

I’m not saying that you must throw out the baby with the bathwater today Darling.

I’m simply inviting you to sit down and have an honest look at your life.

Is it feeling like the most amazing, expansive, liberating, fun adventure of all times,

or is it feeling like a death sentence?

And if so, what are the beliefs, the stories, that’s keeping you sitting on death row?

It’s all about awareness from which you can start making more conscious choices.

I’m also going to gift you this, and this will be a hard one to swallow –

You are not responsible for the happiness of others,

and they are not responsible for yours.

I know, I love you too.

Only death is inevitable.

Thriving remains the choice of the brave.

Anel

 

Your life reflects your level of mind-mastery

I was writing you this witty piece but fuck-it.

Let’s get straight to the point.

What does a life well lived look like to you?

If it’s a big party with booze and music and drunken mates, stop reading.

Walk away.

This piece isn’t for you.

If on the other hand, it’s about leaving behind a legacy, pay attention.

Your days are your life in miniature.

That’s right Darling.

EVERY SINGLE DAY COUNTS!

Which means that if you want to become legendary, each and every day has to be lived from this space.

Throw away your calendar.

The one in which society dictates what you can and can’t do in order for you to be acceptable to the masses.

Fuck the masses.

This is all about YOU,

your life,

your thrive.

I want you to start paying really good attention to your energy.

For me, there’s a combination of mind-body-soul which demands activation, challenge, nurturing and attention every single day.

When you get this right, you will NEVER again feel burnt-out.

You will NEVER again need a ‘holiday’ to recharge your batteries because you will be fully charged every single day.

But you have to get off the treadmill going nowhere.

You have to stop doing the same shit over and over again if it’s not spiralling you up.

I’m going to share with you how I see it, and then I invite you to take a look at what feels like a hell yes and how you can incorporate that into your own life, and what feels like a hell no and just let it go!  Find what works for you.

  •  Soul

I don’t believe I’m a body with a soul.  I am a soul with a body having a human experience.  My soul, she already knows exactly what I desire and how I can manifest it instantly.  She is available to me every breath of the way.  She’s figured me out a long time ago.  She knows how to get my attention, but I have to be open to receiving the signs and say FUCK YEAH before thinking about the how.

What does this look like practically?

My day starts with journaling and meditation.  There’s no single one meditation technique that I use.  I go with the flow.  Sometimes I sit with mantras.  Sometimes I stare at the warm cup of coffee in my hands and let my mind wander.  Sometimes my meditation is out on my bike.  There’s no right or wrong way in my world.

I consciously choose to stay open and I know that her guidance normally comes in the form of instant excitement!  Now let’s just be clear that when I say ‘excitement’ it’s normally dished up with a massive dose of fear.  Both has exactly the same chemical reaction in my body, might as well use them both to amplify the feeling.

I say yes, I decide it is done, and then I go to the crapper.

It’s all good.

The power of this relationship is that whenever I’m starting to sniff the possibility of overwhelm, I simply reconnect with Soul.  Wherever I am.  I just focus on my breath, slow it down, and choose to trust.

She’s never let me down.

Never will.

Have you created space to listen to the guidance of your soul?

  • Mind

For decades, I was a slave to my mind.

That’s not even accurate.

My mind was being controlled by society – filled with fear, restrictions, social expectations based on conformity and unquestioned obedience.

It was suffocating.

Like so many others, I was suffering.

I desperately tried to escape through copious amounts of alcohol, tried to become invisible by living on diet pills until there was nothing more to me than skin and bones, tried to hide behind layers of fat by eating myself into a coma, tried to escape into a different reality by watching hours and hours of television.

Finally getting to that point where death seemed like the best option.

Not even their threats of burning in hell for all eternity could stop me.

I would rather burn forever more than continue to live in excruciating pain and depression.

All based on the stories that were happening in my mind.

Victimhood, suffering, doomed to existence – these were the themes in my head.

Can you relate?

I’m one of the lucky ones.

I chose to fight back.

To reclaim my life, starting with understanding my mind.

I now know the true power of the mind.

She loves writing the story which creates my emotions which dictates my motions which ultimately creates my external reality.

And I AM her mistress.

I get to decide.

I get to write the story.

And if the story doesn’t please me, if it doesn’t empower me, if it’s not from the space of love, I get to change it.

Mindset work starts with journaling every single day.

An hour at least.

Seven days a week.

It’s THAT important.

Mindset work continuous by feeding her.

So I nourish her with books, with new insights, new knowledge, always questioning.

I allow her to create challenges in my life and turn them into projects.

Mind thrives when she gets to solve a puzzle.

So instead of wishing for an easy time, wish for an adventurous time.

This is what will keep your mind sharp, keep you focused, and ultimately spiral you up.

Where in your life are you creating opportunities for mind-gym?

Have to grow that muscle as the only alternative is atrophy Darling.

Are you feeling brain-dead?

  • Body

The body is the vehicle of that powerful soul and brilliant mind of yours.

Which means that if you desire to live an iconic life where your soul puts you in front of epic adventures, your mind is stimulated and always craving more challenge, your body best be in peak condition.

You were not made to sit on your arse all day.

When you start treating your body with respect – fuelling her like a Bentley, training her like a beast, pampering her like a queen, pleasuring her like a goddess – she will ASTOUND you with her potential!

Which is exactly why the masses feed you that white shit that has you addicted out of your mind.  It’s why they have created a diet that is literally poisoning you.  Which is why they keep you distracted as much as possible so that you are exhausted all the time.

My body is the key that unlocks my soul-mind potential.

I’ve also come to understand that as a high achiever, I am competitive to the bone.

Why not use that to my advantage instead of feeling shame as they want me to?

I channel my competitive nature into sport.

I also experience a massive transformation when entering races way above my current abilities and then having to commit, train, eat, sleep for success.

My days become even more productive and creative.

My business becomes even more impactful and inspirational to others.

My mind becomes even more clear.

I have to lean on my soul for strength even more.

Regardless of whether I race or not, I train seven days a week.

Racing takes it next level.

Understanding as well that I don’t train like a moron.

I train with a well designed plan.

I take into account my A, B and C races.

I take into account the necessity for strength AND flexibility.

Power AND endurance.

On my ‘rest’ day I do yin yoga for deep conditioning.

How are you treating and training your body?  Are you still leaving her as an after-thought?  Are you letting her go through the motions without challenging her?  Without building her?

Understand that ALL of this, this way of life, is underpinned by my commitment to thrive.

It’s lit up by excitement and purpose and my deep desire to make a difference.

I’m dedicated to impacting at least one life every single day.

In whatever form or way.

Because my days are my life in miniatures.

And that’s all there is to it.

If you’re still just trying to get through the week, fucking STOP IT!

Do you not realise that your life is a gift?

Do you not realise that you DON’T know your expiration day and every day you’re NOT showing up FULLY, is a day wasted?

What

the

fuck?

Take this piece as an opportunity to sit down, do some deep introspection, and commit to creating a life consciously.

If you want to create an average life filled with distraction and suffering, I applaud you for doing it consciously.

If on the other hand you want more, if you want legendary, decide exactly what THAT is going to look like.

From your soul

to your mind

to your body.

And then,

show up EVERY SINGLE DAY.

Only death is inevitable,

thriving is the choice of those brave enough to defy the machine.

With love and appreciation,

Anel

 

Is it true that our goals start holding us back in life?

‘Is it true that our goals start holding us back in life?’

This was an actual question asked by an actual human being.

Astounding.

Todays piece is not for you if you want to continue setting ‘safe’ goals.

It’s not for you if you want to defend the choices which has you asking bullshit questions such as the one above.

It’s definitely NOT for you if you want to just have enough, do enough, to pay the bills, to get to the end of the year holiday, and do it all again next year.

I’m not talking to you.

Instead,

I’m only talking to the hungry.

Those who have been sitting in the classroom of life, learning the hard-knocks, enduring the internal struggle between what they TRULY desire, and what they think they’re allowed to have.

I BELIEVE in goals!

They continue to drive my arse.

They continue to transform me, my life, my purpose.

That doesn’t come from setting mediocre goals my friend.

In fact,

I CHOKE on mediocrity.

Every time I get caught up in the ridiculous ‘truth’ of others of what is and is not possible for me, what is and is not responsible of me, I feel my soul shrink up and die!

FUCK THAT SHIT!

The goals that has me breaking out in a cold sweat,

the ones that has me trembling with adrenaline pumping through my veins,

tears secretly forming on the inside the only visible sign of my true fear,

these are the ONLY goals I commit to.

They are the ones where I say YES before thinking it through.

Because they are directly from my soul.

She knows…

She knows where I need to grow.

She knows where I’m not showing up in my full capacity.

She knows where I am squatting under a glass ceiling manufactured by my mind and it’s time to smash it to smithereens.

And she knows EXACTLY when it’s time.

When I’m dragging my feet at a slower pace.

Going through the motions, but lacking the emotive drive behind my actions.

Let’s just be very clear that goals has NOTHING to do with ticking boxes.

It’s not about crossing the finish line so others can applaud you.

It’s not about the little children.

The goals that I refer to, the ones I set, they’re PERSONAL.

They are only about growth.

Everything else, is simply trimmings.

How on earth can these goals EVER start holding you back in life?

So here’s some of my personal criteria for my goals.

Some will resonate.

Some will trigger.

What you do with it is up to you my friend.

All I’m saying is time is running out for all of us.

We’re not born with an expiration date tattooed on the bottom of our feet.

So why the hell are we holding back?

 1.  My goals come to me unexpectedly.

I never think about my goals.  I don’t go looking for them.

They are primal, they are guided, they appear when my soul is ready for them to appear, as if by magic.

Someone will say a word and my heart stops beating.  I’ll see a video and my mouth starts salivating.  My pen will flow over the page and I will step out of the way and see what appears, eyes wide open.

2.  I’m NEVER ready for my goals.

I have NO FUCKING CLUE how I’m going to achieve them.  I don’t even wonder anymore.  I don’t see a dream and press pause so that I can figure out the how.

They’re always way above my current abilities.

They’re always way bigger than I thought I would ever go.

I don’t care anymore.

I simply commit.

That’s it.

And I know, because I’m a woman of my word, that once I’ve committed, once I’ve said YES to my soul, it’s a fucking done deal.

Death Before DNF.

3.  If I don’t need to bring in the big guns, it’s not my goal to set.

My goals require support.  They require guidance.  They require expertise which I don’t have.

All of my goals require mentors and coaches.

If I can figure it out myself, if I have the TIME to figure it out myself, it’s a sub-par goal.

Walk away.

My goals require full commitment from me.  Like a jealous lover they take up my resources, my time, my focus, my energy.

They demand that I invest heavily in them, thereby investing heavily in myself.

When I hear people set goals and then say they’ll do it on their own, I know they’re still playing small.

4.  My goals demand sacrifice.

Everything is energy.

Everything vibrates on a certain level.

Including me.

Whatever is currently in my surroundings, is a complimentary vibration to me.

My goals, aren’t.

They vibrate on a higher level and in order for me to rise to their frequency, I have to be wiling to sacrifice all that is on my current vibration.

Lower vibrating thoughts.

Lower vibrating beliefs.

Lower vibrating ideas.

Lower vibrating food.

Lower vibrating relationships.

Lower vibrating clothes.

You think it doesn’t matter.  You think you can get away by holding on to a couple of things.

You can’t.

This is exactly why my goals demand sacrifice.

Letting go is almost always filled with some measure of sorrow.

It’s always filled with a good dose of fear.

I’ve discovered that I love certainty in life.  Which is exactly why I have such strict routines.  Which is why I hold on to things way too long.

It took me years to acknowledge to myself that I find change and unpredictability scary.

It took me a day to reframe that shit for myself to change equals adventure.

And we both know Momma LOVES adventures!

This has definitely changed my approach to releasing that which no longer serves me.  But don’t ever think I’m the cold-hearted, inconsiderate bitch they say I am.  It still hurts like a motherfucker.

People are the hardest to leave behind.

Yet I choose to believe that those who TRULY desire to play in my space, will go do their own work to rise with me.

As for the rest, I respect their journey.

Freedom of choice Darling.

5.  My goals don’t allow for days off.

My goals are big and complex and they require me to break them down into smaller parts, setting sub-goals, and then doing the work every single day.

Even today.

When the weather has turned to custard.

Pouring rain.

Howling wind.

And I have to go ride.

Because I’m racing on Sunday.

And even though it’s a Mickey Mouse race, a category C, it’s the first step on the journey to my category A race in 2020.

Everything counts.

It’s not about missing a session, it’s about what missing a session says about me.

It says I’m a pussy.

It says I’m unreliable.

It says I’m not the person required to cross the ultimate finish line.

It says that I don’t keep my word to myself and for me, that’s simply not an option.

I decided a long time ago to say what I mean and to mean what I say.

Even when people don’t believe me, because mostly, they stopped believing themselves a long time ago.

My life, my responsibility, my word, my honour.

It is my opinion that as long as you’re setting your soul-called goals, they will NEVER hold you back in life.  They will always drive you forward, higher, bigger, better.

If they’re not, if they don’t require serious commitment and sacrifice and overcoming obstacles, facing your greatest fears, they’re simply not the right goals for you to be setting Darling.

Stop setting a hundred goals at once.

Stop setting the goals you can achieve on your own.

Stop setting the goals that has you showing up the same today as you did yesterday.

Stop setting the nice-to-have goals.

Stop setting the goals approved by others.

Stop setting average goals!

Or else, settle for living an average life.

It’s as simple as that.

Only death is inevitable.

Thriving is always the choice of the brave.

With love and appreciation,

Anel

 

 

Feel like an imposter much? Welcome to the achievers club.

You have to love labels.

The way in which humanity attempts to make sense of the complexity of this fabulous experience called life.

Which OF COURSE means that someone had to give us a condition to call the unreasonable fear of high achievers of not being good enough in the company of fellow achievers.

And as with most labels, it’s dripped in shame, causing division and seperation.

The label of imposter syndrome is also what keeps so many born achievers, chained in mediocrity.

They think it’s unique to them.

That the fear they continuously feel in the presence of those they admire, must surely mean they’re inferior.

So they either tippy-toe around in the room,

or stay away altogether.

Today I’m inviting you to some deeper introspection by providing a possible interpretation to a feeling I have intimate knowledge of.

Not that I’m saying this is universal truth.

I no longer believe in universal anything – except love.

I believe in love.

Instead, I’m simply proposing a different possibility from which you can find YOUR truth,

and my intention is that it will be one that empowers you to stop hiding in the corner and walk among your peers proudly.

There lives within each achiever a restless, insatiable beast.

Regardless of how well you do, how much you achieve, how much others admire you,

you want more.

You want better.

You want to go higher.

Whilst receiving applause, you’re replaying your efforts in your mind, already spotting opportunities for improvement.

Chances are, in the beginning you spoke these words out loud, resulting in an immediate reprimand that you should stop being so hard on yourself.  That you did great.  Making you hang your head slightly lower in shame and feeling ungrateful and boastful.

So you stopped voicing your thoughts.

Except they never went away.

Secretly, you keep raising the bar.

Fighting the demons silently on the inside, whilst presenting to the world a facade of bravado and confidence.

Because in your world, competition is a real thing.

Competition – which has been made BAD by modern society.

We’ve gone from praising winners to scolding those up front, telling them to slow down, to wait for everyone else, to stop being so motherfucking inconsiderate and selfish.

That the achievement of some are responsible for the low self-esteem of others.

As if it’s your responsibility to carry the masses.

As if it’s up to you to motivate the lazy fuckers to change their ways.

Once again, achievers feel shame and increase their isolation.

Just as the king of the jungle, you are a rare and dying breed my friend.

Time for us to turn shame into pride.

What I want you to start realising is that you don’t operate the same as the masses.

Whilst they’re thinking of what to do on the weekend, you’re thinking up ways to increase productivity.

Whilst they’re wondering how early they can get away to go to the pub, you’re wondering how late you can work without getting into shit at home.

Whilst they’re planning holidays, you’re planning ways to work in the bathroom without getting caught out because quite frankly, holidays are an inconvenient disruption of your flow.

The average masses go into a room filled with experts and it’s all about how good it makes them look to walk among the great without having put in any effort.

They simply have no appreciation for dedication and sacrifice.

You go into that room and you unconsciously compare yourself to the public persona of those you admire.  Your role models.

And you’re afraid!

What if they ask you something and you don’t have the right answer?

What if all those years of study lets you down and you don’t say the most intelligent sounding thing?

Except, what nobody is telling you, is that these are the thoughts and fears of your icons as well!

Because where the masses don’t give a shit about dabbling,

your standards are nothing less than mastery.

Which is why you’re often seen as obsessed.

You have no desire to know a little.

For surface experiences.

You desire full immersion.

As you should.

Continuously comparing yourself to the next level of your potential,

the next level of your field,

you always feel inferior.

Even when you’re the leader of your company,

leader of your industry,

leader of your country.

Add to this the fact that true achievers understand the power in surrounding themselves with the best,

without letting them smell your fear,

and you can start having empathy with yourself Darling.

Being a high achiever is not for sissies.

Which is exactly why achievers work with trusted coaches and mentors privately.

It’s that one place where you can go and bring to light the insanity that is your mind, so that you may make sense of it all and live a life of conscious choice.

The constant unspoken fears and insecurities.

The battle between fear and trust.

No achiever I know has the desire to be vulnerable in front of everyone.

I sure as hell don’t.

I’m the first to say that if others could hear the voices inside my head,

the battle raging 24/7,

they would lock me up and throw away the key.

To make this even worse, society now calls for us to show our vulnerable side.

Those at the bottom has the masses chanting for blood.

Our blood.

Our tears.

They want to hear our fears so that they will feel better about theirs.

Taunting us to let down our guard and show our scars, our pain, our raw insides.

Well, I don’t know about you, but the masses can go fly a kite!

I’m taking a stand for the achievers.

I want you to know that the shit storm raging inside you is REAL.

It’s not your Achilles heel – it’s your super power.

That feeling you have of not being good enough, the fear of being caught out,

every achiever in the room feels that.

It’s what keeps us sharp, at the height of our game.

It’s what drives us to continuously learn more, experience more, practice more, fail more, do more.

This is a good thing!

That instinct you have to trust only those who don’t have a vested interest in the outcome,

is spot on.

For those are the people who will hold the space for you, challenge you, reflect to you, so that you may unlock the wisdom and power that is within.

Stop sharing your dreams, your fears, with average people.

They will never understand you.

You will trigger them and they will turn on you with words of fake love.

Saying that you should stop reaching so high.

That you should take it easier.

That you put too much pressure on yourself.

They will bring your fears under their magnifying glasses and increase them to the point where your desire becomes smaller than your fear and you will give in.

Everything that society is using against you right now,

all the characteristics they’re turning into shame,

is nothing more than your entrance card into the exclusive club of achievers.

It’s become an underground club.

One that only those hungry enough will seek out.

For you will feel alone and misunderstood on the way to the front door.

You will feel confused and get derailed by the hypnotic trance music of the cult of mediocrity.

It will take determination to push on.

And it will take focus.

You have to make it a non-negotiable.

You have to be willing to leave behind the Albatros holding you in place.

The alternative being an abandonment of who you are.

A wolf in sheeps clothing – not to prey but a desperate attempt to fit in and be part of the unit.

Starved and emancipated on the inside.

Gagging on the grass you’re chewing along with the millions of sheople around you.

Waiting for death.

Already defeated.

I lived in shame for most of my life up to this point.

Shaming the beast which is within my bones, my flesh, my thoughts, my heart.

No more.

I’m proudly reclaiming my nature as beast.

I will not show my underbelly to the weak preying on the strong.

I will walk proudly among my peers with my ‘imposter syndrome’ firmly in place, understanding that this keeps me honing my skills.

I will hold a sacred space for fellow achievers who desire to reclaim themselves.

I’m not ready to die yet.

So I choose to thrive.

This is my invitation to you today:

to choose your own interpretations of the storm raging within.

May it be a powerful choice my friend.

With deep love and appreciation of you,

Anel

 

 

 

 

The fundamentals of high achievement being

I suspect this piece can potentially come across as a tad harsh.

It’s not my intention to be overly critical but simply to share with you some of the unspoken fundamentals which achievers often take for granted, thereby creating a moment to pause and reflect on your own behaviour and habits.

It might be an unidentified strand in our DNA.

The mysterious missing link between those who appear to have inhuman focus, resilience and titanium ovaries and those who are consistently struggling, depressed, miserable, victims of the harsh climate of the world.

I see it from posts in certain ‘high achiever’ FB groups where it’s been brought to the host’s attention that people are showing up in a moronic fashion.

I see it in the frustration of my clients as they’re continuously attacked by loved ones, friends, colleagues, employees, who find them cold, unfeeling, inconsiderate and unrealistic in their expectations.

Personally, I’m always a little astounded at how needy majority of the population is and how they insist on transferring this neediness to everyone and anyone who stumble onto their radar.

How much they seek from without that which they’re too afraid to claim from within.

An unnamed fear that keeps the masses off the true playing field of life.

Here’s a few fundamentals I experience in true achievers:

True achievers treasure time.

The one resource that you can’t ever get back, is time!  Achievers not only understand this on an academic level, they have it ingrained into their very fibre.

They feel the pressure of time passing by and they have a sense of urgency to everything they do and desire to receive.

Unlike others who want to walk out to of the office at 5 pm sharp, the achiever is unable to rest until the outcomes of the day is complete.  Which is why we’re often told we’re going to burn out – bullshit!

What will burn you is a restless soul unable to sleep at night because YOU haven’t shown up fully today.

What will burn you is thinking that the insane categorisation of work vs play vs train vs life at designated times will ever give you a fulfilled life.

Thrive comes from reclaiming your time to focus on your desires according to your levels of energy as indicated by your biorhythms.

True achievers respect other players – we don’t disrupt their play.

As an achiever you understand that awareness of other players on the field is non-negotiable, even whilst staying in the zone.

It’s a sense that you cultivate and grow.

Pushing your awareness out so that you can adjust, react, increase, swerve, without bringing the peloton down.

It’s about understanding that even when we race, often on a single track, we move out of the motherfucking way when a stronger rider needs to pass.

It’s called RESPECT.

It’s about playing hard, and then, when you hit the wall or you feel that you need to catch your breath, you walk off the field and recharge WITHOUT disrupting the game for others.

I recall an incident at IronMan, passing a male rider on a climb.

As he saw me pulling up next to him, his ego kicked in and he started increasing his pace.

He was determined not to let me pass even though my mere presence meant that my average was higher than his.

Except, as there’s a no-drafting rule in IronMan, he was risking us getting penalised and I knew once he’d burned his match, I would overtake him anyway.

It took a referee’s instruction to sit up for him to get out of ego and let me pass.

I dropped his arse and never saw him again for the remainder of the race.

This level of petty behaviour costs everyone.

True achievers stay in their own game.  They compete with themselves.  They honour other players on the field.

In other words, don’t be a dick.

True achievers take full responsibility for their lives and their results.

I’m sorry to say but honestly, I’m getting at the end of my rope with the prevalent victim-mentality.

People walking around all day every day bitching about how tough life is, how much their relationships drain them, how they hate their lives and everything in it.

If you don’t love it, fucking change it!

Achievers understand that every action and word takes energy.

It uses up your capacity of creative thought.

They also understand that it is what it was.

In other words your decisions from yesterday created your results of today.

Instead of wasting precious energy on complaining, they focus their attention on the decisions they took which ultimately led to this point in time.

If they don’t like the outcome, they change THEIR decisions and actions today so they can have a different outcome tomorrow.

Achievers understand that their lives are not determined by the doings of others.

They choose to take the stance of empowerment and play the game taking into consideration the moves of other players – think chess board.

And again, achievers respect other players so they don’t load their bullshit onto others.

They create professional spaces and support systems for them to work through their demons – we don’t make our friends and loved ones our therapists.

Period.

True achievers GIVE and RECEIVE appropriately.

I’m often told by ‘experts’ that I give too much.

I should only share the what, not the how.

That I need to leave them wanting for more.

I couldn’t be fucked to follow this philosophy.

For me, there’s no limit to the amount of wisdom, tools and strategies I can share with you.

And I’m not afraid to give it all.

Why?

Because as any true achiever, I don’t believe in scarcity.

For me, the more people I can empower, the more people I can inspire to start living consciously,

the more ALL OF HUMANITY gains.

I celebrate the wins of a perfect stranger who messages me to say thanks for a transformational video as much as I celebrate the wins of my private clients.

My clients don’t work with me because they can’t find the answers on the internet.

My clients work with me because they value my personal attention and insights, the clarity I create on their internal war, my passion for their victory, my honest feedback, my relentless drive of them, my incredibly high standards of expectation which challenges them.

In the same breath, as a high achiever I follow the work of other incredible leaders in the field of mindset and achievement who give shit tons of value freely!

Now here’s an important point for you – true achievers receive that which is available AND PAY for personal attention.

It comes down to respect and valuing your mentors, coaches and teachers.

It would never cross my mind to contact my mentors and coaches for ‘coffee’ wanting to milk their minds.

It creates an unequal flow of energy.

Without financially investing, I’m unable to receive as my container is shallow.

That means that even if they had to gift me their most powerful secrets, I would not have the capacity to receive it.

Instead I learn their teachings and then sign up privately when I’m ready for more.

It’s common sense Darling – stop wanting everything for nothing.

In fact, when you review the above, you will find a common value,

Respect:

of yourself,

of others,

of your purpose,

of your dreams,

of humanity.

Of course all of this will only resonate if respect is as much a core value for you as it is for me.

Today I invite you to take a look at your behaviour and ask yourself, does this reflect my love and respect for myself, my dreams, as well as love and respect of those I choose to interact with.

Without shame or blame – simply approach this with an air of genuine curiosity and deep desire for self-awareness.

After all, only death is inevitable.

Thriving remains the choice of the brave.

With love and appreciation,

Anel

 

 

 

 

What if you dropped the struggle and BE who you came here to be?

As the LinkedIn Top Voices 2018 list was released, the response was humbling to say the least.

Most look at me and think I’m this outgoing bragging bitch,

those who know me,

will tell you I’m the complete opposite.

I’m that introvert who simply committed to my purpose.

The one who shows up regardless of how much I squirm in my pants.

And being put in the spotlight sees me squirming a lot.

Which is why I don’t do what I do for applause or recognition.

I love being the coach BEHIND the top achievers.

What’s really interesting for me though are the comments of deserving after all the hard work.

Which left me reeling with guilt.

Because honestly,

I don’t experience my work as hard.

OMG it’s the complete opposite.

Last weekend I finally listened to all the care-bears and took two days off,

disconnecting from ‘work’,

trying to ‘relax’.

By Saturday night I was going out of my motherfucking mind!

By Sunday morning I secretly pulled out my laptop and started creating, writing, planning, behind closed doors.

Resisting who I am, denying my very nature in an attempt to conform to the expectations and demands of others, fitting what I came here to do into a work-life mentality where days and activities are dictated by calendars and clocks,

is HARD AF!

Allowing myself to do my soul work is the easiest thing in the world.

To let the message flow through me.

Getting out of my head and drop into my heart and then to create from a space of love.

Giving free reign to my badass bitch who thrives in the hustle, the push, the grind, the sweat, the tears.

When I am in my zone others step the fuck out of the way for the focus and intensity is raw and primal and wild.

This is where human potential meets spiritual potency in creating an intense experience of life.

I don’t do it for accolades, recognition or money.

I do it because it’s who I am.

Who I choose to be.

I do it because when I chose to release the shackles of depression, victimhood and misery,

I chose to show up authentically for all who choose to be inspired by my insanity,

to wake up from the drudgery of existence,

and to consciously choose to thrive.

What’s hard for me is trying to fit in!

OMG going to cocktail parties and talking about completely irrelevant bullshit and niceties sees me hiding in the bathroom waiting for the clock to strike ten so I can make my escape.

Speaking vanilla fills me with the urge to defecate (thank you for the artistic expression Pink Floyd).

Sitting on my arse doing nothing is excruciating.

As a high achiever I find conforming to the expectations of an average world hard.

I find compromising tough.

Because people want us to slow down not understanding how draining it is for us to move at their snails pace.

They want us to wallow in their miserable ideas that the hustle is a struggle.

They want us to lower our standards and expectations because apparently it’s too high.

It’s not fair on everyone else for us to say step up or step out.

It’s not realistic of us to choose excellence in our lives, our companies, our work.

What?

the?

fuck?

What if instead you stopped the struggle of being less than who you know you are?

What if you stopped the hardship of holding your inner beast back on strained leash?

What if you broke free from the prison in your mind that has you smiling in public and screaming in agony in private?

What if my friend,

you made the decision that all those who are not willing to embrace the beauty of your full potential,

can stay behind.

Honouring their choice and free will,

as you honour your own?

Who would you be?

How would you show up?

Who would you walk away from?

Fuck, who would you run from?

How will you fill your days with magical experiences?

What would you do to celebrate your victories?

Someone recommended yesterday that I celebrate the Top Voice recognition.

I did an hour long FB live in my group sharing deeply from my heart, my soul, my purpose!

It was the most rewarding, most joyous expression of my gratitude and appreciation of life.

THIS is available to you if you just stop pretending you’re anything but

FUCKING MAGNIFICENT!!

It’s not about what you do Darling.

It’s not about the action work that you take.

It’s about who you choose to be and how you choose to define the experience.

Yes, you will trip up.

I still do.

Just look at this past weekend.

I mean seriously, what was I thinking believing them that doing NOTHING would recharge my batteries????

Yet part of the human experience is contradiction.

It’s about disconnecting from yourself, your truth, every now and again,

looking at the experts and doing what their research confirms,

and then deciding for yourself.

If it feels fabulous, easy, in flow, for your soul (not necessarily your body),

do more of that.

If on the other hand it feels draining, depressing, restless, shit, for your soul,

stop it!

Just stop it!

My invitation to you today is to sit down and to CHOOSE who you desire to be.

In full glory.

Celebrating your best potential.

And then,

if you’re really committed to your thrive,

BE YOU!

It won’t be easy in the beginning.

There will be fears roaring rage inside your mind.

There will be people who plead, threaten and lash out at you.

The temptation to sit back down will be great.

You simply have to be stronger than all of that.

Because when you think about it,

the only person who is guaranteed to be with you your entire life,

is YOU.

Why not choose to have the best of you along for the ride?

Of course, it’s always a choice.

Only death is inevitable.

Thriving is always the choice of the truly brave.

With deep love and appreciation of you,

Anel.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Are you asking yourself the best questions?

I love biting off more than I think I can chew.

I love waking up in the morning, deciding it’s time to step up, and then saying YES to whatever the Universe decides to dish up.

I love closing my eyes in denial of my insanity when I hit the enter button.

It keeps me focused.

It keeps me sharp.

It keeps the adrenaline pumping just enough to ensure my feet hit the floor before 5 am every morning.

Which saw me out on The Cookie Monster in the early hours Saturday whilst neighbours were hitting the snooze button.

After a downpour of rain, I knew it was going to be muddy AF.

Okay okay, so maybe I had just a little bit of saliva forming in my mouth at the prospect of getting dirrrrty.

Approaching the single tracks, I found myself excitedly anticipating the post-storm change in landscape.

I didn’t have long to wait.

A mere twenty meters in, I came to a screeching halt as a fallen tree completely cut off the route.

There was no way around.

The height made it impossible to go over.

Which meant I would have to navigate the twisting branches, crawling on my knees, having to pick up TCM at crazy angles to get her to the other side.

Enter, the voice…

‘Hmmmmm,

if this is how the route starts,

it could prove to be a tricky ride.

It will fuck up my average speed.

Grrrrr, frustrating.

It might be impossible further down and then I would have to turn around and do it all again.

I don’t really need to train mud-running today.

I don’t really have to work on the technical travesties of mountain biking.

I can just go onto the stop-banks and hit out some intervals.’

Yes, she is a little bitch, and she can find excuses like a pro!

Then again,

“What would I do if this was race day?”

Dammit!

Scrape knees, knock elbows, kiss mud.

THIS is the power of the questions you ask yourself.

A strategy I learned years ago.

As I look back on my cycling wins, it’s clear that the races which ended on the podium, were the ones in the worst conditions.

Normally storms raged which had most competitors opt to stay in bed.

From those who started, few persevered to the end.

Constantly battling head-winds can feel like soul-draining traversing over a mountain top.

Rain drops turn into a razor-blades creating the sensation that your skin’s being cut from bones, talk about next level mind-fuck.

Small wonder that most eventually sacrifice a possible win for shelter.

Why did I get to the finish lines?

Because the months and weeks and days prior to the race,

when the weather was shit,

I would ask myself

“What would I do if this was race day?”

I understood that for me to race in any condition, I have to be willing to train in any condition.

I have to be prepared to get to the target, regardless of what Mother Nature and life throws my way.

Sometimes stress led to little or no sleep.

I would train.

Sometimes a sick child up all night would leave me feeling like a bleached dishtowel.

I would train.

Sometimes a rescheduled meeting would mean having to show up with no make-up and pony-tail hair.

I would train.

And so instead of asking myself “how can I make this easier?” or “what would be a more convenient time to do this?” or “what is everyone else doing?”

I showed the fuck up.

I did whatever I committed to doing BEFORE I knew what the conditions would be.

To this day, I honour these values.

I walk through mud when I can no longer ride.

I climb through trees when I can’t get around.

I cry unashamedly when it hurts and keep moving forward.

I scream out loud when the storm rages against me, and keep looking to where I desire to go.

Most people will think this is excessive.

I know better.

Because what I learn on the field,

I take into life.

Why don’t I give up when the shit hits the fan, when the economy goes down the toilet, when my website falls over, when the payment system goes down, when I don’t get public applause?

Simple.

I train resilience, purpose, passion, commitment on the trails and bring it into the office.

I know where I’m heading and I will show up every single day REGARDLESS of the circumstances.

Knowing no matter how tough it gets, I’m stronger.

Knowing that although obstacles can be frustrating, I will eventually find the solutions.

Knowing I will continue to break down to my knees, and my Soul will continue to rise.

None of this happens when I ask the ‘easy option’ questions.

When I ask the “hooooooooow” questions.

When I look around at others and draw comparisons, excusing myself because quite frankly, most people are lazy and weak of mind.

Instead, I choose to keep my head in the game and to draw from within.

Today I invite you to start paying attention to your questions.

Not just the ones you say out loud – you know, the ones you’ve thought through and voice thinking they’ll make you sound super intelligent or badass.

I’m talking about the ones that you’re unconsciously asking yourself before deciding on every single action:

What you put into your mouth;

What you put on your action list;

What you put on your body;

What you choose to believe;

Who you choose to talk to.

All of these seemingly inconsequential actions are preceded by a question.

And when your questions smack of little to no effort,

in other words the ones that reveal underneath the big talk you’re actually a lazy sloth,

understand that your results will reflect this.

If on the other hand, your questions are performance driven,

well Honey,

you know you’re going to be purring like a kitten when you go to sleep at night,

exhausted but satisfied.

You might have a few extra scrapes and bruises,

but you ain’t made to be wrapped in cotton wool.

If you’re serious about success, 

paying attention to the mind-details,

is simply

non-negotiable.

Only death is inevitable.

Thriving is the choice of the badass brave asking the questions that lead to peak performance.

With love and appreciation,

Anel