This is my personal truth.
I have to admit that in the early years success came without too much effort. I was the girl who studied for 4 hours and got good grades. I was the young woman who went for her first ever interview and got the job. I was the woman who shot into management by age 22 – I was a natural leader. I was confident. The world was my oyster and it was fun!
Fast forward to my thirties and I was a shadow of my former self. With two small kids, a marriage that was falling apart, an out of shape body and the confidence of a wall-flower. My world had transformed from belle of the ball to sweeper of the grounds. Is it any wonder that I fell into the clutches of depression?
It took me years to get to the point of enough and no more. To the point where I decided to take my life back into my own hands. To get back into shape. To start speaking my truth. To put the happy back into my marriage. To be the powerful woman I was born to be.
It was fantastic. I started my own business and grew it to a level of sustainability within a year and less than 12 month later I had a staff compliment of 5. I was well on my way to building the business of my dreams, and then shit went wrong! In buckets.
I was broke and miserable again. Why?
I had decided that my man couldn’t possibly handle it if I became truly successful so I sabotaged my business from every angle.
I started business number two and found success being a roller coaster ride of hugely successful months followed by near poverty. It took me some time, but I finally figured it out:
I was fucking terrified of success!
I grew up with just enough which by definition was enough. Living an average life in an average suburb surrounded by average people was comfortable and safe. It was the known. Living on the other side of the tracks – well quite frankly darling I had no fucking idea how to be that woman. But I would never admit that to myself! I was the confident sexy ball-breaker who could achieve anything she set her mind to. So to protect myself my Ego created ‘the man’. My scapegoat for average.
When you understand how powerful you are in creating your world, you understand that you create your partner through your subconscious beliefs which dictate your behavior which leads to a self-fulfilling prophecy. The moment that you decide your man can’t handle your success, you bring that to your relationship, he reacts accordingly and you stay small. Very fucking convenient.
It took me a long time to admit this to myself. Even longer to have the conversation with him.
With my final excuse for staying small taken care of, I could finally own up and build a thriving business. With a very proud and happy man by my side I might add.
What is your excuse? Your partner? Your children? Your parents? Your weight? Your lack of education? Your location? Your lack of money?
Understand that all of that is bullshit.
There are women who are in relationships, who have kids, who are not in the best shape, with no degree, who came from the wrong side of the tracks, who are living their dreams! Who are building successful businesses. Who are travelling first class to luxurious destinations. And no, they are not special! They didn’t have more opportunities than you.
They simply believed in themselves.
There is nothing you cannot be, do or have.
Believe and it will be so.
Death is inevitable darling. Thriving is a choice.
I work with the women who are ready to face their fears and thrive. If that is you, let’s chat.