Beware the energy vampires in leadership clothing

Everything matters.

Everyone matters.

In your personal space.

In your social space.

In your online space.

It’s called emotional contagion – the psychological phenomenon where we start taking on the personality traits of those we spend our time with.  We start becoming like those around us.

This includes vibrating on the same level as them.

And there’s a lot of fucking low vibrating vamps out there at the moment Darling bringing others to the ground without them ever realising they’ve bent their knees.

Their hunger is insatiable.

Their hunger for sympathy.

Their hunger to suck the high vibration out of those who are dedicated to their art and doing the work.

The real work.

The work that has them showing up as true leaders for their soul tribes.

Whether that soul tribe is clients or family or friends.

These vamps are vibrating on the bottom of the ocean and it’s their mission to bring everyone down to their own level.

And they’re oh so crafty about it.

They don’t walk around with a big sign stating “I’m taking you down with me!”, sharpened teeth overhanging their lower lips, energetic blood dripping down their chins.

Oh no!

Instead they worm themselves into positions of trust, where they say the right words, have the right titles, make the right claims, except there is an energetic discord between what they are saying and what they are doing.

They are very likeable.

They pull you in with their charm and their promises and then slowly but surely they start complaining a little here, a little there.  Next thing you know they share their constant struggles and have mini meltdowns on social media.  They come into your space and sit with slumped shoulders waiting for you to kiss their booboo.

Seeking sympathy.

And OMG do they receive an abundance of sympathy!

Every Tracy, Henriette and Sally throws their energetic arms around them, soothing, rocking, comforting.

Smothering them with words of ‘sorry’ and ‘it will be all-right’ and ‘hang in there’.

The vamp gets exactly what she wanted.

She starts smiling.

She raises her chin.

Yeah!  She’s overcome everything!

Just look at her – what a real little trooper.

But what the sly bitch has done is bring all the sympathisers to an energetic pause in their lives.  For a moment they lowered their vibration to be equal to hers in a show of sisterhood and instantly they’ve taken themselves off their previous trajectory.

Tell me honestly:

Are you an energetic vampire?


Are you a vampiric feast?

This sounds harsh but quite frankly the world is changing too fast and there’s too much turmoil for us to continue tolerating this behaviour.

Who is it serving other than those who are working to keep you small?

Know that it’s not your responsibility to save anyone else!

Your soul responsibility is to become your best version self thereby inspiring others through your example to pull up their proverbial socks, do the fucking work, and choose to thrive for themselves.

As a leader it’s your responsibility to surround yourself with other leaders who focus on creative solutions NOT the losers who only see the boulder stating it’s a mountain.

Where in your life are you still tolerating the slow suck of a vampire?

Everywhere counts!

Are you hanging in groups where there’s a shit ton of vamps thinking that as long as you don’t get caught up in their posts you’ll be okay?

You’re fooling yourself Gorgeous.

They only need your energetic stamp in the group to hook you.

More importantly, why are you tolerating it?

What is the value, the belief system, that says it’s your fucking responsibility to save those who are too bloody lazy to save themselves?

Everyone has the ability, the capability, of rising above their challenges and thrive!

Sympathy doesn’t provide the foundation for strength.

So the more you sympathise, the more you are feeding their addiction to victimhood.

Does this mean that leaders don’t have meltdowns?

That leaders are fearless?

That leaders are always confident and have their shit together every single minute of every day in every area of their lives?


But true leaders take up the calling knowing that stepping into the front means you have a massive responsibility to show up for your tribe as your best version self.

This is why true leaders always have the professional support required to keep it together.

They work through their private shit in private with trusted advisors, mentors and coaches.

They do the mindset work every single day to ensure that they have the grit to weather the storm.

To instill confidence in their followers.

Never once have I seen a true leader expect to be sheltered from the storm.

A true leader takes the brunt of it knowing and believing that every obstacle, every hardship, every challenge, is a gift for learning and strength.

A true leader feels the fear and takes the action regardless.

Leadership is different for everyone.

Maybe you’ve chosen to be the leader of your family.

Step the fuck up and lead!

Maybe you’ve chosen to be the leader in your company.

Step the fuck up and lead!

Maybe you’ve chosen to be the leader in your community.

Step the fuck up and lead!

Lead with honour.

Lead with conviction.

Lead with faith.

The warrior doesn’t stand on the battle ground telling everyone around him how terrified he is.

He sucks it up.

He puts his game face on.

He prays to his maker and he makes his peace to die today if that is what it will take!

Will you die for your tribe?

Will you?

If not, get off the pedestal, go do the work, and come back.

Or stay in the back.

There is no shame in being part of the crowd if that is where you truly desire to be.

There is only shame in dragging those who trust you down into your pity party.

It’s time for the true leaders to step up and ruthlessly evict the vampires!

My castle.

My rules!

What are you choosing today?

For only death is inevitable.

Thriving, leadership, is a choice.

With love always,


PS:  I am the least sympathetic coach you will ever come across.

That’s because I believe in you.

I believe that you are capable of eradicating your self-limiting beliefs, reset your emotional set point, and succeed!

I believe that anything you can possibly dream of, you have the ability to achieve, regardless of how impossible it may seem at the outset.

I believe that whatever you see in another that triggers a desire in you is available to you as well.

But I also believe that you have to stop playing around with your goals.

I believe that for you to become the leader, the creative, the achiever you claim to be you have to do the work.

The real work.

And you need to fight your demons in a sacred space created just for you out of the public eye.

That is the space I hold for my clients.

A judgement free, bullshit free space where you get to make empowered choices of how you show up.

A space where you get to cry, curse, shake and tremble knowing that by the time we part ways you will have the t-spoon of cement in your espresso to go back and kick ass.

I work with those who choose to thrive.

If you’re ready for the ride book your consult here.