The Silent Warrior – The Kitten Finds Her Roar

This is my personal truth.

43 today.  Fuck, it feels amazing.

Journaling this morning was given to reflection of what it took for me to get to this point.

Strangely, I have always felt that I was born in the wrong place, into the wrong culture.  It is really no wonder that I was constantly in shit.

For as long as I can remember I questioned the rules and found them fucked up.  I never understood why children should not be heard, why we had to respect our elders when majority of them clearly showed no respect to us, why women should be subservient – barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen.  I didn’t believe in corporal punishment and saw it as a weakness on the side of the adult who could not contain their own temper.

In a culture that demands unconditional submission, I’m sure you can understand why I received so many hidings both physically and emotionally.  Finally I gave up – gave in to the idea that you can’t fart against thunder.  And so I would give soft meows when I wanted to say something and purred when I received approval.

I was playing by the rules and I fucking hated the game.

Then, after 40, something began to change.  I was no longer satisfied with empowering others but still seeking approval in my own life.  Approval from those I love and those that I didn’t know from a bar of soap.  I thought that in order for me to be accepted in the professional arena, I had to speak like a lady, behave like a lady, surround myself with other ladies.

But what if the lady was not a pussy cat?  What if instead she was an amazingly powerful lion???  What if she was so passionate that fucked up societal rules to keep you in your place (they call it respect) could no longer contain her?  What if she could strut into the arena with her head held high and just not give a shit if strangers could not see her beauty, her grace, her power – just because it made the other cats look like pussies?  And what would happen the day that she roared??

That is exactly what happened to me this year and it was magical.

What I found was that there is an entire pride of lionesses out there that was waiting for me to find my voice!  A pride who have stepped into their personal power and like me, questioned what they have been told for so long.  A pride that called out to me and took me into their circle without hesitation or judgement.  I am finally home.

The world has more than enough pussies.  And the fact of the matter is, that holistically, things are not working because the rules that have governed our behaviour for so long, does not make sense to the younger generations and therefore have a negative effect on society as a whole.  Instead the world needs more lionesses who will tap into their power, gracefully say ‘fuck it’, and have their unique voices heard.

I know that not everyone will understand this blog.  And please don’t get me wrong – I completely respect the fact that we are all different.  Some people thrive in the safety of the rules.  They have a desire to fit in and not upset the apple cart.  That is perfect too – as long as they are being authentic to their true selves.  Nature has more varieties of animals than we even know of, and humans are as diverse and unique.  There is place for all of us.

At age 43 I am finally free from wearing the suffocating masks.  No, not everyone likes me.  And that is okay with me.  I wasn’t born to be a people pleaser.  Love me or hate me, you will never forget me.

i AMBecause today I am woman – hear me ROAR!!!

The Silent Warrior – Be amazed by the gorgeous Anna Hughes

This is my personal truth.

One of the perks of my life is the fact that I am constantly meeting the most amazing women from around the world who inspire me through their personal experiences.  Today I share with you the story of a woman who have introduced me to the concept of a life-gasm.  I’m sure that you will agree with me that the world needs more people like Anna Hughes.

It was the day I decided to take full ownership of my life even when at the time I could barely foresee what direction my life would take.

And I thought giving birth to my daughters was tough. That certainly changed my life.

But little did I anticipate what a moment of total surrender under the grueling heat in the Sahara Desert would lead to. Time is only relative as I am still getting goosebumps savoring in the achievements from being a finisher of the Marathon des Sables.

I had prepared for this ultra marathon for 1.5 years. Well before that, back in 1999(!), I had seen a documentary on TV and in that moment a burning desire in me evoke from deep, deep inside.

This dream settled inside of me for 10 years!

I had the absolute faith that I was going to reach that goal one day and cross that finish line. wanted it so truly, madly and deeply that I literally became obsessed about turning this BIG DESIRE into reality.

I remember being entirely fueled up by the pure thought of running in the dunes, on dried lakes with barely any shade to cool off.

Something ticked inside me. I could not explain what it was. I just BELIEVED that I could do it. And took inspired action.

Every minute of the day I would think about it. I could feel the vibes through my body. Talk about LIFE-GASM.

I dedicated my free time to prepare for that race in the midst of raising two young kids at the time. It is all possible if you have the ABSOLUTE WILL.

I optimized my nutrition, training and equipment and invested tons of hours into meditation and visualization techniques.

Unapologetically, I took ownership of this desire feeling that I had already made it to that finish line. I felt invigorated my all those positive thoughts and felt in the best shape I had ever been in came race day.
I raced like an animal. As if my life depended on it. There was a magical power that busted open.

But…on the road to success there are obstacles to overcome. I got the flu three days prior to flying to Moroc. I lost weight. For a minute I felt devastated that my dream would be out of reach. That I would not make it to the start line.

But I did not give up. I did not lose FAITH that I would make it no matter what.
I wanted to succeed and perform on the highest level possible for me.

Fast forward to Day 4 of the 250 K long race. After having been on my feet for 11 hours I began hallucinating. I had a tunnel vision focusing on just setting one foot in front of the other.

My thoughts became clearer and clearer. I dropped a huge burden and left in somewhere en route in the desert.

My family appeared before my inner eye, I looked at the two wonderful bracelets reminding me of my kids’ unconditional support. I felt so grateful at that moment where I was being left with only the bare essentials of food, water, some spare clothes and my own good company.

From that moment onwards I knew there was nothing and no one stopping me from getting to that finish line.

The POWER of my thoughts, my indestructible mindset had taken over.

On Day 6 I crossed the finish line and collapsed into the arms of the race director who wrapped the medal around my neck. I cried my eyes out and never felt so grateful.

I could not believe my own belief. I had made it. I had captured my biggest desire at the time. The medal representing so much more than pain, heat and blistery feet.

That day transformed my life forever.

Up until today that flow has not stopped. The experience has enabled me to play the bigger game in life.

I want to remind you to follow your dreams and desires. Always. Unapologetically. Becoming the biggest version of yourself. It is possible. Without the slightest doubt.

Every one else around you will benefit from your glorious aura as an empowered woman.

Are you ready to take the leap and succeed at an elite level you never thought possible?

Are you ready to take ownership of your feminine power and rock it out in the world?

#1: Take that first step today. Tapping on your desire that gets you burning from the inside out and that totally invigorates you.

#2: Take the first action step toward that goal now. Commit to following a clear plan and nothing will stop you from living a life less ordinary.

LIFE-GASMS guaranteed!

The Silent Warrior – Players and Spectators

This is my personal truth.

The rugby world cup has started again which makes for some pretty interesting times in our home.  To see how excited we all get whilst watching the game would probably have most people rolling on the floor with laughter.  Yet, we take the sport of spectatorship really serious – well, some of us more seriously than others.

I took a moment to reflect on this from a different angle today and realized how this entire phenomenon of the spectator vs the player plays out in our every-day lives.

First there are the players.  The people who are IN the game.  The ones who are committed to achieving their goals, winning in their lives.  It is a disciplined life where sacrifices are made.  Sometimes you have to say no to the parties that everybody else is going to.  Most days you have to get up early and drag your ass out of bed to train, to plan, to work, to do what needs to be done.  There are sore bodies to deal with.  Everybody gets injured along the way.  And you know that no matter how much you train, no matter how much you learn, no matter how much you prepare, winning is not guaranteed.  It all comes down to the day.  You learn to pray.  You learn to give it your all.  You learn to deal with pain, with aching lungs.  You learn to deal with disappointment.  Because sometimes you don’t see the gap, or you miss the ball, or you aim in the wrong direction.  And if you don’t win today, you will go back, get up earlier, train harder, get a new game plan, and try again.  You will ask for the input from the spectators, to show you what you have missed, where you can do better, and you will incorporate all relevant feedback into your game plan.  Whether in rugby, running, marriage, or business – you are a player.

Then there are spectators.  The people who only watch the game.  Sometimes they are experts at the rules – knowing exactly how the game should be played in order to win.  They have a birds eye view and can see the gaps which players sometimes miss.  They are pumped full of adrenaline and jump up and down – cheering and jeering all the time.  They praise the wins and curse the losses.  They can be unforgiving because they have forgotten what it feels like to have your muscles screaming and your lungs burning as you give it your all, but that is not enough today.  They get swept up in the energy of the crowd, and sweep up those around them.  Sometimes unforgiving, the spectators expect those they back to win at all cost!  To play perfectly every day, every time.  And if you don’t win today, they expect you to go back, to get up earlier, to train harder, to get a new game plan and to do better next time.  They will go home and continue sleeping in and wait for the next game so they can watch, support and criticize.  Whether in rugby, running, marriage, or business – these are the spectators.

Thing is, there can be no game without players and spectators.  But have you ever noticed how few players there are compared to spectators?  Some of us choose to be both.  In my life I am always the player, but I have chosen the role of spectator as a coach to give my clients my birds eye view.  To teach them the rules as I understand them.  To provide them feedback on lost opportunities and what they can try differently next time.  Being a player as well, I can do this with compassion.  Because I still hurt, my muscles still scream, my lungs still burn.  I still play.  And I welcome the input of other players taking on the role of spectators!  Because these are the people who not only know the rules, but who knows that winning the game is all about mind-set.  And mind-set is not understood if you only live in the stands.

So what are you?  Are you a player or a spectator?  And more importantly, does this choice serve to create a life that will leave others in awe at your magnificence?

Is it time to get off the stand and on to the playing field?

Walk with honor.

The Silent Warrior – The most powerful question a mother can ask

This is my personal truth

Today I am speaking directly to all the mothers out there. Although this question can be just as powerful for any woman who does not have children of her own, or for any father.

I don’t have many childhood memories – probably because most of them were really shit so I have blocked out a lot. My early childhood was in a home with an abusive father who passed on his behaviors to his son, which resulted in a very unhappy and submissive mother, and me, the rebel, who got punished on a regular basis. Oh don’t feel sorry for me, I was born to be a warrior! This was simply my training ground.

But as a little girl I could never understand why my mom would possibly tolerate this life for seventeen years!! Which is how long it took her to finally leave my sperm donor. When I asked her, she would always say she stayed for us, for her children. She thought it was the best thing she could do for us, because how could she possibly make it on her own? How could she take our father away from us?

2015-08-30 11.49.01I love my mother. God knows I would give my life for this woman who has served as my pillar of strength and who continues to be my inspiration every single day. Unfortunately what I didn’t realize for many years, is that because of this love for her, I made a soul contract which stated that I would suffer for her in return, so that she could live in the knowledge that she made the right decision in staying for so long in a nightmare of a marriage. And so I manifested really painful relationships which I suffered for the sake of others.

The Universe, in its compassion and love, finally released me from this soul contract by giving me the mentors, coaches and tools that would reveal this contract to me and give me the opportunity to start making better decisions. The question I started asking myself is: Would I want this life for my children one day?

Breathe in the power of this question: Would I want this life for my children one day?

This question has changed my entire world for me! Because the moment I ‘got it’, the moment that I started looking at my life and my decisions from my children’s perspective, I stopped being a martyr!

I stopped tolerating destructive and abusive relationships. I stopped staying in jobs that made me miserable so that I could be the ‘responsible’ adult who pays the bills. I stopped sitting on the carpet with my children feeling fat and miserable so instead I got on my bike and rode away my stress. I stopped looking like shit because I first had to take care of everyone else which meant there was never any money or energy left for me.

I started making the life choices that I would want my children to make one day.

I also finally started having real conversations with my mom. And I started asking her for help when I needed it. Because as a mom, I would be devastated if my kids didn’t have the freedom and courage to ask me for help one day or to have the open and honest conversations with me.

This blog needs to come with a bit of a warning though: when you start making more empowered decisions like this, people are going to judge! There will always be those mothers and fathers who call you selfish, irresponsible, crazy even. Let them. Because unless they wake up really happy each morning, unless they are making decisions that they would want their kids to make one day, they are simply stuck in soul contracts which they are not even aware of!

I cannot tell you how often I meet people with un-lived dreams ‘because of their children’. They can’t possibly take the chance now ‘because of their children’. They can’t possibly have a happy relationship now ‘because of their children’. But what are you modelling to your children? That misery and suffering awaits them when they are adults because having children is like a prison sentence for the next twenty years?? That they will go from free-spirited brave souls to whipped, groveling, suffering martyrs? Geez and we wonder why the next generation don’t want to have kids…

I am not saying you must quit your job today, get a divorce or start living like a bum. I am inviting you to have an honest look at your life and see where you are using your children as an excuse to live small, or for being miserable. To set better, more empowering goals and to start working towards them immediately! To start asking for help where you need it. If your marriage is unhappy, then either leave or turn it around to the best relationship in the world!!! Yes darling, it is possible. If you are unhappy in your job then sit down and figure out what does your dream job look like and either create it in your current place of employment or go out and find it or create it in your own company. Whatever you do, for the love of humanity, stop suffering for the little children!!!

I am inviting you to ask the question: Would you want this life for your children one day?

Walk with honor.

The Silent Warrior – Fairy Tales Are True!

This is my personal truth.

Do you ever wonder where fairy tales come from?  I believe they come from wisdom.  From ancient truths which find their way into our hearts without us knowing.

I love fairy tales.  Always have.  In fact, I still have some of my favorite fairy tale books which my mom bought me when I was a little girl.  Of course my collection has grown considerably to include themes like The Hobbit. Shannarah and Belgarath the Sorcerer among others.  But they all include magic, wizards, witches, trolls and dragons.

Yes, I do believe in magic.  It might not come to us from a wand or a spell book, but in the never ending energies flowing through creation bringing about change or making our dreams come true in the most amazing ways.

RosesTake these roses for instance.  I woke up Saturday morning with a deep craving in my heart for something beautiful.  I wanted something unique that would touch all my senses and make me feel alive (the dream). I decided that before the end of the day something beautiful would come into my life (casting the spell).  Adriaan and I went out on a tedious errand to apply for an unabridged birth certificate at the Department of Home Affairs, but after driving to 3 locations, we decided to rather stop to buy croissants for breakfast.  The moment I walked into the store and saw this bunch of roses, I knew that they were what I wanted!  Now, if you look really closely at the perfection of each of these flowers, you will understand the level of magic that went into creating them!  Absolutely MAGNIFICENT!!

 

Let’s take it further!  Do you remember the story of the Frog Prince?  What this story is really about is the power of our perceptions and transformation that occurs through the act of love.  The sad truth is, I’m finding more andFrog princess more people are expecting the worst of others.  And what we believe, we perceive.  I had this conversation with my son whilst we were out walking the dogs.  He told me how rude people are in general and that only one out of ten people ever greet him back when he walks to school in the morning.  I said to him: ‘I’m sorry that is your belief about people.  I believe that people are really friendly and always waiting for an opportunity to connect with me.  That is why I find every person I greet on my runs in the morning not only greets me back with a smile, but they take it a step further to ask me how I’m doing’.  Your beliefs create your thoughts create your perceptions create your reality.  I bet you will find that when you change your negative beliefs about certain people, you will find some love in your heart for them and that will change the way you see them.  The frog truly does turn into the prince.

hyenaNOOOOOOO I don’t live with my head in the sand! I know that no matter how positive our belief systems, there will always be those who choose the dark side.  Just yesterday I decided to try my hand at Periscope.  It took all of 30 seconds for the first pervert to find my broadcast and start making really inappropriate remarks.  Hiding behind their faceless internet identities of @20brightspark (oh wait, that would be too long a word for them to spell!), they go around circling the internet like a pack of hyenas so they can disrupt learning for others.  I was quickly reminded why we live in a society filled with mediocrity!  Because instead of making the most of the opportunities that the Universe is providing them to learn and better their lives, they turn it into a game on insults, edging each other on.  Yip – I now know you can block them.  But how sad that the developers even had to create such a function.

Just remember that they exist, be valiant and don’t back down.  They have chosen to disrupt and hang onto their identities of victims with all their might.  It doesn’t mean you have to live your life according to their rules.  We all know the story ends where the lions kicked their asses!

evil queen

 

From the Wicked Queen (mother-in-law:  I’m just kidding!!), to the troll under the bridge (the fear that keeps us from achieving our biggest dreams), to dragons (the average masses that swoop down on you the moment you stand out in a crowd), fairy tales probably have more wisdom hidden in them than all the psychology books in the world.

 

 

It is about really seeing the princess within you that deserves living in a beautiful castle with the prince of your dreams.  It is about having the knight in shining armor fighting next to you for your cause because your purpose is brilliant.  It is about following your dreams and knowing that magic exists to make them come true.  It is about realizing that you don’t have to be the biggest or the smartest or the scariest to come out tops – hey, look at what those dwarfs did!!!

I invite you to go read some of your favorite fairy tales again and to find the wisdom hidden deep within them.  And start sharing them with your kids!  Not to teach them that magic only happens in fairy tales, but to show them that magic truly does exist in their lives and the power that they have in co-creating their reality.

Walk with honor.

The Silent Warrior – Moving Into The Pain

This is my personal truth.

I hold her soft warm body gently in my arms.  Cleo looks up at me with her piercing emerald green eyes, filled with love, filled with trust.  Not understanding why the tears are silently running down my cheeks.  Not understanding why we are in this strange place and why they had put this piece of plastic into her leg.  Not understanding why I keep whispering “I’m so sorry” over and over again.

But I know.  I know and my heart is shattering into a million pieces.

I was expecting her to fight.  She was always fighting.  There were always claws and hissing and loud war cries involved.  But not in this moment.  She is so still.  She doesn’t move.  Just keeps looking into my eyes.

“Are you ready?” the vet asks in a quiet voice.  I nod and watch as he inserts the needle into the drip and slowly pushes the liquid into her body.  Instantly her body goes limp in my arms.  Not the type of limp that we are familiar with.  It is as if her insides have turned into pure liquid and only her skin is holding her together.

Never before have I understood at this level that it is not our bones or muscles that give us solidity.  It is only our souls.  The moment the soul leaves the body, nothing solid stays behind.  I have never understood at this level.  And I don’t understand in this moment because my mind is going numb with pain.  I will only understand in a few days from now when I ask a different question on my run.

The vet leaves the room.  I look at her little body in my arms.

I don’t know what to do.  I don’t want to put her on the cold metal table so instead I take her blanket out of the carrier and gently wrap her in it.

I don’t know what to do.  So I move into the pain.

My knees give and as I sink to the floor I hear all the heartbreak being torn from my body. And I cry.

I cry because for the past 11 years this furry little cat has been my ‘beautiful monster in the cupboard’.  She has been my husband’s little princes.

I cry because Cleopatra was probably one of the most beautiful cats who have ever lived, but the world never got to see her beauty because she was terrified of life and so she lived in my bathroom cupboard.  The only people who were ever allowed to touch her were myself and my husband.

I cry because she was my daughter.  I have seen her grow from a tiny little bundle of fur into a beautiful young woman.  I held her when she was pregnant and stayed by her side when she gave birth.  I saw her sadness when her kittens found new homes.  I saw her fear growing as she got older and her world became smaller and smaller until all that was left was the bathroom cupboard.

I cry because I love her.

Eventually the vet comes back.  I don’t know what to do so I say “Can we leave her in the blanket?  I don’t want her to get cold.”  He nods his head and says “Few have the courage to do the right thing.”

Few have the courage to do the right thing.  But I have to be courageous.  Because I am a warrior.

The path of the warrior is not an easy one.  And sometimes it means following the pain so that we can understand the lessons that lies hidden underneath.

As I look around the world I see so many people hurting.  But they don’t have the courage to go into the pain and so instead they try to numb it with alcohol or drugs or food or sex or over work.  Society is teaching us that pain is a bad thing to be avoided at all cost!  Yet I have learned in my life that pain, both physical and emotional, is a master teacher who provides me the opportunity to become stronger.  And that strength is needed to have the courage to stand up in this world and speak our truth with honor.

One of the most profound lessons I’ve ever learned is that our outer world is a reflection of our thoughts, both conscious and unconscious.  The reason why most people refuse to embrace this truth is because of the power that it places in our hands!  Indeed, we are the co-creators of our lives.

While life is wonderful and things go our way this power is easy to embrace.  Yet when times get tough we stubbornly refuse to find the truth in this because it hurts like hell!  Instead we blame the world at large, the government, the economy, our family, the availability of drugs, war, poverty, the list is endless.

As entrepreneurs we experience pain on a  regular basis.  After all, when starting a company, we are birthing a dream, and we raise that dream as if it is a child.  And that child needs to learn how to walk, and fall, and get scraped knees, and get criticized by others – and that hurts.  Sometimes we close that big deal and we are euphoric in our power.  Other times the deals go sour, the bank accounts run on empty and the pain is immense.  We lie awake at night wondering how we are going to turn this around.  Sometimes we have to let our employees go – and that hurts!!  As entrepreneurs we have got to learn to move into the pain, to learn the lessons hidden underneath so that we can heal the negative beliefs and move forward to prosper!

I don’t mean to make this sound like an easy process.  It’s not.  For one thing I know I first have to experience the pain.  I have to allow my body to feel it.  I have to allow my body and my mind to go down into the dark and to be immersed in this.  There always comes a time when I simply can’t bare the pain anymore and that is when I reach out to the Universe for strength.  This is when I hand over to God and ask for the lessons that I need to learn in order for me to move back into the light.  I ask, I trust, I let go.

And the answers always find me.  Not immediately, but when I’m ready.  Sometimes it takes days.  Sometimes it takes months.  Some of my greatest answers have taken years to find me.  But they always do.  In all honesty, most of my insights have always happened whilst I was training.  It still does.  Ask, trust, let go.

I believe that as entrepreneurs we have chosen to be warriors!  We have chosen to walk a path filled with challenges that can make us stronger, so that we can lead the way for others.

I’m sharing this experience of my personal loss with you today to encourage you to move into the pain and uncover the learning so that you can become stronger and walk in this world the proud warrior that you were born to be.  Warriors cry because they are brave enough to feel pain.  Warriors don’t try to numb the pain with external drugs which will eventually lead to nothing but death.

warrior_cat-HDThe loss of Cleo still sits heavy in my heart.  But she has reminded me to follow the pain.  She has reminded me to never waste my life and my message by hiding in the cupboard.  To rather take the punches along with the hugs because that is how I know I am alive!  She has given me the beautiful insight that it is my soul that holds my body upright, and that my soul is more powerful than any bone or muscle.  My soul burns with passion and that passion is what drives me forward every single day.  My body is simply the vehicle that takes me around.  She has reminded me that at the end of the day, my soul is energy and energy is eternal.  Therefor Cleo is eternal.

Walk proud in the halls of Valhalla my brave cat warrior.  For you have brought so much goodness to my life and I am eternally grateful to you.  And in celebration of your spirit, today I will walk with honor.

Viking prayer

The Silent Warrior – Out of the mouths of babes

This is my personal truth.

When we learn to stay open to the input of the Universe, whilst staying focused on our goals, some pretty amazing things come our way.  This is how I found myself at the Suits and Sneakers event last Thursday night to be inspired to a new level of learning.

As most people were sitting in the audience intently listening to the words, I was listening to what was not being said.  In fact, I was observing mastery in action from some pretty young people who challenged me to raise my game!  I must be honest, before this event I had never heard of Mark Sham or Brent Lindeque and as I sat studying them I was truly touched by Mark’s passion and Brent’s compassion (he is like the male alter-ego of Mother Theresa), which combined was moving in excess of a thousand people within 40 minutes.  Brilliant!!

Brent Lindeque

As a large portion of my client base consists of entrepreneurs who focus on wealth creation, some of my favorite books are Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill, as well as Leveraging the Universe by Mike Dooley (I highly recommend you read them).  And here on stage, was the theory in action!

Both these guys have a very clear purpose and a burning desire for a specific outcome.  Both of them know the impact they wish to create, they take massive amounts of action, and then they trust the Universe to come to the party and create some magic!  And believe me, it is some pretty impressive magic.

But it goes further than this!

As I was leaving I had the opportunity to shake Brent’s hand and I thought to myself, how can such a young person be so brave and be so visible in the world to make a change, when most of my generation seems to be hiding?  And by default, why am I not making the impact he is?  This stayed with me all night.  Truth be told I didn’t sleep much after the event and when I heard an owl at 2 am, I knew that something had shifted for me.  I understood that wisdom is knowledge in action, and that our youth was teaching us this valuable lesson.  I need to use my knowledge and take more action to add more value to your life!!

As I went out for my run Saturday morning, I noticed how clean the gutters were from all the rain the night before.  It felt amazing to see the beauty in my neighborhood again.  As I carried on though, I could see the individual bottles and pieces of paper lying next to the walls and on the pavements.  I think what really hit me was the fact that I know our outer world is a reflection of our inner world.  And for the first time I understood that a lot of my stress, and the tension, disease, irritation and general feeling of discontent which I am experiencing from people in general, stems from our dirty suburbs.   The question popped into my head – what would Brent do?  And so the One Bag Nominations were born!

 

Let’s be honest, picking up rubbish is NOT the most glamorous way to spend the cool-down session of my run.  And I won’t gross you out with the details of what I picked up.  But every item which I picked up and threw into a bin, left me with a tremendous sense of achievement and contribution.  Because I know countless people will be driving to work feeling a little lighter, even if they don’t know why.  I will never again go on a run without picking up some of the litter and cleaning up my world!

Once again I was able to align my life purpose with my goal of completing the Sky Run which in turn increases my dedication.  I hope you are starting to see the bigger picture…

spider webLife is like a huge spider web.  When we are busy weaving it we tend to only see what is right in front of us.  But God, the Universe, your Higher Power, whatever you believe in, sees the bigger picture and how it is all interconnected.  My purpose, my goal, my learning, the people I get to meet on my journey, the people I get to inspire along the way, and in my own little way, I am leaving the world a better place.

 

You were born to be a warrior.  To live in purpose and honor.  To contribute to the world in your unique way.

Join me in making our world a cleaner place, because God has made it breath-takingly beautiful!

Walk with honor.

 

The Silent Warrior – A letter of gratitude to you

This is my personal truth

Dear Fellow Traveler

I see you and I am in awe of you.

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I see you wake up some mornings, still exhausted.  Finding it so hard to remember your purpose, your drive.  Yet you keep going.  Your feet hit the floor, your legs carry you to the kitchen, you make a cup of coffee.  Your will-power to keep going is astounding.  Thank you for showing me perseverance.

 

 

 

Isn’t it crazy how we have created a society where happiness seems almost elusive for most people?  And yet, you find moments of laughter and pure joy no matter where you are.  You still remember how to smile, and when you do so, you brighten up the day for everyone around you.  You make me smile.  You show me how to sing and dance with abandon!  The twinkle in your eyes light up my existence.  Thank you for showing me joy.most7

 

Some days you look in the mirror and you cringe.  You judge the extra weight that you carry around your belly or the over-sized clothes that you use to hide your beautiful curves.  Be gentle with yourself today.  Instead of judging the weight, try to understand the purpose of it.  What is the story it is telling you?  About the pain that it is trying to protect you from.  About the danger that it tries to hide you from.   Be gentle.  Understand.  Forgive.  I do.  Thank you for showing me vulnerability.

You deal with so much stress on a continuous basis.  You carry so much responsibility, not just for yourself, but for those who choose to be in your life in whatever role or duration of time.  You carry this in silence.  Not wanting to share your burden.  Not wanting to make it harder for those around you.  You are strong beyond even your own imagination.  You just don’t see it the way I do.  Thank you for showing me courage.

 

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There are times when I know you have come to the end of the line and you are completely at a loss of where to from here.  In a world that demands perfection you reach a point whereby you acknowledge to yourself that you are not the Superman of your childhood and that sometimes so much shit hits the fan that all you can do is crouch down and cover your head.  Thank you for showing me humbleness.

 

 

At times the pain becomes almost unbearable and your body seeks release through the out-pour of tears and you scream your torment to the Universe!  Yet you never throw that excruciating pain my way.  Instead you wait for the storm to pass, you find strength through a higher power and you show me the stars shine even in the darkest night.  Even in your time of hurt, you find ways to support others.  Thank you for showing me compassion.

 

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My Dear Fellow Traveler, I see you and I am in awe of you.  You are the reason I get up every day.  You are the reason I continue to grow as a person, as a coach, as a mother, as a wife, as a daughter, as a sister, as a friend, as a human.  You are the inspiration in my darkest hours.  You are the reason I continue to seek out my fears.  You are the reason I keep believing in the good of humanity.  Because no matter how bad things look, there is always a magnificent light within you which I see.  And I am in awe of that light.

My Dear Fellow Traveler – Thank you.most1

 

 

Why on earth are you setting goals?

This is my personal truth.

I find it fascinating how society keeps taking powerful tools and turning them into ways to keep the masses average.   One of the ways in which this is done is through information overload partnered by a lack of wisdom.

Confused? Let me explain through example.

Goals – we’ve all heard how important they are to set and that this is what sets the elite performers apart from everyone else.  So everyone got onto the band wagon and started setting goals.  They started off with really big goals, but few managed to achieve them.  So the goals got smaller, and still people are not achieving them.  Why?  Because mostly people are setting the wrong goals for the wrong reasons and therefore lack the motivation to push through the hard times.

In my opinion the purpose of setting a goal is to change an aspect of my life and the person who I am today compared to the person I will become when I achieve my desired outcome.

So first of all, it is personal!  It is never about pleasing other people.  It is never about living some else’s life for them.  It is about me, my life, and my personal growth.

Second, you can’t possibly set 5 to 10 life-changing goals and expect to put in the work that it will take to achieve them all at the same time!  My magic number is 3.  One is always physical (my body is my play-ground for mental toughness), one is always around my profession (turning my craft into mastery), and one is always around love (with all the magnificent people in my life, as well as my relationship with myself and the Universe).

Third, a goal is non-negotiable.  The pain of not achieving it should outweigh any pain that you will go through on your journey to achieve it.  And make no mistake:  magnificent goals means challenge and growth which always entails some measure of pain and discomfort.  If you are willing to walk away from a goal, then rather don’t set it!

Fourth, a goal is specific down to a T!  Please stop with the fluffy goals that mean Jack sh*t!  “I want to be in better shape” is not a goal!  That is you wanting to beat yourself over the head every time you get onto a scale or look in a mirror.  What does that even look like?  Or feel like?  And if it is going to be life-changing, why are you not in better shape already?  What do you value more than being in better shape that you got out of shape in the first place?  What is the real goal?

I don’t mean to sound cruel, but cruel is setting goals that you think will make you a better person but that has nothing to do with your purpose or true values. So you end up setting these goals that you have no true desire in achieving only to tell your subconscious mind “see, I told you you’e a failure!”  Stop being cruel to yourself.  Set specific goals that you WILL achieve no matter what and change the voice in your head.

We are officially half-way through the year.  There is no better time than today to review your goals and see if they really matter.  If you are stretching, aching and growing in your journey to achieve them.  Review your goals today, and if you are not working on them every single day, if they are not important enough to sacrifice for, change them!

If you are feeling stuck and would like to discover if elite performance coaching can take you to the next level in your life, I invite you to book a free discovery session here.  I stand for the goals that will change your mind, your body, your business, your relationships, your life.

Walk with honor!

The Silent Warrior – Finding your Big Why

This is my personal truth.

Can you imagine going to war, preparing yourself to die, without understanding your purpose?

Why would you keep fighting, even when you bleed, when the pain is ripping through your brain, when all seems lost and it would be so easy to just lie down and wait for it to be over?  Why would you keep fighting to your last breath without a big why?

The life of an entrepreneur is very similar to that of an ancient warrior.  If you don’t know why you are doing this in the first place, chances of failure is good.  That is because the life of an entrepreneur consists of many battles.  Of facing the possibility of failure, the death of your company, the pain of unpaid bills, the continuous fight when all around you business are closing down.  Only the entrepreneurs with purpose will survive.

My mentor once said that ‘your business is in service to your mission (not the other way around)’…  Those who start with ‘the why’ live an inspired life and have the ability to inspire those around them.’

That is because your why becomes this burning desire inside of you that drives everything that you do relentlessly.  A desire that refuses to give up no matter how hard circumstances may appear.  A desire that makes sense of chaos and when people question your truth.

To find your big why, take some time out to answer the following questions:

1. When you think about being in service to others through your work, what really lights you up?

2.  What comes most naturally to you that you absolutely love doing?

3.  What could you do for free all day long and never notice the time?

Be honest with yourself.  So often we are conditioned to give the ‘right’ answers to please others thereby missing the opportunity to discover our authentic self and the gifts we were born to share with the world.

Pleasing others = mediocrity.  Sharing our true gifts with others = empowerment and elite performance.

Once you have identified your three passions, see where they overlap.  What is the theme that comes to light – that is your big why.  Once you are able to articulate your purpose, it will drive you relentlessly, it will form the anchor for your business, and always keep you centred.

Today is your chance to listen to your inner warrior.

Find your big why.

Walk with honor.