In retrospect…

Last month of the year…
Last month of the decade…

What has changed?
In you?
In your world perspective?
In your relationship with yourself?

How have you evolved as a woman?
Have you stepped into your empress energy?
Your Alpha Female identity?
Or are you still showing up as Cinderally scrubbing toilets,
waiting for her knight in shining shackles to replace the Toilet Duck grasped in your fingers with a diamond ring?

Have you evolved in your love and appreciation for yourself?
Have you taken the time to get to know yourself,
the pieces of you that nobody else has ever seen,
and have you compassionately reintegrated those parts which you’ve abandoned in the desperate plea to be liked and accepted and, in a warped fairy tale way, loved by another?
Or are you still walking around waiting for someone to ‘complete’ you?

Have you finally taken full responsibility for your life,
for every relationship in your life,
every experience,
every tear,
every smile,
Or are you still pissed at the world for NOT treating you like a precious princess wrapped in cotton,
for NOT saving you from yourself,
for NOT rescuing you from the abuse and the humiliation and the bankruptcy and the failures and the heart-ache and the addictions and the binge-eating and the blah blah blah?

Have you owned your worth
understanding that there’s nothing left for you to prove
that you can simply BE yourself
and receive all your desires,
allowing yourself to have fun in the co-creative process of life?
Or are you still working yourself to the bone,
complaining about inequality even though you are the creator of it in your experience,
still thinking there’s shit you HAVE TO do or SHOULD DO in order for you to live an incredible life?

What has changed?

Because in truth,
when I look at how majority of women are showing up,
the answer is very little, if anything at all.

They’re having the same old conversations about the same old shit.
They’re still convinced they have to be available for everyone else first,
take care of everyone else first,
even though they themselves can hardly get out of bed in the mornings,
and then they wonder
why the fuck
women are still seen as the weaker sex.

It’s not that we’re weaker!
It’s because most women want to help and save
instead of respectfully challenging stories and empowering each other
to get their shit together and


They want to give everything away for free
because apparently it’s the ‘right’ and ‘loving’ thing to do
and in the process they are robbing others of actually receiving transformation as there’s no exchange of energy thereby not creating any space for the new.
Stop that shit and


They want a man to love them so much
that he ‘needs‘ her.
Oh it sounds so romantic in a country song:
You make me happy,
You are my world,
You make me sad,
Now you’re making me mad,
Oh no,
Don’t leave me,
OMG I’m falling apart,
I can’t cope without you,
NOOOOOOO come back,
you’re breaking me,
Please darling
I’ll do anything you ask of me.

the moment anyone says you make them happy
walk the fuck away
for as they make you the source of their joy
they will make you the cause of their pain.
The moment anyone says they need you
run the fuck away
for it means that they’ve abandoned a part of who they are
to make space for a part of who you are
and this crippling of the self will keep both of you locked in a ridiculous three-legged race that nobody can win.

It’s time for you to be bring ALL OF YOU to the table
where the only king who can dine with you
will have to bring ALL OF HIM to be your equal.
This is when you get to enjoy the feast of each other without needing another to be your better half or make you feel better.
It’s time to release codependency and


What has changed for you this last year,
this last decade?

In one word for me:

I’m not the woman I was a decade ago or even a year ago.
I came to the understanding that for me to start receiving new results in my life,
to start thriving,
to do the work I came here to do,
to be the change I desire to experience in the world,
I would have to release any need for egotistical fungus
including the need to be right
including the need to be validated by others
including the need to be accepted by the tribe
including the need to save face.

I had to be willing to strip myself down to my very core
to change the way I think, the way I connect to my Source, the way that I move my body, the way I speak my truth,
releasing cultural beliefs and upbringing
and from a space of pure love
a deep desire to empower
and to be the instigator of a thrive evolution
reclaim my Alpha Self

Can you say the same,
and if not,
when will you?

For death is inevitable.
Tick tock hunney.
Thrive doesn’t come from doing the same old shit as before.

Live with honour and badassery,


Anel is the Instigator of a Thrive Evolution for Alpha Females.

Her work is aimed at empowering women to trust themselves and their intuition, reclaiming their authentic voices, and creating a life they’re madly in love with.

Through enhanced self-love, self-worth and self-confidence they know the satisfaction and pride of a woman who lives unapologetically aligned with her purpose.

Those ready to step up and receive support on their journey are invited to connect through a potential partnership consultation.

✔︎ For more pockets for introspection follow her here ☛ Anel Bester

✔︎ To learn more about her thrive evolution visit here ☛

✔︎ For video content subscribe here ☛  Home of the Alpha Females