Feeling guilty for having too much fun???

Let me ask you this Darling:
Where are you still shrinking from ecstacy?

Where are you still cutting pleasure short
because you think you can’t possibly cope with THIS MUCH orgasmic connection with the source within you?

Where are you still rushing your enjoyment
so that you can get back to
back to the salt-mines so that you can ‘deserve’ the next finger of stimulation?

Right now,
I put it to you,
that the only true purpose of your life,
the one that’s actually going to change the game for humanity,
is to increase your capacity for joy and pleasure and fun
by having more joy and pleasure and fun!

It’s being on a MISSION to have so much adventure and delight
that the cult of mediocrity look at you in complete horror and indignation because
who the fuck do you think you are to be having such a good time
whilst everyone else is choosing an existence of suffering?

Does this shock you?


Because you think that the more we focus on the truly horrible things happening, the better it will get?
Because you think that being committed to increasing the energy of love and joy and abundance on this earth-plane somehow makes you a bad person?

Does this make any logical sense at all????

Can we agree that everything is energy and what you focus on grows?
It multiplies as you’re feeding it MORE energy through your attention.
From this space,
can we agree that it’s possible that the reason the piles of shit is multiplying faster than a bowl of popping corn is because soooo many people are focused on it?
In fact, the masses are hypnotised by the drama. They’ve developed an insatiable appetite for it! Often lashing out at those who DON’T post negativity and pity-inducing “oh woe is me” bull-balls on social media!
Yes, I understand that most believe focusing on the problem and highlighting it, will make it better.
I understand that it comes from a good space.
But Sunshine, you’re feeding the wrong fucking beast!

You truly want to bring positive change?
Then focus on the solution!
Focus on how you DO want to experience it.
Talk about it as if it already is and it will become faster. Post about what you desire to experience and it will become faster.
Focus on the better!

Let’s talk about being a bad person.
Oh and make no mistake – someone went to town on this one taking every possible point of FABULOUSLY YOU, dipping it in a barrel of shame and feathering you with labels that will crush the most resillient of spirits.

Apparently your body is a thing to be tortured, humiliated, hidden, shut down, become nothing more than a breeding factory and if that part is not working properly or you’re choosing NOT to utilise that particular functionality, you’re broken!
God forbid you should celebrate the magnficent vehicle you’ve chosen to have an experience with in this time-space reality.

Apparently your emotions are demons that need to be drugged and chained and rejected for they make you unpredictable, unreasonable, unbreakable in their efforts to domesticate you.
God forbid you should welcome the powerful messages they gift you with regards to how your thoughts are currenlty creating your life.

Apparently we should feel happy, but not too happy and only when appropriate.
We shouldn’t feel too sad because then we’re not functioning well enough for the machine so they’ll put your arse on a couch and feed you drugs.
We shouldn’t feel angry becuase that shit just looks ugly on a woman and makes you crazy and out of control.
We DEFINITELY shouldn’t feel horny because that makes us sluts and whores and inappropriate.
In other words Darling, we’re pretty doomed as bad to the bone because you and I both know we feel ALL of this and a gazillion other emotions ALL THE TIME.

The suffering most people are experiencing is the suppression of emotion, never allowing themselves to FULLY release INTO the emotion, so they can allow it to move THROUGH them, leaving behind beautiful indicators of thought.

Love and joy and abundance IS YOUR NATURAL STATE!
You can NEVER have TOO MUCH of this and the more people who choose this more of the time, the more we elevate the energy on this gorgeous planet.
Let those who revel in suffering, vengence, resentment, sour-pusses, have their preferred life experience.
You get to have YOURS.

I’m proposing that it’s time for Alphas to liberate themselves from the mundane thoughts leading to mundane beliefs resulting in mundane lack-lustre existence.
It’s time for those who lead from heart, those who are willing to stay curious, committed to continuous growth and expansion and elevation,
to have the boldness to thrive and

This will only happen when individuals stop taking responsibility for the inner workings of others,
which when you think about it,
means you want dominion over another,
and instead,
bring it home
to themselves.

Taking complete responsibility for your life experience by reclaiming your total control over
your thoughts
your feelings
your actions.

Death might be inevitable,
thriving is your birthright and natural state,
yet in a culture of average,
you will be asked to choose it for yourself.

Live with honour and badassery,

** FREE training: “The CAA Methodology” – 3 steps to creating your life of thrive.

By investing 30 minutes of focus and attention, you can receive ongoing transformation in return.

Get all the details https://anelbester.com/caa/

Isn’t it time to reclaim your YES and your NO?

The intention behind this piece is NOT about stating a new universal truth making all other truths wrong!
It’s simply sharing my new truth,
designed from decades of immersing myself into my life-experience, becoming the oberserver of how my thoughts create my reality, and choosing a story that feels better to me.
You get to choose for yourself.

Two of the most powerful words in your vocabularly:

These words are instrumental in what you are creating in your life.
It’s also the two words
which most women have given away for others to decide when they are used,
and in the process
given away their power.

Swallowing their true desires along with the thick bile,
the sickness they feel,
from the imprisonment within their own minds.

Creating cages in which to perish,
slowly fading away into nothing but a shadow of themselves.

Well Sugar,
I’m here to tell you that the prison is of your own making
and it’s time to choose:

Will you continue to exist in suffering
or will you finally
Fuck This Shit,
shattering the illusion of disempowered status

RiseAlphaFemales ?

This is going to sound cold,
but honestly,
enough already of the motherfucking pity party.

Pretending that you don’t have what it takes to be phenomenally successful in EVERY dimension of the word as you’ve finally left behind your toxic relationships.
When you’ve endured more pain in the last few decades than most will ever be able to imagine in a life-time.

I know you’re tough AF.
Resillient to a fault.
And in the process of living in an abusive relationship,
you’ve managed to create the mind of a world-class fighter.
Don’t you DARE insult yourself by pretending that you don’t know if you’ve got what it takes to get from where you are to where you desire to be.

Break down.
All the way down.
let it all out,
and then,
once you’ve spent all the years of hurt,
you go within
to your heart
to your soul
and you fucking


Start saying YES to your true self and start saying NO to your bullshit stories of weakness.
Weakness does not exist.
It is simply the absence of faith.
It’s the disconnection from who you truly are.

Pretending that love means you have to stand by another regardless of their personal choices.
Pretending that love means you have to WORK at fixing yourself, the other person, the relationship.
Pretending that it’s your responsibility to walk the long walk of martyrdom in the name of love.
Pretending that sticking it out somehow makes you a saint.

I’m putting it to you Darling,
that the moment you think the other person should change,
it is in fact YOU that need changing.

You need to change what you are saying yes to,
and what you are saying no to.
YOU are the one tolerating bullshit.
YOU are the one showing up as a slave-girl and then expecting others to treat you like a queen.
I know,
that one stings like a wasp-bite.
And it will also set you free from the illusion of victimhood.

Start saying YES to radical self-love, self-acceptance, self-appreciation and self-respect and start saying NO to codependency.
Say YES to standards of excellence for and of yourself and start saying NO to mediocrity.

Pretending that there’s an inequality between the sexes
and that men are to blame
when you and I both know
that NO MAN has the true power to oppress a woman.

Yes, they might be physically stronger than most of us,
but mentally we are equal,
and emotionally we are stronger,
therefor the balance is restored by our very natures,

I’m proposing that the oppression of women
is created through the narrative of women
started by god knows who.
Handed down through the generations
and the poor bastards are simply pawns on our board of inequality.

Oh I know this is probably not going to be received well.
My ‘hate-club’ will grow tremendously,
and that’s just perfect.
Because NOT choosing to raise this controversial issue
means that I would be another silent witness
and I might as well go home.

That’s not what I signed up for.
I am the instigator of a thrive evolution for Alpha Females who are ready to liberate themselves,
and those choosing to cling to what ‘was’
will not choose a new thrive!

You can sit and recite every single piece of history
for all of time and memorial
and my question to you will be this:
To what purpose???

What does the rehashing of events contorted by the story-tellers do in changing the current status?
Instead, it sweeps up resentment, anger and a hunger for vengence,
the witch-hunt has simply changed from women to men,
and all of your evidence of validation actually means jack shit sister.
Because you’re still stuck in the story and you will ALWAYS find evidence for your beliefs.
You’re still a prisoner in your desire to be ‘right’ and to ‘fit in’ and have a sense of ‘belonging’
rather than a desire to be truly happy!

Does thinking of inequality make you feel good?
Does saying that you’re limited by your genitals make you feel good?
Does complaining about the unfairness of it all make you feel good?

If it does, by all means, you keep chanting my friend.
And if it doesn’t, stop it!

Start saying YES to a story that makes you feel FABULOUS
and NO to reciting a story of old that has caused so much misery.

Here is what I choose to beleive and find evidence of:

YOU are magnificence in human form.
And so is everyone else.
Celebrate this magnificence every day in every form and you will experience the depth of beauty available to us at this time.

YOU are powerful beyond comprehension and nobody has power over you, you can simply suppress your own.
Liberate yourself by changing your stories and operating from a space of what feels good and you will move through your day delighted by miracles unfurling left right and centre.

YOU are love in your essence.
And so is everyone else.
Choose to operate from love, leading from this energy, creating from this energy, sharing from this energy, and you will blossom and bloom at every age.

YOU have a heart.
And so does everyone else.
Connect to the heart of every person and your life will be beautifully supported by the most amazing human beings alive at this time.

In other words Alpha,
start becoming conscious of your language,
especially when it comes to the words you speak in silence.

Cosciously choose your yesses and your nos to move you towards a state of ecstacy.

Say what you mean.
Mean what you say.
And do as you say.

For death is inevitable.
Thrive is a conscious use of language.

Live with honour and love,


** FREE training: “The CAA Methodology” – 3 steps to creating your life of thrive.

By investing 30 minutes of focus and attention, you can receive ongoing transformation in return.

Get all the details https://anelbester.com/caa/

Do you have the audacity to stop treating the symptoms and go straight to the root cause?

It was fucking insane!
One moment I’m a badass cyclist,
kicking arse in the pack.
The next,
I’m vomitting from excruciating pain one kilometre into a stupid training run.

This started a fascinating journey of medical professionals
placing wedges in my shoes
poking needles into uncomfortable places
drugs to keep me from passing out whilst training
hours and hours on hard tables contorting my body.
You name it,
it was poked, stroked and strapped.

This went on for months.
All the time
I continued training and preparing for the race.

As I sat on my bike to have it set up for my new tri-bars,
the technician stood behind me,
watching the mechanics of my body to ensure my seat was at just the right height and angle when he asked:
“Is your left hip hurting?”
I was a little confused at this question as about the ONLY part not hurting, was my left hip!
In fact,
all the pain I experienced was on the right side of my body.

Which all the medical professionals had been treating.

Here’s the thing,
every professional I went to listened to my symptoms,
in the process forming a construct in which to treat me,
one symptom at a time.

The technician,
without knowing any of this,
had an unobscured view of my body.
The ONLY thing he was interested in
was how I moved in order to get me to a space of efficient effort and energy expenditure.
He followed the lines from where my feet touched the peddals,
the working of my legs,
the engagement of my core and hips,
all the way to my fingers on the bars,
and picked up there was a break in the energy-flow in my left hip.
The MRI confirmed that THIS is where the obnoxious little bone is sticking out.

One of the most transformational lessons I’ve learned in my life
is to differentiate between symptoms and the origins of contraction in well-being.

Everything is energy,
energy flows.

When there is a lack of flow
you have to go find the place where it’s constricted.

Your life is all about your personal well-being.
Well-being referring to every single aspect of your life.
From relationships to money to business to friendships to lovers to health,
the whole caboodle.

Here’s what I desire for you to receive today:

The origin of any constriction
is you.

It’s your relationship with yourself.
It’s your stories about who you are, what you deserve, what you need to do in order for you to receive, who you are with, the work you’re doing.
It’s the degree of you remembering who you truly are.
Not the little human personality of you,
the true you.
The all-powerful creator of your experience.

It’s about truly aligning with the words you speak.
It’s about truly aligning with the actions you take.
It’s about taking the time to understand what you desire to align with in the first place.

THIS is where so many people are getting tripped over right now.
They don’t want to take the time to figure out what the hell they TRULY desire to experience in life.
let me take it a step back:
they don’t want to do the work to get to a space of radical
self-love and

Let me break this down even further for you today because honestly, until you GET this piece,
you’re stumbling around in the dark.

Self-acceptance :

The welcoming of every part of you that has ever been.
The supposedly good (or what others find good and pleasing in you),
the real good (connecting to the fact that you ARE the essence of what is good),
the bad (you know, the secretly judgmental bitch in you, the one who gets mad, the one who curses in private whilst sugar melts in your mouth in public),
the ugly (the codependent little girl seeking approval, the one who has a secret stash of chocolates under the bed, the abused you that felt too weak to leave, the broke you, the broken you). I mean you accept ALL OF YOU right here, right now, NOT once you’re done with therapy.

Self-appreciation :

Appreciating that every single thought you’ve ever had, every single experience you’ve ever had, every single word you’ve ever spoken, every single eccentricity that is you, has brought you to THIS moment in time so that you can choose the woman you desire to be from this point moving forward.
Without the diversity, the contrast, the joy, the pain, the failures, the wins, you would NOT be RIGHT HERE right now.
EVERYTHING happens FOR you.
In service to your best self.
You don’t have to change a single thing for you to live an extraordinary life moving forward.
It’s in the rejection of your life experience,
that thing they call regret,
that keeps you out of alignment with joy!
For it’s your life EXPERIENCE that is the source of wisdom Darling.

Self-love :

Love, the energy of abundance, the energy of growth, the energy of expansion, the energy of healthy boundaries, the energy of worth, the energy of value, the energy of receiving, the energy of upliftment, the energy of truth, the energy of beauty.
It starts with YOU.
It starts with allowing this energy to flow
INTO you,

in avalanches of exquisite joy and from this space it flows into the world around you!
And sure as fuck not from others.

Self-respect :

Being a woman of your word and first and foremost keeping your word to yourself.
It’s about being real with what’s truly important to you by questioning everything you ever have and ever will learn, going inside, connecting with your inner wisdom, and allowing yourself to receive and integrate that which aligns and without any need to explain or validate or make wrong for another, release the rest.
It’s about shutting out the voices of everyone else and living your life in such a manner that you go to bed proud every night of what you’ve lived today.

Answer me this:
how much of your TIME and ENERGY and RESOURCES are you dedicating to improving and deepening the relationship with yourself
compared to treating the symptoms in your life?
How often do you go to the mirror just so you can witness yourself and speak words of love to yourself
compared to how often you tell others you love them?

Let’s be honest here,
it’s easier to treat the symptoms isn’t it?
It’s more ‘normal’ and socially acceptable to invest in your business than in yourself.
I bet most people have never even looked in the mirror
and with deep and true connection
spoken the words
“I love you”

Have you?

This my Sweetheart,
is the difference between life and thrive.

For death is the only certainty,
thrive is a choice few will ever have the audacity to make.

Live with honour,

FREE Clarity Call? ☛ https://anelbester.as.me/receivingclarity

Ready to journal your way to clarity, alignment and action for results? ☛ https://anelbester.com/journal

To all the men I have, do and will love…

You’re going to have to put on your big-boy pants for this piece,
because I’m not talking to the little boy in you Darling,
I’m going straight to the heart of the king.

I’m not the kind of woman who looks around to see what’s being portrayed of the current situation in the world,
for the past few weeks EVERY SINGLE CLARITY CALL I’ve had,
has been with a strong, brilliant, beautiful woman
who has left an abusive marriage.
Some reached the point of barely escaping with her life.

Understand that I DON’T view these women as victims.
Fuck no,
they are ALPHA!
And as Alpha Females we came to this lifetime to bring change.
We are born warriors,
and as the diamond needs immense pressure to be formed,
we came with the knowing that we would be the few who would invite into our experience the most excruciating pain,
the pressure,
to remember
who we are
and once broken open
we rise.

But here’s the thing,
did not come to this world to do it on my own.
In fact,
I would not be where I am today
was it not for the incredible men in my life.

There were those who gave me opportunities to remember, reclaim and choose what I’m going to do with my heart.

I’ve experienced sexual molestation and rape – I choose to keep my heart open to man.

I’ve experienced physical violence, been stabbed, beaten, had my head smashed into a brick wall – I choose to keep my heart open to man.

Understand that when I say I keep my heart open to man,
it does not mean that I will tolerate or be available for the messed up shit those with no desire to work on themselves dish out.

I have received my learning and I now CHOOSE to only be available for the greatness in Alpha Men.

There are those who show me why I choose to keep my heart open.
There is my grandfather – A KING OF A MAN TAKEN FROM ME WAY TOO EARLY.
He set the stage,
he showed me,
the immense beauty and power that is possible when a man chooses to be a warrior with a heart so big it could envelop the entire universe.
There is my (step)father – A king of a man who shows me every day that family has fuck-all to do with genetics.
There are my incredible boys – king of men who choose to take what they’ve witnessed to honour and support the women of their generation.
There’s Gordon, Ewan, Clinton, Matthew, Patrick, Graham, Tom, Juergen, Dave, Paul, Jopie, Ash, Dov, Tristan, Joshua, Tim, Frank, Kim, Graeme, Sam, Stuart, and countless others, too many to mention all, who choose to show up every day as their best selves, and from this space, inspire me to raise my standards for myself.

This potential,
this king,
resides inside
I believe this with all of my being.

So when I see the statistics:
76% of suicides are men
85% of the homeless are men
70% of homicides are men
40% of domestic abuse are men
92% of deaths in the workplace are men

Because what the actual fuck guys????

what the actual fuck?

How much longer will we tolerate and allow beautiful men to get so caught up in the bullshit of a mundane working existence
allow and tolerate beautiful men to stay slaves to the system
allow and tolerate beautiful men to be duped by the online gaming mind-fuckery
allow and tolerate beautiful men to get so out of shape that they lose their core strength
allow and tolerate beautiful men to be castrated
allow and tolerate beautiful men to get so run down that they can’t think clearly for themselves
allow and tolerate beautiful men to get pulled into the pubs to drink to the point of stumbling around like a fool
allow and tolerate beautiful men to lower their standards to the lowest in the office
allow and tolerate beautiful men to set puny goals as that’s all that is expected of them by others who will NEVER honour their true hunger and potential for greatness?

And NO – I’m not saying we must save or rescue them.
I’m saying we have to lift our standards for ourselves EVEN HIGHER
for all ships will rise with the tide.

You think I went through all of THAT so that I could become a bitter, angry, resentful, ball-busting bitch?
You think I sit my sweet arse down every single morning for hours on end, doing the deep work, reprogramming my mind, reconnecting to my internal strength,
so that I can create another female cult who want to emancipate men?
You think I go out training to the point of vomitting, climbing mountains whilst pissing my pants in fear, face my greatest demons in the dark so that I can ‘prove’ to god knows who that I am better than men?

Goddammit man,
I’m choosing to do the work,
the real work,
to be my best self
every day
so that
I can walk proudly beside the Alpha Males in bringing back a standard of excellence
a new level of thrive
to the world of Alphas.


I know that if you’re reading this you’re probably one of the 1% in the 1% in the 1 fucking % already doing the work,
already showing up
already choosing to be your best self
simply because that’s who my energy attracts
and the others
will only get triggered and choose to get insulted by my words,
and from the depth of my soul,

But we have to do better guys.

Too many people are suffering on our watch.
Too many good people are losing the battle in our life-time.
Too many…

It is my intention that my undying and unwavering love and deepest appreciation of you
will be infused into every word in this piece
and that it will reach the core of you
the heart of you
the king in you
and inspire a spark of passion
such as you’ve never felt before
and from this space
you will raise your standards even higher
your expectations of yourself and those you choose to surround yourself with
and you will

For it’s going to take our combined efforts to bring the change the world is literally dying for.

It will not happen in isolation.
It’s time to remember who we are.
We never came to compete against each other.
We never came to break each other down.
We never came to be codependent on each other.
We never came to reign over each other.
That is NOT who we are!
That’s what the cult of mediocrity wants us to believe.

I see you.
I honour you.
I appreciate you.
I respect you.
I love you.

Live with honour,
for too many good men and women are dying
and they desperately need us to choose thrive once more,


PS: I’m stepping up for two men – if you know it’s you, let’s connect.

If I’m NOT your cup of espresso and you’re committed to your next level best self, the coaches I know, love and trust

Ash Playsted – nicknamed #thedragonslayer

Joshua Miller – Personal and Executive Master Certified Coach

Dov Barron – Full Monty Leadership

You are the creator of your relationships!

Depending on where you find yourself on your journey, this piece is going to feel anything from a punch in the nose to me french-kissing your soul…
Wherever you find yourself on this scale,
is perfect.

I’m calling for a revolution of free-thinking Alphas who understand that for them to live a life of thrive
they have to

What I mean by this is you have to start bringing your focus to the ONLY person who has any true control of your experience:

we can absolutely go into the stories of conditioning and how we are culturised to focus on everyone else
and how they really are being an asshole
and how they have a mental condition
and how they’re being self-destructive
and blah blah blah
but quite frankly
I don’t have the patience for that today
so I’m calling

Fuck a carousel,
I wish I had someone give it to me straight years ago.
Clearly I wasn’t ready to receive it,
clearly I had to go on my normal round-about way to get to where I am,
and what an adventure it’s been.

Filled with victimhood and blame and feeling like I was at the mercy of everyone else most days.
broken down,
pushed around,
and all the time
I kept thinking
‘If only they would change’
not understanding that they were simply reacting to the vibration I was excuding like a sewer.

Let me explain it differently:

You might have heard the story of the two wolves – how we each have a good wolf and a bad wolf inside of us,
and how we show up,
is dependent on which wolf we feed.

Well, the same applies in our experience of everyone else.
Each man has within him a king and a drunk and everything in-between,
each woman has within her a queen and a slave-girl and everything in-between,
and the side that shows up in your experience
is the one YOU focus on
and the one you allow yourself to receive!

Put THAT bit of self-responsibility in your pipe and smoke it!

I know
it feels like waxing your anus.

This is also the most empowering piece of information you will ever receive Darling.

For every relationship in your life
from your relationship with your colleagues
your staff
your clients
your children
your romantic partner
and everyone else,
YOU get to decide the EXPERIENCE you have
through what you focus on
and who you choose to be.

Have you ever noticed how a new relationship feels all fabulous and uplifting and fresh and wonderful,
and then,
slowly but surely
you start noticing parts in the other that’s not so pleasing to you?
Funny thing,
once you start spotting these,
the more they become.
Like gremlins multiplying in a rainstorm,
and the person ‘changes’ right in front of your eyes.

It’s not that those parts were absent in the beginning lover.
You simply didn’t FOCUS on them.
What you focus on grows
and it grows
because YOUR vibration around them starts to change
YOUR behaviour starts to change
and they’re simply responding to it.

The true alphas of this world,
the ones who are intollerant of disrespectful behaviour,
the ones who have epic relationships,
are the ones who are continuously working on being
They’re the ones who start each day with connecting to
who they desire to be
how they desire to show up
what they desire to experience
and they commit to staying connected to this vision as much as possible
even whilst storms rage around them.

Before you put on your Jesus-cloak
thinking you have to save everyone around you,
that’s not the point of this.

Once you connect to accepting, appreciating, loving and respecting YOURSELF
you accept, appreciate, love and respect the free will of every other person and their journey.

You are NOT responsible to change them.
You are NOT responsible to decide what is good for them.
You are NOT responsible to tolerate their disrespectful choices.
You are NOT responsible for how they feel.
You are NOT responsible for how they experience you.
Oh, and you don’t owe them anything either.


time for some practical action,
because just reading this and NOT implementing to create a new EXPERIENCE in your body, in your mind, in your life,
is a waste of your time.

Grab a pen and paper,
bring ONE person to mind that you care about yet having a challenging time with
and write 100 things that you appreciate about the person, what you like about the person, what you admire in the person.

Anel are you fucking crazy????

Yes, Sunshine.
You said you wanted to shift this shit.
Show me your level of commitment or just acknowledge to yourself that you want to remain stuck in this pattern.
Taking it to this level also ensures that you stop wasting your precious time on things that don’t REALLY matter to you!

Now do this every day for a week and let me know how your experience transforms.
And it WILL transform.
As your focus changes,
your thoughts change,
your energy changes,
so does your experience.
It’s universal law.

Want another one?

Let’s go to your romantic partnership (you can change romantic for any other form of partnership, the process is exaclty the same).

Step One – you have to get crystal clear on how you desire to experience your relationship.

Take your current partner out of the equation.
How do you desire to experience your relationship in terms of the type of conversations, how you desire to feel in his presence, how you desire to feel when he’s not around, what would fun look like in your relationship – be specific, what would epic sex look like in your relationship, what are your shared values, how do you spend Sunday mornings?
All of it.

Step Two – describe the king of a man in this vision.

I’m saying king because quite honestly Darling, if you’re settling for anything LESS than the king inside of a man, you’re settling for less than what is available to you which is how the cult of mediocrity is bred. The reason we have so many little toy-soldiers running around is because women are settling for it. Stop that shit!

Step Three – describe the queen of a woman who would be by this king’s side.

Describe her posture, her values, her conversations, her thoughts, her beliefs, how she eats, how she moves, how she makes love to her man, how she releases to her man in moments of ecstacy, the empire of impact she’s building.


Every day.
You will slide,
you will have to practice and readjust, reconnect, daily,
until one morning you wake up and you’re simply her.

The man next to you WILL be a king.
Whether that man is the same one you had,
or a new one.

Either way,
humanity wins
for they have received another queen raising the vibration for everyone.

Death might be inevitalbe,
thrive comes from taking full responsibility of your MIND.

Live with honour,

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The insanity of living to impress others…


who the hell are you trying to impress so much
that you’re willing to work yourself into a state of exhaustion
with little or no lasting satisfaction?

Who the hell are you trying to prove wrong
when they said you were not smart enough
not good enough
not enough
that you’re willing to live without an ounce of true integrity?

Who the hell do you think will finally give you the recognition
you so desperately crave

that you never received as a little girl
that you’re willing to cut off pieces uniquely you so that you will fit the picture they left in your ego mind?

Who the actual hell?

I’m sorry to tell you
but you’ll NEVER get what you want
because those you desire to put you on a Pedestal Of Awesome
are so lost themselves
you’re setting them
and you
up for failure.


This cycle of brilliant women walking around with socks in their panties
all the while allowing their pussies to go to sleep
through shame, pain and rejection
has got to come to an end now.

It’s up to US,
to reclaim our power
our freedom
our inherent creativity
which does not happen on the kitchen floor
or in the pages of technical how-to books
but from a space of absolute
deeply connected to our bodies
where minds are liberated
through #lifegasmic energy
and we

What I want you to finally understand,
not with your mind alone,
but with the blood flowing through your veins,
is that YOU are not the same as everyone around you.
As long as you’re playing by their rules,
even when their rules lead to socially approved success,
you are keeping yourself out of your true game.

And Darling,
is nothing short of

The challenge comes from your socialised thinking that has you convinced that for you to be a valuable asset in this world,
you have to do it the way everyone else is.
You have to finish school,
get the degrees,
commit to a career,
outworking everyone else to be recognised as a leader in your field,
and then give your best years to climbing that ladder,
popping out some babes along the way,
keeping your man happy,
make sure your tits don’t sag too much,
that your body stays firm and lean,
and try not to loose your shit in public okay?

Sounds funny,
yet this is exactly what’s going on.
I should know – I fell for that too 😉

And fell
and fell
and fell
until I fell so far down that I could no longer see a way out.

I got so disconnected from my body
that I lost all sensation from my shoulders to my knees,
You could touch me,
but unless I saw your hand,
I wouldn’t even know.
Exhausted beyond human capacity,
I shut down
to shut out the pain,
so my mind could somehow cope with getting up in the morning.

I got so disconnected from my soul
that I would go throughout my day
with no inclination of what I was FEELING.
I completely rejected my emotions as a sign of weakness
and in the process
I became another Stepford Wife.
Obedient and pleasing

I got so disconnected from my heart
my true desires
as a woman
as an artist
as a creative genius
that if you asked me what I truly wanted
I would simply recite the next set of goals that I had to achieve
thinking that if only I could reach enough goals
I would finally feel
satisfied and fulfilled and happy!

I honestly could not remember what the fuck happy felt like.

The secret knowing of this level of misery
scared the bejesus out of me.
My solution was to stay so busy,
so ‘in control’ of every little aspect of life,
that I wouldn’t have time to face the root of the problem.
I simply didn’t believe I would survive the enormity of my
I was terrified that if I slowed down even for a nano-second
the universe would come crashing down on me.

Guess what?
The universe is still operating perfectly
even as I got off the merry-go-round of insanity.

What I learned in the process is this:

1. This is MY life to create as I see fit and quite frankly the ONLY thing that truly matters, is that I live in a way that has me increase my well-being, my joy, my lifegasms.

Anyone who wants to sit and criticise me for my choices because it doesn’t fit into their little box of what a woman my age should be doing, should be saying, should look like, can kiss my sweet round little toe.I’m fucking worthy!

2. I’m fucking worthy!

I have nothing to apologise for. Nothing to prove. Nobody to impress.
The simple fact that I’m alive means I can be, do and have ANYTHING I desire with ZERO self-sacrifice.
In fact, it’s the other way around!
For me to RECEIVE, I have to allow myself to become MORE.
Isn’t that the best news ever???

3. With deep love and appreciation of everyone else, fuck ’em.

We’re so conditioned to think that we’re the source of happiness of others and this LIE is what keeps majority of people stuck in a crazy loop of self-destruction.
Their feelings of joy is THEIR responsibility and quite frankly, if they’re too fucking lazy to sort out the stories in their heads, it’s not my problem.
Does this make me selfish? Yup.
Does this make me an unsympathetic bitch? Yup.
Does this means I deeply respect the immense power of choice inside every human? You bet your sexy arse it does.

are you deeply and completely HAPPY?
Are you waking in the still of morn before the rest of the world has their alarms pull them from exhaustion to exhaustion,
feeling deeply satisfied and proud and delightfully anticipative of the day ahead?
Are you living life on your terms, from a space of deep connection with your body, your heart, using the power of your mind to ensure energetic alignment so that you increase your well-being?

If you’re not,
why not?
Who are you trying to impress?
Who are you trying to prove wrong?
Who are you desperately seeking recognition from?

Do you see the insanity of living from this space?
Are you ready to release this shit?
Will you be one of the very few
reclaiming themselves
and from a space of radical and unconditional self-acceptance, self-appreciation and self-love


For death is inevitable,
but until you exhale your final breath,
thrive is a choice available to you.

Live with honour,

FREE Clarity Call? ☛ https://anelbester.as.me/receivingclarity

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The only lies that matter, are the ones you’re telling yourself.

Time to stop the insanity.
Right here.
Right now.

I’m calling on the warriors.
Those who are pure of heart.
Those who are pure of intention.
Those who are

It’s our time
to reclaim ourselves
and to rise

I know,
I know,
that it’s easier said than done.
As we live as a generation where mediocrity seems to be winning the fight against excellence.

We live in a time when women such as us are raped, beaten and humiliated in an attempt to break us.
the joke’s on them Sunshine.
For they have broken us down to our bellies
and sobbing on the floor
we broke through the barrier that kept us seperated from our true power.
And when we rise
we are

We live in a time when our men are chained in the bullshit ideology of being responsible for feeble minded maidens and having to work in the system of average ladders,
too much to bear for anyone with honour and drive,
and in a desperate attempt to cope when the only skills they’re shown by their forefathers is violence and addiction
they are breaking down to their knees
sobbing in silence as they have to break through the barrier
that’s seperated them from their hearts.

And when they rise
they are

We cannot
in all good consciousness
stay silent
one more day.

We cannot
in all good consciousness
stay hidden
one more day.

We cannot
in all good consciousness
stay stuck in our insecurity
one more day.

For every day that you say
someone else will take the lead
you’re not ready
you’ll start next year,
next month,
next week,
you’re derelict of your true mission
and you might as well pull the plug
and flush your good intentions down the drain along with the sea of lies people tell themselves every single day to feel better about their cowardice whilst they willingly stay out of the game.

we ALL live in the constant presence of fear.
This is a good thing!
She is our guide.
The one who came here to lead us OUT of the line of average.
Find your fear,
listen to her call,
and instead of thinking about it,
LEAP into her arms.

Confidence is bred through action.
You will NEVER become more confident if you’re waiting for her to give you permission to act.
She is your REWARD for showing the fuck up
every day
and doing what you KNOW you’re meant to be doing
before you feel ready.

Oh yes,
I’m going there.
As an Alpha,
your life purpose was NEVER to raise codependent, helpless pups.
Your children should serve as your inspiration
to rise even higher
even faster
and for you to LEAD from the front
through your example
raising the next generation of kings and queens.
Make your children PROUD to be seen with you in public.

Here’s my message for you today Alpha,
it’s time to become ruthless
evicting average anything from your experience.

For you think it doesn’t matter,
but every little thing you hold on to
out of a feeling of guilt or shame or whatever they’re laddeling on you,
keeps you apart from the life available to you right now.

Every area that you settle for less than
has you stuck in an energy of

It’s time to step up
to where your desires reside.
You have to stop thinking from where you are
for those thoughts and beliefs simply won’t get you to where you want to be.
You have to stop making decisions based on your current environment
as it’s a product of your past decisions
which can only get you more of what is.
You have to find the brass ovaries
to make next level decisions
and then do whatever the hell it takes
to be that woman.

This is what I know with every fibre of my being:
You are free
You are powerful
You are good
You are love
You have value
You have purpose

And the moment you finally get this in your core,
you will


For death is inevitable.
Thrive only happens through conscious choice.

Live with honour and a dollop of badassery,

FREE Clarity Call? ☛ https://anelbester.as.me/receivingclarity

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Are you The Ugly Duckling?

it’s time to just own who the fuck you are
and RISE!

No more pussy footing around.
No more toeing the line.
None of that shit.

Just draw a line in the sand
and leap over with unshakeable faith
that you’ve got what it takes
to not only land on your feet
but to run like a powerful beast
because you ARE her.

There’s nothing left for you to learn.
There’s zero for you to prove.
There’s nobody left to impress.
There’s only
your true nature.


Right now
the average world designed to bond and domesticate
is literally ejecting Alpha Females
with the force of a fighter-plane seat.

Thank fuck for that.

Because quite frankly Darling,
it’s simply not worth suffering in silence one more day.

And average has NEVER looked good on you.

I get how terrifying it is
after decades of thinking you’re one of them,
pretending to be one of them,
as the story of The Ugly Duckling
feeling like a freak
an outcast
every time you dare open your mouth
your words grated their tits
and they lashed out at you.

When last have you read The Ugly Duckling?
Maybe it’s time to rewrite it as

The Alpha Female who thought she was a Maltese Poodle.

Called ugly as her hair was too thick, too straight, too dark.
Not pleasing to her masters’ touch who expected his bitch’s hair to be white, soft curls.

Constantly berated by her yapping ‘sisters’
who told her to stay in line,
to quiet down,
to be more obedient if she wants to receive a reward.
All the while,
longing to join the lone howl of the wolf in the dark of night.

Believing those who warned you to ignore the call,
that the monsters in the forest would devour you,
so you stayed inside,
when in fact,
the biggest monster of them all
was the one who shared your bed.

I know how embarassing it is
to admit to yourself
that you endured that shit for years
convincing yourself that there’s something wrong with you
because you think differently
you feel differently
you are different.
Worried about what everyone else will think about you, say about you.

listen to me closely,
Stop looking around,
march your sweet arse to the mirror,
take a good long look at the eyes you see before you
and make a vow
that YOU
will from this point forward
be the ONLY person you commit to 1 000 000 %

I suspect the reason chaos is raining down on alphas is because our ancestors and the souls of our children are done waiting for us to take it slow.
They’ve run out of patience with us floundering around.
So they’re turning up the heat,
shaking it up,
causing exquisite opportunity for conscious choice and change.

Life experience is breaking us the fuck down,
right down to our DNA,
so that
we can break loose from ALL the mind-fuckery
and choose
to reclaim ourselves proudly
for every single generation
from this point forward.

that you come from a long line of warriors
who walked proudly
defending excellence
from a space of absolute commitment and dedication to thrive.
The blood that flows through your veins
infused with the raging heat of passion and love
which will not be slowed down to the pace of the average
with their slugging movements and desire to sit around all day.

that you come from a long line of queens
who walked proudly
building their empires of impact
from a space of absolute commitment and dedication to thrive.
The blood that flows through your veins
infused with the conviction of abundance
which will not be reigned in by their belief in scarcity and celebration of struggle.


For our children are suffering to the point of self-destruction.
It’s not up to them to get their shit together.
It’s not up to them to create a better tomorrow.
It’s not up to them to live their dreams whilst their parents are showing up as ball-sacks.

This is my call and challenge to every Alpha reading this today,
whether male or female:
it’s time to rise!

It’s time to believe in yourself once more that you absolutely can be, do and have anything you desire and you don’t have to sacrifice yourself in the process.
It’s time to reclaim yourself as the powerful creator of your reality through focused thought and energy.
It’s time to walk proudly in the queen and king energy that has always been your birthright as you refuse to bow down to conformity and mediocrity, instead raising your standards for yourself thereby raising the standards of living for your children and your children’s children.

Nobody is going to give you permission Darling.
You’re NOT a child.
You’re NOT a domesticated bitch.

It’s time.
For tomorrow will be no different
unless you choose differently today.

You either reclaim and believe in yourself,
or you don’t.

Death is inevitable.
Will you be one of the very few who will choose thrive?

Live with honour,


FREE Clarity Call? ☛ https://anelbester.as.me/receivingclarity

Self-respect is not given, it is earned!

how we’re taught to focus on others
in a way to understand and to please and to be ‘valuable contributors’ to society.
Yet we’re never taught how to focus on ourselves.

From childhood it’s all about being aware of yourself in relation to an external environment and finding your place in the family,
your place in the social box based on your skin colour, your religious or spiritual affiliations, your economic class, your country of birth.

Most of which you have no say over as a young one.

like me,
you were curious and continuously questioning as very little of what you were told felt good and right,
you were probably branded as the black sheep, the rebel, stubborn, disrespectful, insulent little bitch.

So you learn to keep quiet,
keep your thoughts to yourself.
Tread lightly so as not to set someone off.

There’s an Afrikaans saying “‘n stil bek is ‘n heel bek”
meaning a quiet mouth won’t get broken by a back-hand as ‘discipline’ is rained down on you in the name of ‘love’.

Until one day
you wake up
stumbling into the bathroom
to find the eyes of a stranger staring back at you in the mirror
and she fills you with disappointment and utter disgust.

I remember that moment well.

I stood there,
where the fuck did I go?

For the reflection of what was supposed to be me,
was a docile,
on automation
just to get through another day
without being hurt again
by words of insult and humiliation
as fists stopped being effective a long time ago.

My truth is
that as long as you make ANY part of yourself wrong
as long as you make ANY good feeling thoughts wrong
as long as you swallow your truth to keep the peace
as long as you say ‘tomorrow’
as long as you break your promise to yourself because others should come first
as long as you move at the pace of another when it’s not the rhythm of your life
as long as you compromise
as long as you maintain the status quo and it sucks rotten toes
as long as you tolerate
as long as you kiss arse
you will
respect yourself
and once you’ve lost respect for yourself
you’ve lost the motherfucking game!

For an Alpha was born to stand
with a sense of honour and integrity
infused into her heart,
her core.

This is why we simply can’t tolerate being surrounded by the masses of sheople
so fucking noisy with their constant bleating
whining about how hard it is and how unfair it is and blah blah blah.
Their cacophony drives me insane!
They have no desire for true freedom, regardless of their words.
More concerned with their perceived ‘safety in numbers’,
expecting the system to protect them,
in return,
giving obedient service and a mundane existence.

We’re living in a fascinating time as alpha females were born into families where patriachy was preached and enforced NOT by men, but by women.
The last couple of centuries seeing women ‘giving away their power’ by clamping up their pussies, gagging their mouths, and suppressing their emotions through whatever form of ‘medication’ they can find.

Personally I’m beyond grateful to all the women who came before me,
who created this environment of contrast,
so that Alphas such as myself
could hit their rock bottoms,
and from the cold hard floor

I’m beyond grateful to all the boys-in-men-bodies who have chosen to walk this journey with me,
who created this environment of contrast,
so that I could experience the horror of self-abandonment,
and from a space of RAGE at myself

I said rage at myself.
I refuse to make ANY of my emotions wrong
as I’ve learned how to receive their messages and use their energy to shift myself into a state of
self-respect once more.

I want you to understand that self-respect is NOT given,
it is EARNED.

Every day.
By staying faithful to yourself first and foremost.
By keeping your word to yourself REGARDLESS.
By honouring your desires.
By claiming who you are and expecting to be treated as such.
By romancing yourself every single day,
always asking
‘will this increase my personal well-being’
and saying YES when the answer is YES
even in the moments of discomfort.
For that which increases your personal well-being
often requires you to step up
to where your next level of
fucking fabulous
It takes courage and courage breeds respect.

If they call you selfish,
if they call you disrespectful,
if they call you inconsiderate,
if they say you’re breaking them,
if they say you’re destroying them,
they’re simply not Alpha.

Lift your chin Darling,
and with love and appreciation for who you choose to be
and with love and appreciation for who they choose to be
walk away.

For death is inevitable.
There is no thrive without self-respect.

Live with honour,


FREE Clarity Call? ☛ https://anelbester.as.me/receivingclarity

The immense power of attraction which comes from a woman’s desire

Darling woman,
tell me your deepest desires.
Whisper them softly
so that the wind will carry them to my ears.

Words filled with the softest of sighs
of complete
and utter

Such as that moment of sweet release
into the strong arms of your lover
as he tenderly holds you
whilst raptures of delight course through your body.

Completely one with the pleasure that has always been
your birthright.

Do you even know what you desire?
Do you proudly own your desires?

Or have they become a well-kept secret
even from yourself?
As you’ve continuously been scolded for wanting more than your share.
More than you deserve.
In the process
rejecting not only that what you really want
but also

For a woman’s creative force does not come from doing more shit.
It does not come from taking more action.
It does not come from chasing more goals and accolades and noddy-badges.

we are designed to RECEIVE from a space of absolute honesty as to what our heart’s desire in order for us to feel MORE.
More pleasure.
More delight.
More excitement.
More joy.
More satisfaction.
More beautiful.
More adventurous.

most women have forgotten who they are.
They have rejected themselves in a desperate attempt to feel as though they belong,
as though they have value,
as though they have worth.

So caught up in all the social lies telling them they are the inferior sex and I’m not blaming men for this particular flavour of bullshit.
You and I both know that there is no inferiority and NOBODY can take away your power.
You willingly GIVE IT AWAY through your thoughts.
At the end of the day, you are the only person who can make yourself feel inferior.

Caught up in all the jealousy of other women who quite frankly DON’T want more and in their discontent with their unconscious choices, they lash out at those who dare show up as a queen.
I’m not blaming the bottom feeders as quite honestly, it’s YOUR responsibility to proudly walk the fuck away from them and to find those who celebrate your success as they celebrate their own.
Nobody can cut you down except yourself through your thoughts of shame and then bowing down to the level of others.

But more than any of this, women have become caught up in the BUSY. Believing that if they just do more, they will have more, feel more, be more.
THIS is the greatest lie of all time.
For the more you DO, the less you allow yourself to RECEIVE.
Your thoughts foggy with exhaustion, draining away your creativity so that you become robotic. Doing and saying the same shit over and over again, wondering when your results will finally change!
Your actions sluggish with next to no energy behind them, rendering them pretty much ineffective. Yet you continue on automatic as you’re terrified that if you dare stop, you simply won’t find the strength inside of you to get started again.
Your looks haggard, losing your attractiveness, losing your magnetism, losing YOU.
I’m not blaming your parents, teachers or preachers for this belief of having to prove your worth through endless effort so that you will get a reward,
some day,
probably once you’re dead.
NOBODY can make you feel unworthy of EVERYTHING your heart desires,
just because what you want is DONE and is GOOD.

Only YOU can tell yourself some story that has you feeling unworthy.

It all starts with CLARITY of desires Sweetheart.
The truth is that majority of women,
and men,
don’t have a frogging clue what they truly desire.

They think they want to be happy,
when they have a deep craving for satisfaction!
They think they want a lover,
when they have a deep desire for excitement!
They think they want more money,
when they have a longing for freedom, safety and choice!

And until you actually connect to what you desire,
you’re simply walking around blind-folded
bumping into things,
some of them pleasant,
most of them stinking and hard and knocking you on your arse.

What do you truly desire Darling?
What have you denied yourself because it feels like too much to ask for?
Where have you settled for good enough instead of insisting on fucking fabulous?
What do you think is bigger than you?
What will make you feel like an absolute goddess when you allow yourself to rise to the energetic vibration of where it exists?
What do you TRULY desire???

For it’s all available to you.
It’s all possible for you.
If it wasn’t,
the desire would not be yours to have.
The Universe is kind that way.

It all starts with Clarity of your Desires.

Are you one of the very few Alpha Females who carves out the time required for clarity?
Are you one of the very few Alpha Females who trusts not only her intuition but her emotions to guide her towards her desires?
Are you one of the very few Alpha Females who understands that everything you desire will only be received in the energy of the desire?

Understand that our lives are not created through our actions,
but through our minds,
and the REAL WORK is to train our thoughts in the directions of our desires.

What do you truly desire Alpha?

For death is inevitable,
thriving is the choice of those clear on their next desires.

Live with honour and a sprinkle of badassery,


FREE Clarity Call? ☛ https://anelbester.as.me/receivingclarity