Sometimes I wonder if I’m just bat-shit crazy for seeking out my pain.

It started 1 am.

I woke up for no apparent reason.

One side of my brain was trying to convince me that I’ve had a full nights’ sleep.

The other side made me aware of the fact that my eyes were hurting – a sure sign that I needed more sleep.

But sleep had left the building.

At first I lay there thinking of all the reasons I’m so grateful to be lying next to my peacefully sleeping husband.

Gratitude turned into irritation.

Why the fuck does he get to sleep whilst I’m lying awake listening to his even, deep, restful breaths.

I pumped his ribs “Turn on your side”

Which is code for “You’re snoring”

Except the poor bastard wasn’t snoring at all.  I was just feeling shitty.

Sometimes I can be real bitch.

Another 30 minutes passed.

No sign of the Sandman.


I have so much to do today I can’t afford to be tired!

By 2 am I gave up the fight, took my Kindle and sat in the lounge reading.

3 am I switched off the light again.

This is ridiculous!

5 am the birds started chirping on my phone – my alarm choice which normally makes me feel like Snow White.  This morning I could have taken out a gun and shot the happy little bastards.


What do I need?

I need my coach.  She’ll shift my sorry ass fast.  Somehow she always knows what to say.

And true to form she did – I was reminded in her very matter of fact tone that at any given moment I get to choose my emotions.  Sure, I could choose to feel sorry for myself and tell my body how exhausted I am and stomp around all day getting pretty much nothing done.


I could focus on my desired outcomes that I’m working on at the moment, figure out what I need to feel to succeed, and then just choose to feel it taking action that would enhance the feeling instantly.


It’s always so fucking simple.

I thought about it.

What do I need to feel to achieve my goals?

I need to feel focussed.

I need to feel badass.

I need to feel confident.

I need to feel connected to my purpose.

I need to feel energised.

I need to feel like ME!

What do I do to feel like me?

I hurt like a mother and push through it.

Shit, that sounds a bit insane right?

I can already hear the sirens pulling up outside my house.  Two men putting me in a straightjacket and loading me in the back of the white van to whisk me off to Crazy-Ville whilst I’m screaming like a wild animal black hair flying everywhere.

But it’s true.

There was a time when I would hide the fact that I intentionally use my body to unleash my emotions – and apparently I have a lot of pain.  The blessing of a life chosen in service of healing others and then raising my hand and saying “I’ll feel all the shit so I never lose my empathy”.

I use her to absorb the turmoil that’s going on in my head and to bring up that which I need to deal with for me to go next level.  I take her to my pain, my sorrow, my shame.  I take her and I give her all of it and then she gives it right back to me.

Every ounce of it.

She gives me more pain than most would ever dream of enduring.

She makes me choose.

Stop or push on.

And it is a choice my friend.

Every fucking time.

Whatever is happening in your life – you get to choose.

Do you choose to give up.

Do you choose to push on.

Do you choose to hide from the pain.

Do you choose to find the pain and work through it.

Do you choose to be normal.

Do you choose to be weird.

Do you choose to feel shitty.

Do you choose to feel badass howling at the moon.

This morning I chose to get up, lace up, and run to my pain.

I chose to connect with my inner self.

I chose to see Luna and to remember that she shines no matter what.  She doesn’t give a shit if people stop to appreciate her beauty – she shines.  She doesn’t switch off just because there are some clouds blocking out her light – she shines.  She doesn’t immediately sit down when the sun starts creeping up on the horizon – she shines.

What a magnificent reminder of how to live a powerful life.

So often we only shine as long as others are paying attention.  As long as it’s fair weather.  As long as nobody else shines brighter.


If you know you’re here for a reason and you have a purpose, it’s your responsibility to shine.

Regardless of who might be looking.

Regardless of what’s going on in your personal life.

Regardless of how much sleep you’ve had.

Just Fucking Shine!

Even that is a choice.  To shine or not to shine…

Everything is a choice.

I just don’t have time to make shitty choices for a long period of time anymore.  Been there.  Done that.  Chucked the pills into the bin.

I don’t have time to play by ordinary rules and beliefs that states we must be fearless and avoid pain at all cost.

We’re going to be scared.

We’re going to hurt.

Personally I choose to choose my stench of fear and my brand of pain.

I choose to use whatever God gave me in his wisdom as tools to live a powerful life filled with growth and learning.

Not that I expect you to make the same choices as me.

That would be a little fucked up.

We’re not the same person.

We don’t have the same life purpose.

We don’t have the same lessons.

We don’t have the same strengths.

Which is exactly why I’m encouraging you today to figure out what feels good to you.  What is it that you would feel when you have achieved your most transformational goals, what can you do to unleash those emotions right now and then choose to feel them!  Or not.

But at least now you’re making a conscious choice.

You step back into your power.

You are already a victor regardless of your choice.

And why wouldn’t you want to choose Darling?

Why the hell not?

Other than fear.

Fear of your power and admitting that your life is the result of your daily choices.

Which would mean that if you don’t like what you see you can choose differently.

Scary shit.

Owning that amount of power.

But I know you.

You have what it takes.

You’re a badass.

You’re a leader.

You came here to do epic shit and change people’s lives.

What will it take for you to choose to do so now instead of ten years from now?

Figure it out.


For death is coming.  You can choose to thrive now.

With love always,


PS:  It saddens me to see how few people are making the connection between body, mind and spirit.  Oh I’m not talking about academically – I know we all say the words.  But very few people actually connect with the wisdom of living it.  Courage, Clarity and Confidence is going to be one helluva ride Darling.  Six weeks of me walking beside you and showing you how to connect to your true purpose and your biggest vision.  How to let go, how to release, how to forgive so that you can move forward without the weight of things long past which is preventing you from loving yourself enough to thrive. I ‘m going to connect you gently to your body so that you make more intuitive choices and give you the confidence to start trusting your intuition.  I anticipate that there will be tears.  I anticipate there will be screams.  I anticipate there will be howling. I anticipate that there will be laughter.  That’s because Courage, Clarity and Confidence is for the natural leader, high achiever who is ready to do the work and make a difference in the lives of others.  Are you?  Are you ready to do the deep work that’s going to change your entire life?  We start Monday.  If you haven’t checked out the details yet do so here.  And if you have any questions hit me a mail and ask!





In any moment you can choose to be happy. Or not.

It’s Monday night.

I fucking love Mondays.

Okay so Saturdays are phenomenal because I have more time to ride my bike.

Sundays are cool because I get to spend some quality time with my family at lunch.

But come Sunday night I’m chomping at the bit.

I’m rearing to go!

Let me at ’em!

I want to get back to work.

I want to create.

I want to inspire.

I want to connect.

Because my work is my life.

I adore it!

Which is why I love Mondays.

As I start winding down getting ready to cook supper, the messages start coming up.

“AAAARGH tomorrow is Monday”

“I hate Mondays”

“Come back weekend!”

And I laugh.

I laugh because I used to think like that.

Until I chose to stop thinking like that.

There came a point where I simply decided that I was spending way too much time at work for me to hate it.

So I changed it.

First I let my rebellious self come out to play and I made deals with my managers – they would stop clock-watching and micro-managing me, I would deliver.

They did and so did I.

Whilst others were sitting in their cubicle offices, scrolling Facebook, drinking shit coffee and using up copious amounts of toilet paper (which all cost the company money), I was out seeing clients in a high vibe all morning, making an impact and then spending the afternoon doing whatever made me happy.  Which had me rearing to go to my clients in high vibe the next morning.

But of course the Universe had other plans for me so there came a time when I was blessed with an asinine boss who made things more challenging for me.

Again, I chose to change it.

I took an enormous breath of air (just in case it would be my last) and made the leap of faith into the unknown world of the self-employed.


I opened my first company in a freezing 3 X 2 meters concrete room behind our garage with no carpet, a tiny window, a fucked up desktop computer and a phone.

I had zero experience building a business.  Zero capital.  Just a burning desire to be happy and to make a difference in someone’s life.

Before you say all the normal bullshit of I was lucky or it was easy for me know this:  I am no different from you!  I had two small boys aged 5 and 2.5.  We were still reeling from the financial impact of our rather disastrous move to Ireland and then back.  I was still on the up from kicking depression to the curb.

Things were motherfucking TOUGH!

But after going to the dark side I just decided that misery wasn’t worth it.

Not at any price.

And no matter how tough things got, I would simply always have to get tougher.

Which is how my life as an entrepreneur started.

It’s never been smooth sailing.  I simply don’t believe that it is for any entrepreneur.  No matter how successful your business becomes, shit always happens.

I built my business up to employing six staff members and then lost everything.


I had to start again from scratch.

But it was worth it.

And it continues to be.

Because I’m fucking happy!

Because I love Mondays.

Does this mean that I don’t have shitty days?


Does it mean that I love everything that I do every day?

Hell no!

But I make it work for me.

Take cooking as an example.

There was a time when I ADORED cooking!

I know I know – hard to believe.

In fact I come from a background of running and owning restaurants.

Then I had kids.

Who are full of shit.

Whose pallets were only fond of Spaghetti Bolognaise and fish fingers.  Anything else they would turn their noses up at.  Or not eat at all.

So I gave in and cooked boring bland kids food.

Until I hated cooking boring bland kids food.

Plus when you have to fucking cook for full of shit people 365 days a year for what’s going on to 18 years now, somehow it can kill the joy.

Which is why I went on strike a couple of months ago and refused to cook for my family.

You’re hungry?

Cook your own goddamn food!

Stomp stomp two year old tantrum.  I do throw these with complete passionate exhilaration.  I’m sure it’s quite exquisite to behold.

It was kinda awesome.

For a while.

But in truth (and I hope they don’t read this blog) I missed loving to cook.

I missed cutting up the fresh ingredients and crunching down on a carrot whilst slicing and dicing.

I missed tasting the pot to see what else I can add to transform the meal from bland to bursting with flavour.

I missed the energy in the kitchen of bubbly water and steaming pots.

It’s alive!

It’s like doing a dance with what the earth gave us to nourish our bodies and souls.

So this weekend I decided to take back my joy.

I put on some Andrea Bocelli, poured a glass of Riesling, and cooked and cooked and cooked.

We had a feast!

Which is how I choose to cook from now on.

Every night.

Even the simplest of meals.

And I choose to then sit down and mindfully enjoy every morsel with a glass of wine and candle light with Andrea romancing me softly in the background.

Because it makes me happy.

It feeds my soul.

And because it’s a powerful fucking choice I make every day.

To be happy.

Know this Darling, no matter what your circumstances right now, you CAN choose happiness.

You can stop your shit and get out of the drama and ask yourself better quality questions:

  • What is good in what I’m doing?  This could be an aspect that you enjoy or the impact that it has on others or connecting it with your purpose.  Anything.  Find the good.
  • How can I do it in a  way that makes it fun?  Can you listen to music or light a candle?  Maybe it’s about having that big-girl conversation with your boss about how to get the best out of you instead of having you sit in peak hour traffic and wasting toilet paper.  Sitting in a high vibe cafe drinking the best coffee in town whilst catching up on admin.
  • What’s the price of my happiness?  Get really honest here.  Look at that pay check or the balance in your account at the end of the month and ask yourself if this is the price of your happiness?  And here’s the thing, when your current levels of happiness is greater than your bank balance, you know you’re a winner!
  • What would this look like when I brought my highest standards of excellence to it?  This is another game changer for me!  Personally I find that half the time misery comes from mediocre work standards.  From me doing it the way most people do it.  I’m not here to be fucking mediocre and I detest average standards.  So the fastest way for me to increase my levels of joy is for me to bring my A game and watch the whole field change. Try it.  It’s fun!

Today my message really is about the power of choice which I think is highly under-utilised by society in general.

I hear people speak like victims




It drives me nuts!

Because everything IS a choice.  Every time you SAY you don’t have a choice, well you’re choosing to feel powerless.

I’m not saying that our choices are always easy.

And the life changing choices are normally the hardest.

Which is why so few people make them.

They prefer to settle.

They prefer to exist.

But for you and I, existence is simply not an option.

Existence is a fate worse than death.

And you know we’re going to die anyway.

Death is inevitable.

Thriving on the other hand is a tough choice to make.

How do you choose today?

With love always,


PS:  Are you ready to finally break that frustrating glass ceiling that keeps you stuck in your excuses and instead experience true success in your business, your health, your life?  Then check out Courage, Clarity and Confidence!  This is my brand new low-end program that’s going to transform lives like never before!!  This is for you if you’re ready to bring the biiiiig changes to your life.  When you’re ready to take that leap of faith and go from ordinary existence, looking the same as everyone else, paying the bills like everyone else, to extraordinary levels of excellence where you thrive!  Where you make the choices that light you up.  Where you make the decisions that are in alignment with your true values and purpose and that just feels fucking amazing!  This is for the high vibe badass achiever craving a life of freedom, adventure and a little mystery.  A journey where we bring your body back to life.  Where you fall in love with yourself.  Where you feel free!  It’s your time now Darling.  Take the leap!

Clear the clutter to rediscover the beauty that’s been there all the time.

I’m still in the turbulent throws of up-levelling.

Things are shifting.

Things are changing.

Things are more than a little scary to say the least.

I’m continuously guided to take action which on the surface appears inconsequential but they’re revealing hidden truths.

Such as the need to clear out my cupboard yesterday.



I’d done it not so long ago.

But the feeling persisted so I opened my doors with the expectation of throwing out one or two items.


I set the intention that anything that doesn’t make me feel sexy, powerful, feminine, opulent, has to go.

I emptied out the first rack and as I sorted the items into ‘stay’ and ‘release’ I was more than a little surprised that the ‘stay’ pile was smaller than the ‘release’.

Fear sprung up unexpectedly.

Ooooh, yum!  A message!  What was this all about?  What were the surface thoughts that sprung to mind?

What if the weather changes all of a sudden and I need these items?

What if never make another cent for as long as I live and I can’t replace any of them?

What if I go into that big corporate boardroom and I need the stuffy shirt after all?

Which is fucking insane!

But human.

Funny thing is, I could get rid of three quarters of my wardrobe and I would STILL have clothes to wear every day regardless of the temperature.

I’ve already made the decision that if another corporate chooses to work with me it will be because they resonate with my truth, not with my image.

Just keeping it real.

I continued.

Rack after rack.

Finally as I stood back I was amazed at the result.

Not only has my wardrobe significantly shrunk in size, but I rediscovered items I had long forgotten about!  Really gorgeous items such as my Chinese Silk PJ’s.

My wardrobe is filled with beauty.

My wardrobe is now beautiful to look at in itself.  A collection of art on display.

Here’s the thing though – I know that everything is connected.

Everything in our outer world is a reflection of our inner states and beliefs.

Which meant that once again it was time to investigate what’s going on for me.

Why did I default to wearing really shapeless boys pyjamas when I had these???


It felt safe to wear boys PJ’s.

I felt invisible wearing boys PJ’s.

I suppressed my feminine talents by wearing boys PJ’s.

And shapeless tops.

And baggy Jeans.

And old tracksuit pants that don’t fit me properly.

I call them ‘comfortable’ and ‘easy’ to slip on.

But that’s bullshit.

In truth they are ‘safe’ and ‘average’.


They are cleverly disguised tools I’ve used to fit in with my surroundings like human bodies painted to melt into the background.

To not stand out.

To not get noticed.

Which made me look even further for evidence of where we as a family tend to use the ‘cheap and cheerful’ things which has an impact on our energy.

This coming Saturday we’re unpacking ALL the cupboards!

And the garage courtesy of the Universe as it got flooded by the washing machine outlet yesterday.

Here’s the learning though – safe is fucked up!

Safe had me wearing boys PJ’s at night which is the time I dream my most femininely empowered visions for God’s sakes!

Safe had me drinking out of cheap glasses when I have crystal in the cupboard!

In truth safe is not keeping me safe at all.

Safe is killing my soul!

For my soul is hungry for adventure and growth and expansion and impact.

My soul is starving for beauty and opulence and freedom.

My soul salivates with the desire to thrive!

As I unloaded the bundles of clothes into the charity bin I felt an immense sense of gratitude wash over me!

It was as if a steel band was unlocked from my chest and I could breathe freely again.

Every item will serve someone else beautifully.

A boy will have cozy PJ’s to curl up in and dream of naughty shenanigans for school.

A woman will have a pink leather jacket that has her strutting into her next interview with confidence, changing her future forever.

It’s all connected.


We’re here to serve by not holding on out of fear but to continuously expand and relax into the flow of things.

That includes our ‘stuff’.

Things that served us once upon a time but now keeps us restricted.

And trust me – quantity never trumps quality!

Not for me anyway.

Exceptional quality is one of my core values which demands that I honour it every day for me to be in alignment.

And alignment has become a non-negotiable for anything else is just normal.



And I’m done with all that shit.

I’m going magical.



Are you joining me?

I promise it will be a little scary.  It will be filled with uncertainty.  It will ask you to have faith like never before.  In the Universe, in yourself.

But it will be an adventure!  Thrilling!  Fun!

If so, I invite you to start with a simple action such as your wardrobe.

Set your intention of how you want each and every item to make you feel.

And be ruthless.

Be courageous.




But I also want you to do this consciously.  Curiously.  Wanting to understand what’s the connection for you.  What’s the meaning of certain items that maybe have you feel less that magnificent.  Start making the connections.  Otherwise it’s just another action.

And you and I are done with just taking mindless actions.

We’re taking conscious action.

We’re taking aligned action.

We’re taking purposeful action.

For that’s just how we roll.

I would absolutely LOVE to hear from you.

What did you let go?

How did it feel?

What does this new space allow in?  And with this I’m not referring to new clothes.  I’m referring to new creative energy.

For there was a time to hide.  But that time has passed.

Now is your time to rise Darling.


For death is inevitable.  Thriving is a choice.

With love always,


PS:  It’s time to go deeper than ever before.  Right back into your foundation.  It’s time to stop doing poly-filla courses and to do the real work.  The work that will transform all areas of your life – because it IS all connected.  Courage, Clarity and Confidence is an eclectic six week adventure where we connect you to your purpose in a way that will never have you give up three feet from gold again.  Mind, body and soul is united through mind-set, yoga and magic.  If you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired and you desire to own who you truly are, then this is the course you’ve been wishing for.  After all, everything you see in your physical reality you’ve created with your thoughts.  Which means really this course is YOUR creation, not mine.  I’m simply the vehicle for your desired outcomes.  However the Universe will deliver everything you ask, it’s still up to you to take the action.  Don’t say you’ll wait for next time – it’s your time NOW.  Take my hand Darling and let’s dance.



A beautiful unfurling of remembrance

When I first sent Kaylene the message that I’m going back to black, she was less than enthusiastic.

Way less.

In fact was crystal clear that she thought this was one of my shittiest ideas ever.

But I knew it was time.

The knowing’s been building up inside for a while now.

In my fear I kept pushing it to the side – I’ll get to it next year.  I have tons of time.  No need to rush.

Just be for now.

OMG I really can bullshit myself with the best of them at times.


It’s NOW.

So I sat in the chair and watched in excited anticipation as she reluctantly pushed the colour out of an obstinate tube.

Three hours later I looked at my reflection, my heart expanding.

I know you.

I remember you.

You’re my truth.

You’re my perfection.

In a moment of pure connection I fell in love with myself.

Maybe you get this.

Maybe you don’t.

Maybe you think I’m just full of shit.

But when you’ve gone through most of your life abandoning your essence to conform to the expectations of others in a desperate effort to be loved and liked, you start walking with your shoulders hunched slightly, your chin sinks a little lower, your eyes sheltered from yourself – a shell filled with shame and fear and resentment and guilt.

The first time I was introduced to mirror work I thought it was the dumbest shit I’ve ever come across.  I stood in front of that mirror for the longest time saying “I love you” with my mouth whilst everything inside of me screamed “YOU FUCKING LYING BITCH!”

I didn’t.

I didn’t see anything that was worthy of my love or anyone else’s.

I had lied to myself.  I had cheated on myself.  I had poisoned myself.  I had abused myself.  I had locked my truth in a coffin and put away the key.

Who could possibly love THAT?

I had no respect for myself.  I was nothing but a traitor – to my boys, to my soul tribe, but most of all to myself.

And let me tell you Darling that there is nothing more excruciating than betrayal of self!


It’s soul suicide which is probably why so many people are walking around – the living dead.

The journey back to love is torturous and scary and so fucking slow that at times you forget that you’re even on the path.

What makes it even harder is the fact that when we make the decision to start healing, our physical reality remains a reflection of our old self choices for quite some time.  I’m going to stick my neck out here and say that even though internal change can happen in an instance, the external change can take fucking years to catch up.

Which means that now you have to become twice as strong because you need the tenacity to keep going and form new neural pathways, you have to reprogram your beliefs, you have to up level physically, mentally, emotionally AND on top of that you have to do this in faith even though your external world appears to be in complete contradiction.

It takes grit!

It takes discipline!

It takes dedication!

Which of course are not exactly characteristics which are common place in a society who believes that everything should fall in their laps instantly.

Anything else is just too much effort Daaaaahling.

But you’re fucking worth the effort!

You’re worth doing the work day in and day out and waking up one day and exclaiming “IT’S TIME!”

You’re worth looking in the mirror and falling in love with the soul reflected in your eyes.

You’re worth filling your lungs with sweet life oxygen and translating that into sound as your words of truth are spoken out loud.

You’re worth feeling love as you wrap your arms around yourself and radiate from within.

You’re fucking worth it!

And let me tell you Darling that it’s never about learning anything new!  It’s not about changing.  It’s not about faking you.

It’s the other way around.

It’s about going within and listening to the wisdom of all time that resides in your heart.  It’s about peeling back the layers of protection you’ve added over the years in response to the hurt and revealing the real you – the glorious you.  It’s about becoming MORE of your authentic self.

Ultimately it’s about trusting yourself again.

The way you did when you started crawling.

The way you did when you took your first wobbly step.

The way you did when you danced like a monkey with your chubby arms flailing about and feeling like a goddamn princess.

Don’t you miss that?

Don’t you crave that?

Don’t you just want to look in the mirror again and feel soooooo immensely fucking proud of yourself that you can’t stop yourself from unleashing healing onto the world?

Don’t you want to speak your truth regardless of the naysayers?

Don’t you want to get out of that fucking coffin that’s been suffocating you with the stench of decay?

Then RISE Darling RISE!

It starts with a declaration to yourself, to the Universe, to all who are in hearing distance that you will NEVER again tolerate patience in the return to loving yourself.  You will NEVER again dim your bright for the dark.  You will NEVER again listen to the lies of others when you know the truth within yourself.

The truth that you matter.

The truth that you’re enough.

The truth that you’re magnificence in human form here to make a powerful impact.

Make no mistake, the declaration takes a shit ton of courage.  In fact I bet only 1% of people who are reading this will take this first step.

Are you that 1%?

Are you?

Will you do it?

Ultimately it’s your choice.

Everything is your choice.

And if you choose to remain the same even if you don’t love the same because that’s enough for you, then I completely respect that.

But if you choose to remain the same because you’re too fucking scared to change then I want to rage in your heart and say to you today grow a pair!  A gigantic pair!







For ultimately death is inevitable.  But thriving is a choice that YOUR soul clients need you to make today.

With love always,


PS:  If you feel the stirring in your heart to rise up, to connect with your purpose, to wake up with enthusiasm and do your work in this world with the magical power that flows in your veins then you want to get into Courage, Clarity and Confidence.  A six week adventure where you take that gorgeous finger of yours, draw a line in the sand, and step the fuck over!  Together we’ll do the work, the real work, the soul work.  From connecting to your purpose, to letting go of the albatross dragging you down, to lighting the spark of magic in your heart.  Because you matter Darling. The work that you’re here to do matters.  And this is the time to start doing it.  We start Monday the 14th of August (New Zealand Time).  Get all the details here.  Let’s dance.





Coffee – strong, black and bitter: Evidence of next level thrive!

Have you ever had it happen to you?

Where you’ve made the decision to go next level.

You’ve taken the time to get very fucking clear of what that looks like.

You’ve done the real work.

You’ve drawn a line in the sand.

And then you wake up wanting your coffee strong, black and bitter.

That’s what happened to me.


Historically I couldn’t drink my coffee black and bitter so it’s always been either milk or sugar.

But my next level bitch drinks the stuff as nature intended:  just add water.

And so it is.


The shift happened so fast that I’m reeling a tad.  I can feel the demand of my soul for complete cleanse, release, expand, return to my true nature.  My authentic expression of creativity in human form.

This has happened to me twice before.

Once when I made the decision to become an IronMan and the other when I decided to move to New Zealand.

What I’ve found is that the moment we have TOTAL fucking commitment and we make the decision that it is done, the forces of nature takes on a whole new dimension and shit happens fast.

Fuck traditional wisdom, red tape and circumstances.

All of that is transcended we’re shown the potential power that resides within each and every one of us.

It’s magical.

And it’s also scary as fuck.

People who loved us before all of a sudden feel threatened and become aggressive – desperate to protect their egos just in case you actually expect them to do something extraordinary as well.

All your previous excuses of why you were still in the same position as you have been for the past ten years become just that – excuses.

In fact I was chatting to God this morning and saying how funny it is that we humans are all up in arms about freedom of choice except when we look at our lives and we’re not exactly thrilled with what we see, we say we don’t have a choice.

We HAVE to work in the dead-end job to pay the bills because we’re responsible.

We HAVE to eat meat because our bodies need the protein and everyone knows how unhealthy vegetarians are.

We HAVE to drink a bottle of wine at night because we’re so stressed out and it helps us relax.

We HAVE to smoke another cigarette because we are addicted – helpless, we don’t have the willpower to break it.

We HAVE to work ourselves into a coma because the economy is unpredictable and what if this is the last good season before we lose our clients.

All such valid reasons as to why we’re living our current lives and then bitching about how stressed and burnt out we are.  How nobody understands us and what we’re going through.

How fucking insensitive Anel is and that she just don’t have any compassion.


Except you know what Darling, I probably have more compassion than your entire neighbourhood put together.

I absolutely have compassion for the suffocating soul within the body dying to be let out and play just a little freer.

I absolutely have compassion for feeling powerless and trapped and lonely and broken.

At times I still tell myself the same bullshit as everyone else.

I still tell myself I don’t have a choice.

I still tell myself it’s just how it is.

But then I talk to God and we both laugh at my bullshit and I get up and have my coffee black and bitter.

I take out my moon ring and I magically write my day into existence because why wouldn’t I?

Why would I start my day with a blank page for everyone else to write on?

Why would I just wait until I’ve read my emails to see who’s shouting louder than my dreams to dictate what I’m going to do next?

Fuck that shit.

I choose to take complete ownership of the physical expression of my choices.

Some I adore.

Some I’m looking at with a raised eyebrow and saying “Seriously Anel?  WTF girl?”

And those I’m choosing to change.

Because I know that I can.

I know it starts with a decision.

I know it starts with drawing a line in the sand.

I know it starts with me stating to the Universe what I’m no longer willing to tolerate it and MEANING it.

I know it starts with me getting crystal clear on what it is that I’m creating next and then taking aligned action no matter how uncomfortable it feels at times.

Because aligned action doesn’t mean easy action.

Aligned action doesn’t mean zero effort.

Aligned action means the action that takes you from where you are to where you want to be and that entails growth Darling – personal growth, spiritual growth, mental growth, emotional growth.

And growth is not a comfortable thing.

Not at all.

You have to be willing to say “Bite me”  and then bleed when someone decides to take you up on it.

You have to be willing to say “Adios Monchachos” when you’re asked to slow down, to stand still, to shut the fuck up.

You have to be willing to see the evidence that the Universe gifts you with every single day – like spotting your next tattoo design and exclaiming YES!  Like making that cup of coffee and putting the milk back in the fridge because your tummy starts turning at the mere thought.

You have to be willing to work when others are sleeping.

You have to be willing to colour outside the lines and being criticised because your art is ugly for those who like the lines.

You have to be willing to say no to others when they cross your boundaries.

Fuck you need to be willing to HAVE boundaries!

And then you have to be willing to thrive Darling.

You have to be willing to absolutely start laughing for no reason because you simply can’t get over the fact that life is magical!

You have to be willing to receive with grace and gratitude and joy and opulence because life force is going to rain down on your head drenching your soul with everything that you’ve desired for such a long time.

You have to be willing to step up and be the leader you were born to be.  To be the change catalyst.  To inspire others by being true to your authentic self.  To prick the bear’s balls to wake him from his slumber.

Just because that’s why you’re here in the first place.

And when you start living your purpose fully, your definition of fun changes.  Your heart expands and instead of caring less you start caring so much more.

You start showing up for you tribe.

You start showing up for you.

And it’s one helluva ride!

Why the fuck wouldn’t you want to?

Because it’s scary.

I know.

It’s not a life for the weak and the meek.  It’s a life for the brave.

For it all starts with having the courage to make a powerful statement to the entire universal force of creation.  And we were taught to whisper in prayer rather than stating from a place of authority.  We were taught not to anger the gods for they will unleash thunder and lightning and the sky will fall on our heads.

I don’t think so.

Not my God anyway.

My God listens to me rant and rave at 5 am until I start seeing how ludicrous it is and then we both roll around on the floor laughing our asses off.  And then he says “Okay Anel, now stop fucking around and get to work.  It’s time”

It’s time.

It’s your time too.

Take me hand.

For death is inevitable. But thriving is a choice you can make today by taking a single courageous step.

With love always,


PS:  Have you seen the epic journey I’ve prepared for you?? Courage, Clarity and Confidence is you, me and some badass warriors connecting with your true purpose, wiping the shit off your glasses so you can see clearly, and then speaking your message with rocking confidence.  Mind-set,movement and magic unleashes your trilogy of power in body, mind and spirit.  PLUS as an early bird special the first 50 get my Chakra Business Building Model for free because that’s just how we roll.  If you’re not in yet and you KNOW this is your next step to leave behind all you’re tolerating, then get your sexy ass moving darling.  Get all the details here and let’s play.



If I died today, this is what I want my boys to know.

To my darling boys,

I’m not sure if you guys will ever read this, but if I die today I pray that someone will tag you so you do.

I wonder sometimes why on earth you ever chose me to be your mother.

Whatever your reasons, know that I am beyond grateful and humbled for this opportunity to guide you as best I can.

The beauty of your souls.

The courage of your spirits.

The depth of your love.

You are my inspiration.

Being a parent is probably the hardest thing any person can be called to do. I suspect the reason why God gave us orgasms is that if it wasn’t for that, nobody would actively volunteer to continue what Adam and Eve started.

It’s even more challenging if like me, you came into this space and time with the soul purpose to disrupt the status quo.

To think differently.

To question everything.

And why the fuck wouldn’t I? Shit is clearly not working properly at the moment.

You don’t have to look very far to see the truth of this statement.

Just check out the profit margins of the pharmaceutical and alcohol industries!

And I know you guys have experienced the painful impact of both these industries.

I find myself in this constant internal struggle of teaching you how to play the game so the blows to your heads, hearts and souls will be minimised – and make no mistake boys, the more you think, the more you speak your truth, the more the masses will try to smother your passion – and giving mediocrity a big fat middle finger and starting a fucking revolution of a generation who start thinking again!

A generation who stops consuming and starts creating.

A generation who makes conscious decisions in every aspect from their lives. From how they spend their time to what they eat to how they move their bodies to how they live their lives.

But that’s the hard path.

I know that’s your destinies.

I’ve been watching you guys with fascination for as long as I can remember.

And please know that whatever happens next, whatever crazy shit I do, I do it because I’m inspired by you.

I’m inspired by the depth of your conversations when you think nobody is watching you. By the strength of your bond when you set testosterone aside for a while. By your acceptance of your uniqueness even when you confuse the shit out of your Dad and I.

Know that it’s not that I ever want you to conform – EVER!

But it’s human nature to be worried when you can’t make sense of something.

And I rarely make sense of you guys.

Which is the beauty of you!

I watch the way in which you guys show up around your mates when there’s no adults around. I watch you guys lead them without even realising that you’re doing it. How you speak your truth even when it’s not the ‘cool’ words to speak.

I adore that about you guys.

It gives me the courage to show up each day and continue my work even when I have no idea where it will lead.

All I know is that change is coming and we are to be a part of that change.

Ghandi said be the change that you want to see in the world.

Truest words you’ll ever hear.

I don’t think people really get the depth of this message though.

It means that you stop feeling a fucking victim of others, of politics, of economies, of bullshit and YOU show the fuck up for yourself and your dreams.

It means that instead of bitching and moaning about the behaviours of others, YOU decide how you want to experience your relationships and you start showing up as that and your relationships will evolve. Yes, sometimes that means a relationship with one person needs to end, but that’s just because the relationship with another person is ready to be birthed.

This is true for all relationships – friendship, romance, clients, family, all of it.

I want to tell you guys to never stop questioning the rules and if they’re screwing people over – BREAK THEM!

Personally I believe that 90% of our current rules and values are archaic and served an old world but is killing the people in this world.

Don’t EVER think you have to do ANYTHING to make your dad or myself proud.


You guys are perfect and wonderful and magnificent just as you are. You don’t have to add anything! You don’t have to get a ‘good’ education or a ‘good’ job for me to be proud.

Just be happy!

In everything you do.

Because when you do the epic shit that lights you up, you’re living your life purpose.

Trust this.

Your souls already know what you’re here to do and every time you do it, he dances! That’s when you feel the joy. And it’s normally in the most unexpected activities and circumstances.

Don’t EVER let anybody tell you that you can’t do something!
Don’t EVER let anybody tell you that you have to be more responsible or grow up!
Don’t EVER let anybody tell you that you must stop dreaming!

Your dreams are your reality awaiting manifestation.

Your job is to keep dreaming.
Your job is to keep taking aligned action and making your dreams come true.
Because when you do, you inspire others to do the same.
And as born leaders, you’re here to inspire.

Which probably leaves me with a small apology to make.

I’m sorry I haven’t broken more rules.
I’m sorry I haven’t done more crazy shit than I have (but I’m hoping I still have time).
I’m sorry I haven’t fucked up more – although you’ll probably never hear all the failures I’ve had in my life.
I’m sorry that I haven’t made a bigger impact to date.

But I’ll make you this promise my Darling Boys – Every day from this day forth I will show the fuck up for my life purpose.

I will roar my message into the dessert and believe that a ripple of change will start that will make this world a better place for you.

I will embrace the haters and never let their furious attacks dim the brightness of my love for you.

I will keep rising every time I fall so that I can lead the way for you.

For I don’t believe I have the right to ask anything from you that I’m not prepared to ask of myself.

I don’t believe I have the right to ask you guys to live your dreams if I’m not prepared to go full out on my own.

And when I take my last breath know that from the moment you guys were born, each breath has been filled with my love for you. As I have breathed in your love for me.

Thank you for choosing me to be your mother in this lifetime.

I hope I make you proud.

Be yourselves.

Be true.

Never settle.

Fuck mediocrity.

Fuck existence.

For death is inevitable my Darling Boys. But thriving, OMG that is a choice a pray you make.

With love eternal,
Your mom

PS: And Mommy, thank you for all you’ve done for me. I would pick you a trillion times again. Thank you for inspiring me to love myself. It’s taken a while Mom but I’ve arrived. How can I ever thank you enough.

PPS: For every parent and child who reads this, it’s time for us to be the change we say we want to see in the world. It’s really time to stop putting it onto the shoulders of the next generation and then still telling them how to do it in a way that conforms to the bullshit that isn’t working. Join me today and start questioning. Start connecting with your purpose. Start taking aligned action to your dreams. Be courageous – for it’s time the warriors wake and rise to heal a dying world.

Is the suppression of our truth and our emotions killing us?

There comes a time when we have to question that which nobody appears to question.

We have to question why nobody is talking about it.

We have to question the impact that not questioning is having on us.

I don’t think we came to this life to be silent.

To be PC (Politically Correct for those of you who, like me, wonder what the fuck PC stands for).

To live in an energy of fear of the consequences of our beautifully inquisitive minds and speaking it out loud.

Last night as I was driving my son to soccer practice there was a clip on the radio about a boy who’d pointed out a mistake in some natural museum regarding dinosaurs.  At first the mother didn’t want to take it up with them because well, how can they possibly be wrong?  They’re a museum for heavens sake and he was just a snot-nosed youngster.

Turns out he was right.

They rectified the mistake.

But what really hit home for me were the comments made around children always speaking their truth and it’s okay every now and again but nobody wants their child to be a smart-ass.

Why the fuck not?

Why wouldn’t we encourage our kids to say whatever is on their minds.  Even if we don’t agree.  Even when it’s irritating on our already tired and frazzled nerves.

Because at some stage we are going to pay the price for silencing smart-asses!

And I believe that this is more apparent than ever before.

I believe that this is where a shit ton of our current epidemics are starting.

By us telling our kids to keep their opinions to themselves.

By us telling them not to say anything that could possibly embarrass us.

And then when they hang their heads we tell them not to sulk, to grow up.

To fucking die!

Because here’s what I’m seeing – I’m seeing people suppressing their opinions, their truths, their passion, their feelings, and people are dying.

When I studied Pranic Healing I was fascinated to discover the reason why energy healing is so effective is because every disease or injury in the physical body has an origin in the energy body.  And the energy body is impacted by emotions.

That means that all physical disease has an emotional origin.

Now before you go into this hugely scientific argument here, just pause and think.  Yes, we all have the cancer thingy in our genes, but what is the trigger?

Get out of your ego and feel into this.

Because if we’ve all had these ‘potential diseases’ floating around in our bodies for as long as time goes back, why is it that there is such an increase in illnesses such as cancer and diabetes all around us?

I can’t remember when last a month has gone by where I haven’t heard of another person diagnosed with cancer!

Young people.

I believe it’s due to an oppression of emotion.

I believe it’s because people are encouraged to stop speaking what’s on their mind and so they walk around in fear, insecurity, frustration, suppressed anger and resentment.

Dark shit Baby.

When we talk about those things we worry about, we start seeing it in a different light.

We figure out solutions to perceived problems.

We get input that clarifies or puts a different spin on that which is going around and around in our heads with no definitive direction.

Instead the uncertainty turns into fear which is made worse by the false bravado we put up as a protective front.  Because let’s face it, whenever you appear weak you become an easy target for the assholes.

So now you have this powerful individual who came here to question, to shine a light on darkness, to bring clarity through thinking and instead of being on a platform where they reach their soul tribe and collectively find a new way of living and being, they’re literally being suffocated by their silence.  Drowning in their fear.

Their bottled up emotions are pushed down into their base chakras and it spreads up like a volcano building up pressure.

What happens to a volcano?

Pretty much the same as what’s happening in people.

There’s an eruption that shakes the core and destroys all in its path.

Either the body erupts into disease to increase the suffering thereby highlighting the need for inquisition, for healing.

Or the person’s emotions erupt in a way that they find hard to control so they either switch off through further medication, or put a label on themselves and go to therapy because it’s easier to cope with the label than the emotions.

Or they kill themselves because they simply can’t bare the pain of silence any longer.

I’m not saying that we should close down all the pharmacies and burn the doctors and therapists!

What I am saying is that we can’t continue only treating symptoms.

We have to start treating the actual cause as well.

We have to go the root – the emotions!

We have to use the emotions as a path of inquiry to understand their message.

People say that we have to put our faith in ‘modern medicine’ but what about all the lost wisdom of ancient medicine?

What about looking at all the shit we are continuously putting into our vessels – the food, the gossip, the fear, the PC bullshit?

What about looking at how we’re telling our kids on public radio that nobody likes a smart-ass?

I fucking adore smart-asses!

They are ballsy.

They are brilliant.

The world needs more smart-asses!

We also seriously need to start having real conversations.

Fuck talking about what you read on Facebook today or what’s happening on the other side of the globe!

What about the shit that’s happening in your town, your neighbourhood, your home?

How about having those conversations?

But that would mean getting uncomfortable.

And let’s face it – people don’t like being uncomfortable.

Uncomfortable is too powerful an emotion for most to handle.

Let’s rather go to the pub and make fun of people being enslaved to make us cheap clothes because that we can handle.

Let’s rather have our kids watch YouTube videos of a kitten getting a fright and accidentally jumping out a window to it’s death.  Because that’s funny right?

Let’s rather have our young people play PS4 games of death and destruction because you know ‘it’s only fantasy’.  Never mind the fact that the graphics are so realistic that you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between what’s drawn and what’s real.  Because of course we are not desensitising our next generation of leaders to murder.

It’s fucked up people!

And nobody is prepared to talk about it.

Keep quiet.

Be pleasant.

Make others feel okay.

Don’t feel too much.

Just exist.

Just fit in.

Just keep the status quo.




When are we going to say ‘Enough and no more?’

When are we going to say ‘Fuck-it’ and just speak our minds even if nobody around us agrees with us?

And let me just make it clear – this is NOT about me being right and you being wrong.  This is about opening up a discussion for thought.  Not thought in terms of what is written on the world wide web.  Thought by inquisition from a place of wisdom.  What your gut says.

Until we start having these conversations we’re never going to stimulate our minds to do what they do best – SEE POSSIBILITIES!

You don’t need a degree to know what’s good and bad for you.

You don’t need a degree to talk about your emotions.

You don’t need a degree to think out of the box.

You just need a little bit of courage.

Okay maybe you need a lot of courage.

But what’s the worst thing that could happen for speaking up?

People won’t like you?  Well there will always be people who won’t like you.

Someone else could have a stronger argument than you and actually convince you that they’re right?  Well isn’t that just grande???

Someone will kill you?  Darling – you’re going to die anyway!

Death is inevitable.

Thriving is a choice.

A brave choice.

A choice that goes against the masses.

It’s all a choice.

It’s also a choice to stand in your power and start speaking your truth thereby healing your body.

Just saying.

With love always,


PS:  I’m calling in the spiritual rebels, the born leaders, the creatives, the change catalysts who are ready to start owning their truth, find their voice, heal themselves and spread that healing to the world.  I’m calling in my soul tribe for it’s time to rise.  You have hidden long enough in the throngs of average.  You’ve faded into the background long enough swallowing your power.  It’s your time now.  You are ready for the next step now.  Courage, Clarity and Confidence.  For nobody else is going to bring about the change that you’re here to start.  Deep breath.  Trust.  Believe.  And rise gorgeous warrior.  Rise.



Simple Doesn’t Mean Easy

Hmmmm this is a challenging post for me to write as this is such an integral part of my personal learning journey.

In fact I feel the resistance within myself thinking ‘aah maybe I shouldn’t write this because it’s such a boring topic.  Simplicity’.

Which is how I know this is exactly what I need to write about today.

Probably more for myself than for you.

But maybe you need to hear this today as well.

Maybe like me you need to continuously remind yourself to slow the fuck down to speed up.

You see, like you, I’m an over- achiever.

I love doing the hard stuff.

The things that are seriously challenging – mentally, physically, emotionally.

It thrills me.

It excites me.

I.  Fucking.  Adore.  It.

Which could very well be why my Soul led me to a yoga mat.

Mother of chilli peanut butter it’s humbling!  Grrrrrr.

Yoga is reminding me that simple doesn’t mean easy.

In fact, it’s the complete opposite.

Simple is about remembering.

How to breathe.

How to release.

How to expand.

How to hold.

How to be.

How to have a fully present conversation without the desire for controlling the outcome in your favour.

How to be in a relationship where you don’t demand the other person to conform to your non-conformity.

How to release all your thoughts and the judgement around your thoughts.

At which point we connect with our most powerful inner knowing and wisdom and are guided to the correct inspired action.

The HARD part of simplicity is the self-discipline.

The discipline to back off when your body will benefit more from recovery than pain.

The discipline to stick to the preparatory postures when everyone else is going pretzel around you.

The discipline to always return to loving yourself and finding therein that which you’re seeking from others.

The discipline to look within for the answers to your most frustrating situations rather than blaming everyone and everything around you.

Because until you achieve mastery over yourself, your thoughts, your emotions, you will NEVER achieve mastery in any area of your life.

Not in your profession.

Not in your relationships.

Not in your fitness.


And mastery over self is achieved through simplicity and continued practice even when you think it is ‘boring’.

I’m starting to suspect that complexity is just another cleverly crafted way of keeping people small.

I think it’s a play on the human ego that either has you doing stupid shit you’re not ready to do thereby getting injured or defeated in the process, or worse, getting you to the point of not even trying OR getting you doing the complex stuff and looking from the outside as if you’re taking all the right actions but internally you’re recruiting all the wrong muscle groups and so you miss out on the real healing, the real power, the real you in full bloom.

Either way, they win and you lose.

I’ve taken a look around at those who meet my personal definition for success i.e. not just wealth and sporty cars, but healthy relationships, epic physique and health, spiritually grounded.  You know – happy…

What I’ve observed is that they in fact keep everything as simple as possible.  From what they eat, to how they train, to how they conduct business, to how they speak.  Fuck all the jargon that has people more confused than before they asked for you to share your insights and knowledge.

Old school Darling.

They are in it for the long haul.

So they slow down to speed up.

They take their time and they learn the basics and practice it over and over again until it reaches the point of automatisation.  And then they layer another simple thing on top of that trusting that they have a rock solid foundation that’s not going to crumble.  They practice that over and over again and if something doesn’t work you know what they do?

They don’t go out and look for the next fad.

They go back to basics and reinforce the foundation.



But do you want to know why that’s such a big ask?

Because we’re competitive – oh please, stop denying it – and competition is an ego-driven activity.

So we cut the corners in order to save face.

I remember being out on a base ride with my coach.

The bastard took my Polar and monitored my heart rate.  Every time there was a slight little uphill my heart rate would increase and he would look at me and in his very demanding voice say “Sit up!”  Which meant I had to slow the fuck down until my heart rate was back to base pace.




It was excruciating!

It was humiliating.

A group of newbies came past, all out of shape and out of breath, swinging all over the show.  I was going so slow that in comparison they might have been going a 100 kilometres an hour.

And then to make it even worse – they all said hello!!!!


He knew that everything inside of me wanted to stand up on those peddles and put the hammer down to overtake them and get back to where I belong – the front.

But there was not a drop of mercy in his steely gaze.


For the next thirty minutes not only did I have to ‘sit up’ and keep my heart rate just above catatonic, but in addition I had to endure his lecture on how my lack of self-discipline will keep me average and that I had to start trusting the process or go find myself another coach.

My head hung low.

I sulked for a week.

In truth, the reason I sulked was not because he made me sit up, or because I got overtaken by beginners (okay that might have had a little something to do with it).  I sulked because I knew deep inside that I’ve let my ego overtake my wisdom and dictate my results.

I would love to say lesson learned, but we both know that would be a lie.

I’m still learning this lesson.

Because I’m a born achiever.

A competitor.

I want to win goddamit.

I want to do achieve the hard stuff.

I want to pretzel!!

And I will – eventually.

For now, I’m embracing the fact that I’m nowhere near done living and so for me to achieve my ultimate vision I’m taking my time to slow down and build a really solid foundation for myself.

In yoga.

In business.

In relationships.

So what if I end up to be the oldest woman to finally get her ass in the air for crow pose?

For now I’m making more conscious choices.  And sometimes that choice is to say ‘fuck it’ and do the complicated posture like a moron or chase the rabbit on a base ride – willing to pay the price in ultimate performance.

Let’s call it me being human.

I invite you to bring some awareness to your life right now and to maybe investigate where you’ve become impatient and started doing the advanced poses, the intricate strategies, the huge project plans before your foundation was unshakable?  Where are you dropping the basics and paying the ultimate price?  Where are you feeling you have to rush through to get to the next thing because then maybe you should stop wasting your time Darling and only do that which you’re in for for the long run.

Why the fuck not?

Why would you waste your time on shit to just tick the boxes?

That’s crazy!

You have this magnificent opportunity to LIVE!

Stop wasting it with shit that keeps you distracted, busy, exhausted.

Commit to the long run.

Commit to slowing down to speed up.

Simplify your life and feel the immediate expansion and creative energy rise from within.

That’s where flow can find you.

There’s no need to rush.

For death will find you anyway.  Why not choose to thrive until then?

With love always,


PS:  Are you ready?   Are you ready to stop the madness of complexity and go back to basics?  Back to connecting with your truth, find your voice, eliminate the bullshit and live a life of authenticity, joy and mastery? Then it’s time to take the first courageous step in a new direction!  Courage, Clarity and Confidence is a six week journey with me to shift from anxiety, frustration and feeling a tad underwhelmed to connecting with your courageous warrior, gaining clarity of purpose and the confidence to get whatever you truly desire through mind-set, movement and magic.  We start 14 August.  It’s time Darling.  It’s time.  Get all the details here.



FEAR – Fuck Everything And Rise!

Aaaah fear, terror, fright, fearfulness, horror, alarm, panic, agitation, trepidation, dread, consternation, dismay, distress.

I’m starting to suspect that next to joy fear might be my second most favourite emotion to sit in.

Which has me pausing and doubting my sanity for a fraction of a breath.

Doubt because from the time I can remember I was schooled that we when we feel fear we have to pull tail between legs and fucking run as fast as we possibly can.

The other way.

Because fear is ‘bad’.

Or is it?

Is fear not just as good as joy?  Does it not have the same intensity, if not more, and therefore intrinsic power?

And let’s be honest here, this entire world is ALL about power.

Power over land.

Power over animals.

Power over resources.

Power over others.

Fuck me Georgie, these days some people are even trying to get power over the natural elements as designed by God!

So what better way to gain power than use one of the most intense emotions available to mankind and using it to keep the masses in their place.

So ‘they’ scare us all the time.

They tell us that there’s scarcity and we have to move ass or loose out forever because somebody else will grab our portion and we’ll be left without – forever.

They show us horror and despicable acts of cruelty that fills my throat with bile as vomit pushes up the wrongness from the pit of my stomach.

They bring out the big guns and threaten acts of terror upon those going about their daily business, living, existing, doing the best they can.

They write their fucked up little contracts on their fucked up little word documents and put it somewhere in the unknown cloud resulting in others pulling a trigger to blow their fucking minds out because they felt so helpless about bullshit fucking contractual law!

Are you fucking kidding me???

I love fear, I embrace fear, I walk with fear because I OWN the power that lies within for me.

For you.

For everyone.

Fear is nothing but a big motherfucking blazing signs that says “OPTIONS AHEAD.  CHOICES ABOUND.  GROWTH OPPORTUNITY TO UNLEASH YOUR FUCKING BRILLIANCE!”

THAT’s what fear is.

Fear is that moment of grace when you get to stand your ground, switch on your soul, activate your mind and start thinking creatively because the mundane is simply not working for you anymore.

What happens?

Well most people are so fucking scared of fear that they become frozen.  Like deer in a headlight they stop thinking.  They stop breathing.  They stop.

They become mindless slaves to those who are smugly holding the sign up high to indoctrinate the masses into submission.

They become so desperate for others to save them that they hand them their personal power on a silver platter begging for mercy.

Well I’m sorry.

You can take your mercy and shove it up your pompous ass!

For I am not here to submit to your threats and your illusions of grandeur.

I’m not here to shrink whilst you hold up your shadow puppets to look like monsters in their black reflections on the wall.

Not me Bitch.

Not me.

I’m here to take that flash light and to shine it onto your hand so others can see you for the fake you are.

Thinking the sight of my blood will silence me.

And I’m going to admit that there’s been times in the past when I sat down quietly.  Hiding in my bedroom, balled up with tears streaming down my face because it hurt and I wanted to hurt to stop.  I just wanted to feel happy.


Happy is simply not good enough for my standards anymore.


And so I’ve made friends with fear.  I hold her hand, look into her eyes and ask her to show me the way.  To show me the truth.  To lead the way to where I’m meant to walk.

Because I look in the mirror and I know that I’m not a body with a soul.  I’m a soul with a body.

And you can break my body Hunny, you can even dent my spirit at times.  But every time you do, you’re simply strengthening my soul.

And my soul is ready to RISE!

I’m done being told not to speak my truth.

I’m done with saying ‘okay’ when some dickhead tells me that nobody cares about my opinions.

Screw you.

My opinion matters.

My life matters.

My message matters.

I matter!

And so do YOU.  That’s what I want you to feel into on a soul level today Darling.


I want you to understand that something is more scary than fear itself.

Existence is more scary.

For me and for you.

For we were never born to be ordinary and fit in and work the system.

We were never born to run away and to hide under the shelter with everyone else.

And every day that you choose to do so, every day that you choose to buy into the illusion that fear and anger and pain is to be avoided, you’re dying inside.

You’re dying because you are a multi-dimensional being who are capable to feel the full range of emotion.  You were born to feel the full range of emotions.  When you choose only to experience some, you are robbing yourself of a brilliant life filled with experiences that continue to add to you as a being for change.

A spiritual rebel.

A born leader.

A creator.

An artist.

A over-achiever who choose to thrive!!

Why oh why would you continue to choose to believe the insanity that you have to be safe.  All.  The.  Time.

Ultimately you ARE safe.

You agreed to come to this world and do your soul work and believe me when I tell you that you are protected by an Almighty Universe who wants nothing more than to see you succeed.

Safety is not out there.

It’s inside of you.

Just like everything else you need to thrive.

It’s all there.  Waiting for you to look.  Begging for you to stop, breathe, connect.

Let the others sit quietly waiting for the wave to lift their boat.

Not you.


You’re the captain of your ship and you know for you to get to where you desire you have to leave behind the safety of the harbour. You know that the power of the wind will serve you if you turn your sails the right way.  You know that all storms will pass no matter how violent in nature and there will be a calm that humbles you into silent appreciation.

Know what it takes Darling?

To make this choice.

To take this step.


Not absence of fear.

Presence of Courage.

Which is what I’ve been called to connect you with.

I’m told it’s time.

I’m told that you’re ready to take up your sword of truth and to change the world.

I’m told that you’re done settling for anything less than magical.

Which is why I’m finally owning my soul purpose, growing a colossal pair of balls and presenting Courage, Clarity and Confidence.

This 6 week journey is like nothing you’ve ever experienced.

This is my life work – bringing together the trilogy of power that resides within you.

Body (yoga)

Mind (mindset work)

Spirit (soul magic)

The doors are opening today.

It’s going to be scary as fuck.

And even as you read this I know that there’s a slight tremble of excitement coursing through your veins because you know it’s true!

Because I’m here to work with warriors not worriers.

And I know you are.

I know because I believe in you.

I believe that you are here to lead – your loved ones, your community, your tribe, your world.

But you have to make one choice first.

You have to choose how will you interpret FEAR.

Will you say Fuck Everything And Run


Will you say Fuck Everything And RISE!

For death is inevitable.

Thriving is a warrior choice.

With my deepest love and respect,


PS:  Courage, Clarity and Confidence




Raindrops, teachers, duvets and magic – these are a few of my favourite things…

I know – the title makes no sense at all.

It’s all the things that I’m surrounded with at the moment that has me smiling like a Cheshire Cat.

The awareness started with my weekly Zoom meeting with my mom last night (have you met my mom?  Fuck she’s one amazing bad-ass lady who I absolutely adore with my whole being).

Funnily enough we were talking about the weather and the fact that South Africa is desperate for Winter which appears to have forgotten about them.

Meanwhile back in paradise, I’m sitting freezing my ass off and watching the rain pour down in what seems to be a never-ending stream  at the moment.

“Yes” she said “but at least you don’t have to go out of the house if you don’t want to.”

Damn straight!

I don’t have to go out of the house if I don’t want to.

And there’s a really good reason for it.

I like being happy.

I’ve decided that I happen to like living life in a way that has me purring like a kitten face dipped in cream.

Which is exactly why I’m sitting in my bed, all cuddled up under my warm blankie and duvet, reading Danielle LaPorte, journaling, drinking freshly ground coffee with soy milk, and listening to the pitter patter of the rain on my sliding door.


As I was sitting here there was an instant, just a fraction of a moment, when I felt a ping of guilt.

Here I was huddled up in my happy place when hundreds of thousands of others were dragging their moping asses around bitching and moaning about how bad the traffic was going to be with the rain, hating the jobs their going to, feeling a sense of “what’s the fucking point?” and doing it anyway because they think they don’t have a choice.

Like I said, it only lasted a split second.

Because the truth is that like all those hundreds of thousands of people I used to settle for mere existence clasped in the chains of victimhood.

I used to think that the only way to be successful in life was to finish school, get my degree, go work in a ‘well-paying’ job from eight in the morning until five at night (except as an achiever you and I both know it ends up being six in the morning until seven at night), get married, have children, get dogs for the children, get cats for the dogs, get guinnea pigs for the cats, and wondering when the fuck my sanity left the building!

Nothing made sense.

Life sure as hell didn’t make sense.

Work didn’t make sense.

The chocolate brownie wrapper under my pillow was a complete mystery.

Except it all made sense after all.

I’m starting to think we’re born happy, and then we forget what the fuck happiness is so that we can get to choose happy again.

One morning we wake up thinking ‘what’s the fucking point?’ and BOOM, we get to choose.

We can either choose to wake up every morning and think “what’s the fucking point?”, get in our cars and sit in the traffic thinking “what’s the fucking point?”, go to the office and spend the largest part of our waking day with a bunch of people we can tolerate at the best of times looking at them and thinking “what’s the fucking point?” and then get home at the end of they day exhausted and irritated because supper isn’t ready and the kids are out of control and the dog shat on the carpet and think “what’s the fucking point?”


and this is a big or

because most people look at what it will take and think it’s too much effort

because it’s hard work and unless the pain of not doing this is greater than the pain of “what’s the fucking point?” you won’t do it

You can choose to start doing the real work, the inner work, the mind-set work, the going to where you’ve not had the balls to go before and forgiving and healing so you can become whole again work, and you can wake up to a dream life that you’ve created because by becoming whole you were able to see new truths and possibilities which you were not able to see before.

Sounds like a no-brainer right?

So why on earth are majority of people choosing a miserable existence over joy???


Egotistical pride.

People are too fucking proud to get the support that they require to make the break-through.

And let me be completely honest here – I’ve yet to meet a person living a life they absolutely adore who have NOT worked with other teachers, gurus, coaches, mentors.


My cup always overflows with gratitude for every teacher I’ve ever worked with over the past two decades because I know for sure that I would never have reached this point in my life without them.

Even the ‘bad’ ones.

When you make the decision to be happy, every teacher has a lesson for you, even the ones that you miss at first glance.  In fact I’ve probably received the most learning from the ‘bad’ coaches.

Yet there’s still this whole stigma of weakness when it comes to working with someone to break the cycle of existence.

My one client who’s come back for another round of coaching sheepishly confessed that the first time he worked with me he didn’t tell a single soul.  He was too embarrassed to admit he had a coach!

This time around he’s telling every Tom, Dick and Sally because the results are so powerful that he wants people to start understanding the impact coaching has on his life.

Contrary to popular belief that coaching is for the weak, I’ve always said that coaching is not for sissies.  It takes a solid pair of balls to work with someone who has nothing to lose by being brutally honest and trusting them to share your inner most thoughts that most of the time you don’t want to share with yourself in the quest for clarity and power over your subconscious mind so you can make more conscious decisions and live a life by your own design.

It’s not easy.

You have to take egotistical pride and flush it down a toilet.

And make no mistake – I work with fucking epic high achievers who have bucket loads of pride because they deserve to be proud of themselves.

Yet there’s a difference between pride from owning your shit and pride because you refuse to let the societal mask slip.

It’s when you understand that your power is always accentuated when you energetically connect with another that true magic starts unfolding in your life.

I can’t really explain it without getting locked up in a padded cell, but it just is.

And that connection don’t happen until the moment you connect with love (love of self, love of the Universe, love of humanity, love of life, love of nature, love of faeries, whatever love you connect with) and the scales of bullshit fall off your eyes and you see the world in true colour.

At that point you start asking yourself ‘what does my dream life look like after all?’

Maybe for you it’s being in that penthouse office creating an empire with thousands of employees.

Maybe for you it’s picking up your kids laundry and preparing them a fantastic meal.

Maybe for you it’s going to your job cleaning the bathrooms so that others can have a magnificent experience when nature calls.

Maybe for you it’s sitting in bed with coffee and pen, laptop and book, listening to the rain splashing on the rose leaves outside your door.

No one is better than the other.

Because it’s YOUR dream life.

That’s the magic Darling.

It starts with a choice.

Always a choice.

Everything is a choice.

Except death.

Death IS inevitable.

But thriving is a choice.

With love always,



PS:  It’s coming!!!!  The big reveal will be happening on Monday but let me tell you that transformation is on it’s way!  Mind-set, yoga, journaling, swearing, laughter, red wine, love and everything in-between.  In the meantime if you’re a lady who would love to be in a community of rebels, artists, creatives and high achievers on a quest to living life on their own terms then come join us in Business Rebels today and be the very first to get the inside scoop on my newest course launching in August.