The Silent Warrior – Is the social image of success keeping you stuck?

This is my personal truth.

Success is a fickle thing.  We all say we want it yet so few of us have taken the time to define what true success looks like for us.

I have been a successful coach for almost a decade now.  I work with fucking amazing clients who fill my soul with joy.  It finances my family’s needs, unexpected holidays, original art pieces for my home because I like pretty shit around me, my sport which most people think is absurd as my bikes tend to cost more than my cars, nourishing food, massages, jeans and the best running shoes.  Happiness is!

Then I joined the online marketing community and all of a sudden my mind was bombarded with a new image of success.  Beautiful women with big hair, exquisite dresses, gold and diamonds and they all said that they have it figured out, they are phenomenally happy and they can teach me why my success was less than I deserved and I deserve to have it all dammit!  I second guessed myself, jumped onto their bandwagon and started to transform myself.  Daily blow dries, doing make-up, wearing high heels and pretty dresses.  I looked fucking spectacular if I have to say so myself.  And for the briefest of moments I started making more money and I was thinking “A-ha!  I’ve been doing it wrong!  Now I’m set for sure.”

And then it came to a screeching halt and everything dried up overnight.  What.  The.  Fuck?

That was when I realized that it was time for some real soul searching.  Why was I repelling success?  You know the answer right?  I bought into the on-line media’s portrayal of success and I hated it!  I didn’t want to be exhausted every day from trying to look pretty.  I wanted to be exhausted because I’ve been running my ass off, riding my bike and working with amazing clients who adore me for my mind, my insane sense of humor, my never-say-can’t attitude, my adventures, and my complete unavailability for their bullshit.  I want to live the best version of me and that includes very little make-up most days, my hair is in a pony tail, and my faithful jeans and boots because I don’t have time to walk slow over the cobble-stones.  Unless of course I’m going out and choose to do it because I’m a woman and I have many different sides to me (I love being a woman!) – and then I look smoking hot!

Please don’t get me wrong here – if the pretty dresses, the big hair, the 5 star hotels light you up, then you work those manicured fingers darling and you go for it!  In fact I work with some of you and I love kicking your asses to work harder for the next level your success.  I have no judgement around this.  BUT if the idea of riding your bike through the mud and falling your ass off laughing all the time is what lights your fire, then THAT is what you need to focus on when building your business.

I don’t know about you but I did not become an entrepreneur to do it the same as everyone else.  And I sure as hell did not do it to sit in front of my laptop all day when I know my best inspiration comes to me on my bike and that is when I can serve my tribe on the highest level.

So here is a different question for you:  Instead of always looking at your past to see what is your ‘block’, look at your future and what you are working towards.  Because I can honestly tell you that since I went back to my truth, my success, my clients could find me again.  In my jeans and boots.  Kicking their gorgeous asses.

How does success look like to YOU?

Walk with honor.

Not in Kansas anymore … Lessons learnt from the Wizard of Oz about Online Entrepreneurship

by Judy Yaron PhD

 

When I was a little girl (and that was a very long time ago), every year on Christmas Day The Wizard of Oz (1939) was screened on TV. Since then I have read the books, read them to my own kids and grandkids, followed the TV series, sung the songs and watched the movie again and again and … again. And, I have never stopped loving it.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with L. Frank Baum’s wonderful fairytale or the Hollywood magical adaptation, this is how the story goes:

Dorothy Gale, an orphaned teenager, lives on a Kansas farm with her Auntie Em and Uncle Henry. Forced to hand over her beloved dog, Toto, to Miss Gulch, a nasty neighbor, who has a sheriff’s order to have the dog euthanized, because he bit her, Dorothy dreams of a better world “somewhere over the rainbow”.

When Toto escapes from Miss Gulch, Dorothy decides to run away. She meets Professor Marvel, a phony fortune teller, who urges her to return home and reunite with her family. Caught in the whirlwind of a cyclone, Dorothy bumps her head and falls into an enchanted dream.

Dorothy wakes up in the Land of Oz after her house falls upon and kills the Wicked Witch of the East, who leaves behind a pair of magical ruby slippers.

Dorothy is welcomed by the Munchkins and Glinda, the Good Witch of the North, who want to know if she’s a good witch or a bad witch. Realizing that she’s not in Kansas anymore, all Dorothy longs for is to go home.

The only one, who can help Dorothy find her way home, is the wonderful Wizard of Oz, who resides in the Emerald City. Dorothy is told by Glinda and the Munchkins that all she needs to do is follow the Yellow Brick Road. With the ruby slippers on her feet, Dorothy and Toto set out on their journey. On the way, Dorothy meets a Scarecrow, who wants a brain, a Tinman, who yearns for a heart, and a fearful Lion aching for a bit of courage. Dorothy suggests that they accompany her to The Emerald City. The Wizard, for sure, will be able to fulfill their dreams. On their way the foursome encounter one hurdle after another, the main being the Wicked Witch of the West, who wants to take revenge on Dorothy for killing her sister and taking ownership of the magical ruby slippers.

Eventually, Dorothy and her friends reach their destination only to discover that the Wizard is nothing more than a pathetic humbug. The story does, however, have a happy end with a powerful message. Dorothy learns that all along she has had the power within her to find her way home. Glinda tells her to click her heels together three times and chant, “There is no place like home,” and her wish will be granted. Dorothy wakes up from her dream to the welcoming embraces of her family and friends.

Over the years, The Wizard of Oz has been subject to many symbolic interpretations – from politics to economy, religious beliefs and even feminism. As a storyteller by nature and a teacher at heart, it’s no wonder that I too am intrigued by the power of its metaphors. This tale has deepen my understanding of the driving forces of entrepreneurship within the online world.

This is how the entrepreneurship version of the story goes:

Dorothy is a young woman living a mundane life. She hates her job. She hates the tedious chores of every day. She hates it when others interfere with her life, tell her what to do and try to take from her the little that she calls her own. She dreams of a better life “somewhere over the rainbow”.

Caught up in the cyclone of entrepreneurship, Dorothy is whisked away by her dream to an enchanted sphere like nothing she has ever known before. When she first lands in the magical world of online entrepreneurship, she feels daring; she feels empowered; she is wearing her ruby stilettoes.

Dorothy is greeted by masses of Munchkins – the entrepreneur wannabees. Warmed by their hearty welcome she turns to them for answers. But, they have none of their own. All they can tell her is to “follow the Yellow Brick Road”, which leads to the Emerald City and the Wonderful Wizards of Oz.

Very soon, Dorothy meets the Glindas of the entrepreneurial space, those kind-hearted coaches, who appear to have achieved the success, she dreams of. Dorothy puts her trust in them. She listens to their every word, as she shuts her eyes and manifests her wishes.

Filled with hope and belief, Dorothy sets out to make her fortune. She is determined. She is resourceful. She is naïve. On her way, she is reminded that even the most passionate dream is not enough. She still needs brain, heart and courage in order to open the gates of the Emerald City.

But alas, when Dorothy reaches the Emerald City, she comes to realize that she has been led astray. She soon discovers that the Emerald City is a fraudulent world immersed in glittering greed. It’s a sparkling illusion created and ruled by scheming charlatans, who use clever marketing devices (like green-tinted eyeglasses) and networking tricks to spread myths to fool the masses into believing that they hold the secrets to success, when in reality they are selfish self-serving humbugs, who prey on and exploit gullible, vulnerable folk with dreams and aspirations. No one dares to challenge them or their powers. No one, but a small dog, who pulls the curtain away and reveals the truth.

Dorothy also learns that her Glinda is not exactly as trust-worthy as she originally pretended to be. Glinda repeatedly reassures her that she can do it, that she holds power within her to fulfill her wish, but she never tells her how. Instead, she sends her off into a world of peril, promising her that she’s got her back, when in reality, Dorothy stands alone to fight her battles. Whether deliberately or unintentionally, the Glindas of the online entrepreneurial space have also been captivated in the Wizards’ acts of deceptions.

Ironically, the most powerful driving force in the story is The Wicked Witch of the West, who doesn’t fall for the Wizards’ plots. It is the Wicked Witch of the West, who puts Dorothy to work and pushes her beyond her comfort zone. She is the one, who compels Dorothy to face her most dreaded fears, and consequently discover her inner strengths. It is the Wicked Witch of the West, who is the true change maker and the one, who leads Dorothy to Entrepreneurial success.

If you are a Dorothy, I’m the Wicked Witch of the West.

 

***

Judy YaronMeet the brilliant Judy Yaron! – If your dream is to create an online course that kicks ass, a coaching package that takes your clients to epic success, or a training program that gets your peeps begging for more, I may be the one for you. If you are also willing to do the work and are not afraid to think, get creative, deal with cut the crap feedback and be pushed beyond your comfort zone, then we are definitely the perfect fit.

With my no-nonsense, non-apologetic approach you will learn how to create engaging and empowering learning materials that are concrete, clear, consistent and compelling; you will learn how to deliver information in ways that are stress free for both you and your learners; and, you will learn how to motivate your trainees to take action, so that they too can move forward. All the while I will be there for you: to nurture, support, and hold you accountable to get your program done, as I take you to higher levels of creation than you thought were possible.

I am a teacher. And that’s what teachers do.

With theoretical background, practical hands-on experience and international endorsement,

I will teach you how to spin your knowledge into gold.

Judy Yaron PhD (aka Dr. Judy G Spot – G stands for Granny)

Websitewww.cutthecrapsolutions.com

Facebook Group – Granny’s Girls’ Gym – https://www.facebook.com/groups/439363392855525/

Blog – That’s what Granny always says – http://judyyaron2.wix.com/grannyalwayssays

Twitterhttps://twitter.com/drjudygspot

Instagramhttps://www.instagram.com/drjudygspot/

Pinteresthttps://www.pinterest.com/drjudygspot/

LinkedInhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/judy-gershoni-yaron-phd-b531241a

Emailjudy@cutthecrapsolutions.com

Want to be Sexy? Don’t Play the Victim

By Susan Jacobs

Why do so many of us women give away our power, not trust our intuition, and end up in unhealthy relationships that are physically, verbally, or emotionally abusive? What would it take for us to stand proud of all that we are despite our perceived flaws that hold us back be it cellulite, muffin top, varicose veins, wrinkles, or whatever else we conjure up under the microscope of self-criticism?

After going steady on and off for years with playing the victim role, somewhere along the way, I took that relationship up a notch and became fully committed. This was odd given that I’m a predominantly confidant, strong, and intelligent woman who should have known better.

I was true blue to my victim-ness and wore it well. ‘Woo is me, if only he then I… If only this, then that… Why is this happening to me?’ was my ongoing internal dialogue, the mantra that I lived with for longer than I care to admit. Becoming comfortable, even complacent as a victim and learning how to manipulate situations to feed my victim hunger could have earned me an Oscar. I wasn’t happy and wasted a lot of time that finally culminated in a hard-slapping, crash-and-burn relationship where my victim skills had evolved to a new level worthy of a PhD. Although my heart continued to beat as I moved through my daily personal and professional responsibilities, I was detached, going through the motions of life while muffled by pain.

I believe we attract people into our lives at exactly the right time for very clear reasons. My knight-in-shining-dysfunctional-armor was in my life for 4 years, during which time I completely surrendered all facets of the woman I once was. It wasn’t pretty, but I was a great actor.

The ending was ugly and filled with drama, embarrassing and humiliating behavior, buckets of tears, and hitting rock bottom — the perfect environment to further host and up my victim game. My tale was filled with pain, deception, financial hardship, and betrayal – all juicy elements that call for sympathy. I was queen victim and very comfortable on my throne, playing weak and helpless for all who would listen.

I felt empty and was perpetually battling inner conflict, flip-flopping between shame, one of the all-time most awful emotions, and wanting revenge, to hurt my not-shining-knight as badly as he was hurting me. I came frighteningly close to crossing the line of no return, to doing something that I would never be able to take back or heal from.
Thankfully, my guardian angels that come in both human and non-human form protected me from acting impulsively.

Then one day, perhaps from divine intervention, the real bitch slap came via a text message from a friend that had heard my story ad nauseum. ‘Victims aren’t sexy.’ Those 3 words were transformative. No middle aged woman, or at least not this one, wants to hear that she’s not sexy. And so I filed for divorce from my role as a victim and the healing process began to unfold. It was some of the most painful self-realizations and forgiving that I’ve ever had to do, but well worth every second. The woman I once was had been chewed up and spit out. But over time I reclaimed my power and the carcass that I had become came back to life in full Technicolor glory.

Are you playing victim either consciously or unconsciously? Ask yourself these questions:
1. Do you believe you are powerless, out of control, that everything happens to you and you aren’t a willing participant?
2. Do you blame others for your current situation?
3. Are you continually saying ‘if this happens then everything will be different, better, and I’ll be happy, in love, rich, successful…’ you fill in the blanks…
4. Do you feel helpless and trapped with no way out?
5. Are you hungry to tell your story to anyone that will listen in order to get sympathy and validation that you’re right?

If you answered yes to any of the above, you’re likely in victim mode. Do you want to snap out of it? In addition to the text, a few days later I woke up and was finally pissed. I started beating my pillow and as in the movie Network I began yelling, ‘I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take this anymore.’ I realized there was nothing wrong with me except that I had given all my power over to a narcissistic asshole. I looked in the mirror and said ‘today’s the day I’m reclaiming my life.’ And that was the beginning of the next chapter. I kicked victim out of my life and haven’t looked back since.

I’m no therapist or coach, but from my personal experience, if the concept of not being sexy isn’t enough to motivate change and reclaim your power, and if you’re not yet mad enough, then perhaps try any or all of these suggestions:
1. Get butt naked, stand in front of the mirror, and have an honest conversation with yourself about what you really want. Naked is required because you can’t hide from yourself
2. Smile and say hello to strangers every day while commuting to work and see how feels
3. Commit to a 30-day challenge of some sort – journaling, exercising, calling friend or family member every day – whatever it is, just stick to it and track the days
4. Take some kind of pen to paper — play with crayons or magic markers – draw even if you suck at it, or write in a journal. But make something that is off the computer and cell phone
5. Put post-its around your house with things that make you happy be it pretty pictures, something you want to buy, or inspirational words

But most of all, remember this is a process, be gentle with yourself, and know that the journey is as important as the destination.

Susan JacobsBIO
I’m a world traveler, salsa dancing, yoga practicing, wanna-be Buddhist, and perpetual work-in-progress. I believe we are co-creators of our lives and that anything is possible when we get out of our own way. Giving voice to things that matter, sharing stories, and spreading ideas is my heart and soul.

For-hire, I’m a copywriter, content developer, and brand strategist for forward-thinking entrepreneurs, brands, and companies that are looking to make the world a better place. I specialize in cutting through the noise and clutter with authentic, engaging, easily accessible content that speaks directly to their target audience. From a 25-year career in PR, marketing, and branding I’m able to work across industries and am often hired as a ‘fresh’ perspective, an outsider, who creates content that anyone can understand.

I’m a contributing author to the recently published book “Pain, Purpose, Passion: That Was Then, This Is Now,” and my personal essays have appeared in FourTwoNine Magazine, Aquarian Times, Spirituality & Health, PR Week, and IndieWire. I’m working on her first memoir about my holistic healing journey through a hyperthyroid and Graves’ disease for The Round House Press. I’m also a guest blogger for Yogic Living and Identity Magazine. I live in Brooklyn and can be found at:
Website | LinkedIn | Twitter

The Power Of Kindness

 

By Julia Fischer

 

I was on the bus the other day, listening to music and just enjoying the view when someone asked me if the seat next to me was free.  It was, so I said yes.

 

I soon recognized a not so nice smell, the sharp smell of alcohol.

Looking at my seatmate I realized it was him and that he was not under the best looking condition. Still I smiled at him.

 

He then started talking to me, saying something about the weather. I nodded and looked out of the window again.  While looking out of the window and gathering my thoughts I recognized that he started talking to me again.  So I turned off my music and started to listen. He asked question about my bag (it had little metal items on it), how nice it looks, about my tights and that you can get them in so many different varieties these days, about my iphone and if I really need everything that’s on there, if I use it a lot for games (I don’t have one on it) and such senseless things.

 

Though my answers weren’t long (as I really didn’t feel like talking that day) I’ve had the feeling that with just looking at him, smiling and just being a bit kind that this meant so much to him.

 

Looking at an older man that sat diagonally across me who had aroused compassion for my situation I thought: why is it so hard for some people to just be a bit kinder to strangers these days, when it doesn’t take a lot to make them feel good, by just smiling at them?  And why do people have to have compassion with those who do so?

 

Yes, he was an alcoholic and I felt anything than comfortable in this situation (because he was coming really close and asked me for a coffee (I was surprised it wasn’t a beer) when he had to leave the bus, and yes, he smelled really awful, but still he is a human and god knows what has happened in his life that he now is like he is.  That doesn’t make him any worse than other people and it still gives him the fckn right to also get a nice word or even a smile every now and then.

 

We only can see how people look from the outside but not what is going on inside of them.

 

And no one has the right to judge someone without taking a closer look (or if then even).

We live in a society that always tells you to be yourself but are constantly trying to change you.

 

And it doesn’t make you a better person by just walking away and giving a weird look to people who don’t fit in your perfect world.

 

Everyone has his own story to tell and you can only ever tell from the outside, which can’t give you an idea in some extent, what this person is or was going through in his or her life.

No matter if you’re rich or broke, curvy or skinny, sober or drunk.

And if just a few more people could give an honest, warm smile to strangers, no matter in what condition they’re in at this moment, this can change a whole lot for this person.

The best part? It doesn’t cost you a penny and you’ve done something very brave and good.

 

Julia FisherToday’s blog was contributed by the beautiful, honest Julia Fischer.  Jula is a health coach who help women overcome eating disorders (like binge,-emotional eating), as well as gain back their self-esteem and how to integrate more whole food into their lives.

 

You can connect with Julia on facebook, twitter and instagram @blossomyoursoul and at her website www.blossomyoursoul.com

 

You Can Have It All… And All At Once #VixYourLife

By Victoria “Vix” Reitano

I live in a world of glass and chrome… a world where women can be pretty AND strong… where girls can be anything they want to be.

Is it a fantasy? Nope. It’s New York City.

Now, of course, I’ve encountered men who have asked why I have lipstick on in the office, implying that the only reason a 20-something woman would wear lipstick is to get laid.

My response?

You have a tie, we have lipstick.

Put men in a bra, stockings and a pencil skirt and see how competent they feel!

I’m not a man-hater (although some may call me that), I’m just a girl who has always believed that “no” was unacceptable for her goals and dreams.

I’m Vix, as my friends now call me (and we’re going to be friends, I promise you!) because of my ability to go in and “vix” every situation that life has thrown at me. I’m the CEO and founder of CreatiVix Media, a digital agency dedicated to making social media manageable for all… because, after all, that’s why I am where I am at the ripe old age of 27.

2015 was a magical year for me, as all things ending in 15 often are. I’m a taurus, born in a rainy Sunday in May and the greatest love affair I’ve ever had in my life has been with New York City. Sure, I’ve had boyfriends but New York City is the only lover I’ll ever need. I was born in the era of Carrie Bradshaw, of Ally McBeal. And yet, I find most women are afraid.

Women are afraid they won’t be liked… that they’re not [insert adjective/adverb here] enough. And it makes me so mad!! Why should anyone tell you how to behave? If you’re doing a job you’re proud of, living a life of choices you’re proud of — or even, if you’re not proud but prepared to deal with the consequences — you’re enough. It’s that simple.

So where does #VixYourLife come in? I say what I feel and I mean what I say — I live my life on my terms… and no one else’s.

#VixYourLife is my tag for doing anything and everything you can to make your life one you love. For me, it’s always been digital media. I’ve been telling stories and serving as an advocate for those who cannot speak their own mind for as long as I can remember. My friends come to me for advice on a variety of things… it’s taken me time to really be as ferocious as I often advise, but I’m here now and there’s no going back.

I want you to do something for me, can you do that? Can you commit to picking ONE thing in your life that you won’t judge yourself for? One thing you’ll do unapologetically. Because all it takes is ONE… and from there? From there you’re jumping off the Chrysler Building to build the plane as your company takes flight.

Want more of this? Join me on my blog #VixintheCity… or really, because I’m a busy, bad-ass entrepreneur, join me on Twitter (http://twitter.com/vixinthecity), Facebook(http://facebook.com/VixintheCity) and Instagram (http://instagram.com/VixintheCity).

My goal for 2016? To share more words that empower more women (well, really, people… but we just need the encouragement a bit more at times) to create the options in their professional lives to have personal lives that they love.

You can have it all.

You can have it all at once.

You just have to believe you can… and when the opportunity comes? Take it.

xoxo

Vix

Vix MAIN HEADSHOTReady or not, our newest member to our amazing blog family Victoria Reitano has spunk and passion!

Victoria “Vix” Reitano is the CEO, Founder and Lead Consultant at CreatiVix Media, a digital agency based in NYC dedicated to making social media manageable for all. CreatiVix Media offers concierge social media, managed social media, managed social media ads and digital campaign management for celebrities, entreprenuers and brands. Vix offers 1:1 training for entrepreneurs, bloggers, celebrities, brands, journalists, students and more to help them become engaged partners in the building – and maintainence – of their digital brand. She’s a native New Yorker who is SoulCycle obsessed and loves everything about the City she is lucky enough to call home. You can connect with her on Twitter @VixintheCity, Facebook.com/VixintheCity or on Instagram.com/VixintheCity.

The Silent Warrior – Out of the ashes

This is my personal truth.

As the year draws to an end, I sit at my brand new dining room table, pretty pink and white flowers in the vase, in a country on the other side of the world from where I was a few weeks ago, and I feel at home.

2015 has been a year of complete transformation.  Of asking for more than I ever have before and of standing in awe as the Universe delivered time and again.  Yet in order for me to sit here today, a lot had to end.  Cycles had to come full circles.  Parts of me had to die.  It has been a year filled with pain, both physically and emotionally, and it was worth every fucking tear.

My coach recently asked me what I have survived, what makes me who I am today.  Truth be told, I have survived more than anyone knows.  In fact, when I took the time to think of it all I realized I’m a fucking warrior who have gone into battle time and again, I have bled, I’ve been broken, but I have stood tall in my purpose and I kept getting stronger!  I am grateful for every horror that I have endured, because it has made me the woman I am today and I am able to serve women around the world from a place of knowing, a place of acceptance, a place of strength.

The way I see it though, a lot of women survive abuse, rape, trauma, addiction, depression, losing physical parts of themselves – this year I had to let go of my uterus.  Yet they hold on to the pain, the drama as if these experiences define who they are.  For most of my life I have held on to my past for dear life!  I wore it like a cloak of protection around me.  Holding on to the anger against those who have given me my most painful lessons as a coping mechanism because the fear was that if I let go of the anger, the pain would overwhelm me and I would once again fall into the dark pits of despair.

In February life started changing for me.  It started with a change in belief that I was worth more than what I credited myself for.  And for the first time in ages I invested in myself in a really big way by signing up to the next level of certification and mentorship.  By taking this small step to say “hey God, look at me!  I’m worth it” I created space for miracles into my everyday life.

Where my home was falling into decay after years of neglect (of my inner and outer world), I started bringing beauty back into my surroundings.  Friendships changed and I met some of the most incredible women, some of them local, majority of them in other parts of the world.  With this, my eyes starting opening to the expansiveness of the globe instead of being stuck in my limited worldview.  I started registering pain in my body where previously I would push through any discomfort, which lead me to discover I urgently needed a hysterectomy.  I still postponed the operation for IronMan, but the Universe was determined to let me know I’ve punished myself enough, and I had the humbling experience of getting ill and not being able to finish the bike course.  Yet even in this hard lesson, my angels took pity on me and I got to meet one of the elite women who had the flu and stopped on the same part of the course.  Seriously, do you have any idea how meniscule the chances are of this happening???  I’ve been following her ever since and she fucking rocks!!  Having won more than one IronMan title on the international circuit since.  Thank you Angels!

I tested my wings further, and was blessed with all the money I needed to go on a once in a lifetime holiday with my Mom.  Little did we know at the time that a few months later I would move to New Zealand!  I received the opportunity to work with one of the greatest coaches in the world!  And all of this through miracles.  When I first came across her work my belief was that I would NEVER be able to afford her!  Yet I insisted that I was worth having her to guide me to the next level in my business, and apparently God agreed with me.

During all this time I have been doing introspection.  Why did I have to lose my uterus?  Why did I have to get sick on the bike?  Why did I have to lose some dear friends in my journey of growth?  Why did I have to have the painful experiences I’ve had in life?

As I sit here today, it is clear that a lot had to end in my life in order for me to have a new beginning.  I had to end relationships which had brought me decades of abuse and pain.  I had to end disease in my body which I was not aware of, by letting go of my uterus.  I had to end the pain by letting go of the cause.  I had to end suffering by letting go of guilt.  I had to let go of the constant feeling of danger by letting go of my country of birth.  I had to let go of friendships that were draining me of energy and keeping my stuck out of my feelings of loyalty.  I had to let go of the feeling of not being enough by embracing the love that God really does want me to experience, and a lot of that comes through beauty.

Miracles often require sacrifice.  Birth requires death.  Bravery requires overcoming fear.

I am so grateful that I have been blessed with courage, with the soul of a warrior, so that I may serve my tribe in a way never experienced before.

2015 has been a year of death.  It has been the year where I had to heal myself so that I can rise in 2016 to take my place to heal others.  My mission is to un-fuck 10 million women in the next 10 years.  And I’m ready.

Until next time, always walk with honor.

If you’re reading this and know that now is your time for change, find out more about me and how I work here.

How Do You Disconnect From Your Body?

This is my very private story that I haven’t shared with you yet.

 

How I fell, how I rose and how I found my Own Path to be the woman I wanted to be!

 

Exactly a year ago, on 29th Oct 2014 my life fell into pieces.  My partner broke up with me because he chose another woman.

 

Because of him I left my corporate life

Because of him I started my own business

In fact I did so many things because of him

I was giving more than receiving

I was tolerating relationships that were destroying my soul

My life was an endless list of goals to achieve

My body was tired and lonely

 

I remember very well that feeling after our chat on the phone. I felt scared, lonely and abandoned. Suddenly nothing made sense in my life. I could see the puzzles but they just didn’t match to one another.

 

And I remember very well that feeling when I woke up the day after. The sun was still shining, the European continent didn’t break into pieces, morning coffee tasted as usual. And again I burnt toasts.

 

Life was following its own wise rhythm… and somehow it didn’t want to share my sadness and disappointment. Which made me think that maybe my sadness is only my judgment about the situation… or my judgment about myself.

 

And on that morning I made a conscious decision that from now on I am going to follow my Own Path.

 

YES, MY OWN PATH.

 

Step into my own power
Listen to my intuition

Fall in love with my body
Live a life on my own conditions
Be the woman I have always wanted to be.

 

The funny thing is that I have always known my Path… but I was too scared.
And I rationalized it too much. “It will never work”. “This is just crazy” and so on.

But well, on that day I said to myself – now or never.

 

Yep. Now or never.

 

You can’t imagine how scared I was!

No, wait. My mind was scared.

My intuition was more than happy!

 

HERE’S THE DEAL I MADE WITH MYSELF:

no excuses

no self-judgment

no self-sabotage

no self-blaming

 

Only pure honesty with myself!

What a relief to my inner voice and soul.

 

And so far..

 

THIS HAS BEEN THE BEST YEAR OF MY LIFE!

 

 

WAS IT EASY?

 

NO

 

Some of my friendships failed. Some people felt offended or disappointed by my change (into a bitch as they said).

Well… the way they perceived themselves and me was their choice and didn’t have much to do with me…

I had to let many things go, to become aware of my own stories I kept telling myself and consciously redesign them to work on my favor.

 

If you want to invite new friends into your house, you want to do the cleaning first, don’t you?

 

 

CHOOSING YOUR OWN PATH MAY COST YOU TIME AND ENERGY

But the cost of staying on the previous track was much higher.

And…

 

I met wonderful people

I strengthened existing friendships

I met a wonderful man

I remember every minute of the last 12 months

And I enjoyed them all.

And I believe my life is truly a miracle.

 

 

 

WHAT DID I DO TO FOLLOW MY OWN PATH?

WHAT CAN YOU DO TO FOLLOW YOUR OWN PATH?

 

There are 3 parts of You to look at (and I strongly suggest you working in exactly this order):

 

STEP #1 YOUR MIND & MINDSET

  • Practice awareness – be here & now, find pleasure in simplicity. Concentration, meditation or dance may be helpful here
  • Become aware of stories you keep telling to yourself when nobody watches
  • Change your self-beliefs so your mind will no longer sabotage you, your self-esteem or your hidden dreams
  • Build healthy borders with the world by saying “no” to things you don’t feel aligned with. They are not good for you anyway
  • Become aware that forcing, pushing, fighting and resistance is always a sign that you are not on the right track
  • Redirect your attention – from the outside to the inside. From things happening around you to things happening inside you (there is so much happening there!)

 

STEP #2 YOUR BODY

  • Create time & space just for yourself. Even 5 minutes will be make a big change
  • Find pleasure in looking after your body. Don’t treat your body as a “to-do” list full of irritating obligations
  • Love your body. This is your friend, not your worst enemy to fight with
  • Listen to your body. Tensions and aches may be a sign of emotions or stress that you have hidden in your body
  • Let yourself be feminine the way you want to. It is YOU who decides about you. And nobody else
  • Be sensual. No, I do not mean sexual. I mean – pay more attention to all your senses, so you can have a more juicy, fulfilling life
  • Build a healthy relationship with your breasts. Yes, I know how it sounds. But believe me – breasts are really the key to your relationship with yourself as a woman

 

STEP #3 YOUR SOUL

  • Instead of giving find pleasure in receiving. Build a healthy balance between giving and receiving
  • Listen to your inner voice/intuition/gut/soul. Just listen. Yes, I know, it’s hard, but it’s worth it
  • Accept the fact that your mind can’t rationalize your intuition. Your intuition will never give answers to “why” questions, which your mind loves so much
  • Open up and trust. Let yourself be guided by your intuition, let your life surprise you and bring some fresh air
  • There are no bad or good things in your life. Only lessons. Everything that you experience happens for a reason. So just…enjoy the ride, play with it
  • Take a deep breath and relax. In every moment you are exactly in the place where you should be. Nowhere else
  • Be kind. Yes, be kind to everybody. Also to your not-the-best-friends . They have their own problems and struggles too.

 

 

 

FOLLOWING YOUR OWN PATH MAY NOT BE THE EASIEST…

 

But..

 

There is nothing more priceless than being You.
Being the Woman you have always wanted to be.

 

NOW IT’S TIME FOR YOU TO FIND YOUR OWN PATH!

 

The Universe is waiting for you with their hands full of beautiful gifts. And it is your decision to take the courage and step into your power. To take the first step on Your Own Path.

 

And once you open up for changes and you trust your intuition, things start to happen in such a smooth way, that you may not even notice them happening. There is no pushing, no forcing, no resistance if you walk Your Own Path. Because you become fully aligned with yourself and your soul.

 

 

 

SO… HOW ABOUT YOU? HAVE YOU FOUND YOU OWN PATH?

How about us celebrating together the best year of your life in October next year?

I will bring a bottle of Prosecco 🙂

 

 

PS:  And you know what?

I couldn’t be more grateful to my ex that he broke up with me that October night!

And that is probably why we met.

 

KathleenI am truly blessed and excited to introduce you to the newest member of our blogging family.

Kathleen Zajac is an internationally recognized body & heart alignment mentor and certified healer. Her mission is to help women reconnect with their bodies, hearts and souls.  She shows women how – by accepting and falling in love with your body – you can step into your inner power and become the woman who you’ve always wanted to be.

Kathleen passionately studied sociology of body, health and illness for her M.A. and PhD studies. She has been practicing meditation for more than 18 years now. On her quest to find her feminine sparkle she tried tango, flamenco, belly dance, yoga, tantra, a few broken relationships and different methods of body energy healing.

“I love that moment when I wake up a sparkle in the eyes and a soul of another woman, and gently remind her that she is beautiful, feminine and can stay vulnerable, yet strong”.

To follow her work and connect with her:

www.kathleenzajac.com

www.facebook.com/zajac.kathleen

 

 

One in one BILLION: a LOVE story

Fact: There are 42,000 taxi cab drivers in NYC. Therefore, the probability of having the same driver twice is one in one billion. 9 zeros baby!

Two weeks ago, I was headed to first morning meeting in NYC. I was in a part of Manhattan that I rarely am in that morning. I saw a cab turning the corner, and I quickly hailed it.

It was a crisp, sunny Fall morning, and I was feeling giddy–full of life and gratitude for the incredible week I had planned. The cabbie and I chatted a bit about the gorgeous weather before he asked me what I did.

“I’m an entrepreneur, a coach, an author, and a speaker” I said.

“Oh really,” he said. “I’m an entrepreneur too. I’m working on a new venture that is essentially the Spotify of Politics…”

“Interesting. I wrote a book about everyday entrepreneurs that is on its way to become a TV series and/or documentary film. I’m always open to more content. Do you have a card?” I asked.

He did. ‘Jack Alvo’ it said.

“I know you. We’re connected on Linked-In. You were my cab driver several years ago” I exclaimed–my Rainman memory working its magic.

I didn’t expect his memory to match mine.

“Yes, I drove you to 13th and A in the East Village” he smiled.

I was stunned. His memory mirrored mine. I hadn’t lived in the village since early 2012.

At this point, I knew there was a lesson, so I whispered to the Universe “What’s the lesson God?”

To Jack I said, “Wow, that was over 3 and a half years ago. I must have talked your ear off about Chix 6 and SuperYou, huh?”

“You certainly did. You emailed me too” he smiled. “So, you think you might feature me in your new TV series?”

I made a note to my inner math geek self to look up the probability of having the same taxi cab driver twice.

I got out of the taxi and started walking down 5th avenue…and then it hit me. I saw a billboard from the 80s flash before my eyes:

“You’ve come along way baby”

(A Virginia Slims ad campaign)

The message: Jack Alvo was my cab driver that morning not to give me more content for my projects. His purpose that morning was MUCH bigger: to remind me that I’ve come SO far in the past few years–and especially this past year. I was also clear that his message to me was to be shared with all of YOU. So, if you’re feeling self-doubt, fear, shame, or (in my case) pressure to achieve faster, calm down because YOU’VE COME A LONG WAY BABY.

WendyOMG I love this woman!  Our blog today is contributed by the powerful Wendy Timmons.

Wendy is a woman moving MILLIONS–an author, speaker, Broadway and documentary film producer, and success coach on a mission to empower 24 million women. She has built socially impactful businesses for over 17 years and has spent the last 11 years as an entrepreneur.  Wendy’s first book, ‘The Entrepreneur Next Door’ will be released in 2016.

In March 2013, Wendy began renting her apartment on Airbnb hoping that it would provide enough income to allow her to not go back to her job as a senior executive at a digital media company and instead allow her to continue to work on Chix 6 and SuperYou.  Two years and over 100 groups of guests later, Wendy created a six figure plus business from one apartment and a few consulting gigs and has been able to travel the world.

Wendy’s experience on Airbnb led to her becoming passionate about the culture of ‘improvisational living’/everyday entrepreneurs and believes that the world will be a better place if stories of everyday people entrepreneurs uniquely ‘connecting the dots to create their dream life can be told–not to mention the fact that 50% of jobs will be gone in the next twenty years (The Economist Jan 2014). In February 2015, Wendy bought a one way ticket to Sydney and circled the globe for 60 days–interviewing entrepreneurs in every city she stopped in along her journey.

Wendy began her career designing and implementig a series of educational programs and initiatives for the United States Environmental Protection Agency that have been recognized as some of the most far-reaching and impactful education initiatives in EPA History.  Wendy received the gold medal for excellence in environmental education from EPA Administrator Carol Browner and President Bill Clinton for the work she did to create and implement the Earth Day 2000 Art Contest.  Wendy has presented  and been a panelist at over a dozen education conferences and published a series of educational pamphlets about source reductions, re-use, and recycling for the US EPA.   Wendy earned her BS from the University of Michigan in 1998 and her MRLS from the University of Denver College of Law in 2004.

To follow her work and connect with her:

www.supereverafter.com

www.facebook.com/wtimmons1

Instagram: wendytimmonsnyc

Periscope: @superv24

Twitter: @superv24

Light Bulb Moments

It is amazing when those light bulb moments occur. For me today one happened just as I woke and was doing the necessary actions you do in waking in the mornings!

Suddenly quite clearly I heard… ‘It is not about getting rid of the panic attacks and never getting them again, it is about living comfortably with them, to face it and work out the message (if any) and then carry on.’ Accept this is a part of me and let go. For me this was a HUGE thing as I have always come from the space of hating them, wanting to run away from them, ignoring it and hoping that the feelings I get before a panic whammy will go away and not turn into anything more. Has this worked for me? Not really considering it is heading close to the 20 year mark of having them and yes sometimes I deal with them better than other times but it is still a love/hate relationship leaning more towards the hate side of things.

I am getting better in that after that first initial rush of ‘I’m a panic attack sufferer, Get me out of here’ that I then try to stop and reign my inner Jaguar in and try to look at it properly, but those in the know, know that sometimes rational thinking gets thrown to the side and our inner instincts come out and makes it hard to stop the reaction we are so used to performing.

Today though and in these coming days, I am going to make a conscious effort to get to know my panic from a friendly perspective, I am going to realize it is okay if I get them, but then it is up to me on how much I let them control me and what I do about it. As I have definitely let them be the one in charge for a very long time. It is time to test those limits I have placed on myself – of where I can go and what I can do in the fear that it may bring out the beast known as panic. It is time to be gentle with me and my panic and know that it is okay.  It is time to trust in myself, and the universe that I am safe, protected and can trust.

It is time to curl up with my Jaguar and know that yes there is a time for running, there is a time to fight, but most importantly there is a time to curl up together and just enjoy.

This message also can be adapted to so many parts of my life, it doesn’t just have to be for panic attacks – it’s just that that happens to be a big thing for me right now, which I also need to let go of, as I am giving them more power by constantly thinking about it!

What parts of your life or yourself can you become friends with and learn to accept and let go of? There is always going to be something you don’t particularly like and so forth, but that is when it is most important to become friends with it and treat it like you would a child or a best friend… send some loving to those parts of you and watch them change!

Till next time… keep walking your spiritual path xx

JuliaBlog written by the magnificent Julia also known as Yellow Wolf.  Julia keeps her Left and Right hand side of the brain happy by being a successful business woman within the Mortgage Broking Industry and by having started her own Spiritual Practice.

Julia’s passion is to inspire those around her, with her own experiences as well as with daily inspiration and spiritual insight on her Facebook page.

Julia loves assisting clients and sharing her in depth knowledge to empower others.

You can find Julia on Facebook https://web.facebook.com/Yellowwolfenlightenment/

Follow her Blogs here…  https://yellowwolfenlightenment.wordpress.com/

Happily ever after and other lessons I got from watching fairy tales.

I love fairy tales and watching movies with my children.  This evening we watched Cinderella. Not the animated movie but the real life Cinderella.

I know the story well. I read it often as a child and the lessons from this story never fail to inspire me.

In Cinderella’s story her mother dies, changing her life forever.  What she once knew as normal no longer is.

Consider this; What is a normal life?

You may have experienced sadness, grief, trauma or a little bit of lost-ness at some point in time.  You may have stuffed up big time or even forgotten your dreams.

In my own life I have experienced the loss of loves ones, children, broken marriages and even a little of myself. I have had  huge dreams and at times been to afraid to follow them. I have played small, hidden my brilliance for fear of being perceived arrogant. I’ve forgotten dreams or pushed them far inside a drawer never to see the light of day.

There have been times where I have questioned my existence and wondered about life.  At the end of the day no-one can be responsible for my dreams or your dreams, forgotten or hidden.

In the movie Cinderella’s mother leaves her with these words.  “What ever you do and what ever happens to you remember to have courage and be kind” 

These words become her guiding light. Treated badly by her step mother and steps sisters Cinderella continues to be kind. In her quite space (the attic) she remembers her dreams, the promises she made to her self, to her mother and her father and she recalls her past happy memories that provide her with hope for the future.

I’m here to tell you that if you had a time where you’ve been a Cinderella, been treated poorly, lost your hope or your dream, it’s time to rekindle the flame. Come out of hiding, shine your light, put on your glass slippers and follow your dream.

The story that many of you know, ends well. Cinderella’s prince finds her, but before he fits her with the glass slipper she stands before him, not in her beautiful glamorous ball gown but just as she is.

A commoner, a simple girl from the country who loves him,

Real. Authentic. True.

They kiss….. Aaaaaaw and walking from the room Cinderella forgives her wicked step mother.

Yes, she forgives her stepmother. Now that takes courage.

What are you holding onto that needs forgiveness? Give it some thought. Un-forgiveness can keep you from moving forward and stop you from living a life filled with peace.

Shit happens and often we are left worse for the wear. Heart broken, used and abused.  The choice to stay this way or hold on to the past is entirely up to you.

A quote I heard a few years ago and I still remember is this;

Un-forgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the person who did you an injustice to die.

It’s never going to happen… the only person it harms is you.  Take my advice, grab a piece of paper and go and sit somewhere quite. Write down all the people who have wronged you, burn the paper or crinkle it up and throw it away.

Forgive them so you can move on.

Whether you choose to stay bruised, down and out or you continue to buy into the excuses as to why things never work out for you or you decide to tap into your courage, lift your head high and walk down the path with faith and trust that a new day will bring you one step closer to the real you – the amazing, gorgeous, brilliant YOU, created through trial and tribulation… is entirely up to you.

Your story can have a “happily ever after” too.

With a little bit of courage, a dash of kindness, a sprinkle of magic and forgiveness you can let go of the things that no longer serve you to create an ever after that helps you to become the person you were created to be.

Brenda AnnThis week’s blog was written by the amazing Brenda Tsiaousis.  Brenda is a Potentialist, Business Success Mentor and Connector of Dreams. Her mission is to empower women in business globally to realize their full potential as leaders and successful entrepreneurs using a potent combination of business strategy, mindset and incredible faith to quickly facilitate change, find their edge and grow their business. Hang out with Brenda on Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/brendatsiaousis or visit her website; www.brendatsiaousis.com