Just when you think you have nothing left to give.

I’m going to fess up here – doing three hours of yoga a day is seriously challenging me.

As is my normal habit I’ve bitten off way more than I think I can chew and both my body and mind is feeling the increased intensity.

But a promise is a promise.  And ultimately I have made a promise to YOU to up my game, to collapse the timeline of manifesting my certification and doing whatever the hell it takes.

I’m not planning to go back on my word no matter how much my muscles ache or my mind wants to slip away into sweet slumber.

So it was that I found myself in class number three yesterday afternoon.  My body was dripping sweat and stars were periodically flying in front of my eyes.  All I wanted to do the entire time is to collapse into Shavasana (corpse pose) and lie there like the living dead.

I didn’t.

Each time the teacher instructed the next pose I would shake my head, dig a little deeper, take a huge breath and move into the fucking pose.  And held.  And held.  All the time craving Shavasana.

Then an interesting thing happened for me.

Around 45 minutes into the class I told myself to remember why I was here.

I’m not here just to move from one posture to the next dammit.  I’m here to become the best goddamn yoga teacher this side of the equator.  That’s going to take a hell of a lot more than just holding plank.

It’s going to take focus, dedication and mindful practice.

Why do I want to be the best teacher?

Because my tribe needs me to step up and guide them on a whole new and exciting journey where I combine body and mind into a  powerful unit to release long held trauma and bullshit from the body, unleashing the power of the mind so they can have extraordinary results in their lives.

That’s ultimately why I’m standing here in Warrior One with trembling thighs, screaming shoulders and arms, stinging salt sweat dripping into my eye making me blink furiously.

So I hold on to that and I hold mindfully.

As the connection is made my teacher gives the instruction “Okay, lie on your backs, legs apart, arms away from the body and relax in Shavasana”.

Choices.

Always choices.

I get up.

I put my head on the floor and I do headstand for the entire time that the rest of the class sleeps.

Boom!

Next level Baby.

Another glass ceiling shattered.

There is an interesting dance that happens between your thoughts and your muscles.  A dance where one starts humming a melody and the other puts in the words.  If the melody is upbeat and powerful, the words are uplifting and strengthening.  When the melody is soppy and sad, the words will always spiral you down into a pity party of epic proportions.

Here’s the thing though – at any given time YOU can change the tune!

In my head it normally sounds like “Stop your shit Anel.  Harden The Fuck Up.  Remember why you started and go next level.  NOW!”

I’m not saying that your voice has to sound the same Darling, but you have to start becoming aware of that voice and you have to start choosing the words that are floating around you.

The only way to get to this level of mindfulness is to practice it again and again and again.  To find some supportive tools that gets you in the habit of becoming aware and choosing.

Lately I have upped my journaling to between one and three hours a day!!  I’m finding the instant transformation addictive and it’s showing in my actions and my results.

Whenever I find there’s a slump in my energy I simply sit down and start asking myself what’s going on here?  What has shifted out of alignment that has me feeling this way?  That’s because I’ve made the decision that my normal is a pumping, driven, inspired kick-ass high achiever and anything else is a sign that something has gone haywire.

Then I write whatever comes up for me and look at it with intrigue and genuine interest.

Then I get to choose.

I start with “Everything that I write down is true in my physical reality” and I start writing affirmations like there’s no tomorrow.  EVERYTHING that I want to be, do, have, eat, think, say, experience – I write them down as if they already are because I know on an energetic level they are.

Try it.

I’m finding that the shift in energy happens so fast in my body that it literally feels as if someone has switched a heater on in my tummy!  I’ve even started sweating just from journaling in the last few days.

I’m instantly more energized and taking way more action than I thought was possible for me in a day.  My results have sky rocketed.  I no longer feel the desire to ‘relax’ because every time I write down my true life I am shifted into my next level energy and I have access to everything that she does.

And Anel 2.0 does three hours of yoga finishing off with a headstand.

Where are you feeling sluggish in your life or even day?  Have you sat down and investigated what’s really happening for you and what the gift of learning is?  Are you choosing to take control of your thoughts and transform your beliefs?  Are you dancing to the beat of your drum with abandon and joy?

This love letter is for YOU to become aware, to choose empowering tools and to step into your next level self in super fast speed.

Because as always death is inevitable, but thriving is a choice I pray you make.

 

With all my love,

Your stretched out yogi

PS:  Are you in Get Your Shiz Together yet?  I sincerely hope so.  If not you still have time to get in today on the early bird special!  Even though we only officially kick off on July 10th I will be live in the group on the 3rd with some pre-course work to get your juices flowing in the right direction.  This course is designed for born achievers who have lost their way a tad and are feeling less than satisfied with their current results.  If that’s you Darling, if you want way more out of life AND the systems and structures that will support you to have your cake and eat it, check out the details here and get your Shiz together!

 

At which stage does knowledge stop being power?

I adored my grandfather.  I remember him encouraging me to always be open to learning and continue my education for as long as possible.  “Knowledge is power which nobody can ever take away from you Anel” he would say in his gruff voice, the skin by his eyes permanently wrinkled from his contagious laugh and wicked sense of humor.  Darling man.

Then we entered the age of information and I can’t help but see the ensuing chaos and confusion lying in its wake.

I believe knowledge is potential power.  Knowledge in and of itself doesn’t do jack-shit.  It’s only when applied that the knowledge becomes power.

So why in a time when information is so freely available are more people not more powerful?

I’m finding people become paralyzed from information overload.  They’re bombarded with way too much information to possibly absorb especially when they’re not being given the time to process and apply.  What this leads to is more uncertainty so what do  they do?  They try and find more information to alleviate the pain only to feel even worse off than before.

The next trend I’m picking up is that people are not ready for the information they are given.  Remember the ancient saying “when the student is ready the teacher will appear”?  Well nobody gives a shit if the student is ready or not – just teach them more!

But it’s futile.  If your mind, your energy is not ready to receive and process the information you’re simply piling on an already fragile foundation.  One of two things will happen – something will be lost or something will break.

Wonder why so many people are burnt out??  Think about it!  I believe this is exactly why.

My next observation is that people are putting the cart before the horse.  They’re so eager to learn new skills yet they haven’t taken the time to figure out WHAT they need to learn.  They haven’t created the energy of their next level self who will require new skills so instead they waste their time by learning all the wrong things.

I feel like I’m not explaining myself well so let’s take a different angle:  Any learning you do should have purpose.  Just like every goal you set should be aligned with your next level best self and who you ultimately desire to become, ultimately living the life you desire to live.  The fastest way to achieve any goal is to first understand who the person is who achieves the goal.  It’s a simple matter of stepping into that energy.  Of trusting yourself that you already know because ultimately every desire you have is a clue of the life you are destined to live – if you choose to do so.  And if you allow yourself to become that person.

Now the moment you step into the energy of your next level self, you intuitively KNOW what you need to learn, what the missing steps are, what the missing routines are.  How you are not showing up right now and how you would be doing things differently from that space.

It’s seriously powerful stuff.

So instead of just bombarding people with more information, I believe the very first step is to help people connect with their true desires, their next version self, and then ask them what it is that they require to learn to facilitate the process.

Very different approach right?

Now all of a sudden we allow people to step into their true power and adding the essentials instead of just taking on other peoples agendas and what THEY want them to learn and become.

Think about the impact it would have on companies.  No longer will they be spending thousands on ‘one size fits all’ training days but instead provide the correct mentors to employees to become their best version self thereby elevating standards, loyalty and the value add from each and every person.  It sounds like a costly affair but really it’s way more cost effective than the frustrating spray and pray approach.

Entrepreneurs, creatives, housewives would set amazing goals, get to identify their next level best selves and thrive as they eagerly learn the information that is in complete alignment with their desires.  No more frustration, no more overload, no more wasting time.  Super lean, productive, stimulated, on fire!

It’s hard to understand this if you’ve never trusted yourself and the fact that the truth already resides inside of you.  I’m not saying you should never again invest in learning and growth – hell no!  I’m saying first invest in your personal growth so you understand what learning to invest in.

Because until you become the person who understands the information you’re being taught, you will never learn it and you sure as hell will never apply it!

It’s pure insanity if you think about it.

And here’s the other thing:  when you step into the energy of the person who is already applying the learning, connecting the dots become super easy and super fast.

This is how I became an IronMan in a mere four months even though I couldn’t swim.  I simply claimed that energy for myself, stepped into it, and then my mind and my body could make the connection super fast.

So here’s your assignment for today:

Sit your beautiful self down, take out that big journal and ask yourself “Who is my next level self?  What is the goal that she is working towards?  What does her environment look like?  Who does she hang with?  What does her day look like?  What is she doing, what is she saying, what is she reading, what is she learning?”

Then free flow that baby and see what comes out for you.

Now you have to trust that what you are writing is your truth!  Because it is.

Next ask yourself “If I was already that woman, what would I tell my current self to learn next?”

THAT is what you want to invest in.  Because that is what you are ready to not only learn but to internalize, implement and use to your advantage.

I would love to hear what you’re investing in next to thrive so hit me a reply at anel@anelbester.com and share!

Because death is inevitable but thriving is a choice Darling.

With love always,

Anel

PS:  Have you seen the launch of Get Your Shiz Together?  Doors are open and the early bird special is available until the 1st of July.  We officially start on the 10th of July but you can start hanging with some high vibe achievers in your private Facebook group.  Check out the details and come play with me.  Can’t wait to witness your magnificent journey.

The tools doesn’t make the man – but can it hinder him?

Look what I received yesterday!  Aren’t they just gorgeous???

Yeah Baby, a brand new pair of mountain bike shoes.

I suspect my previous ones had probably been my companions in excess of eight years.  And after thousands of kilometers of mud, sweat and puppies they were exhausted.

But you know what – they served me beautifully and I’m a little in love with them.  Tatty and all.

Yet the woman in me couldn’t help but squeel with delight as I unwrapped the package with my brand new babies.  I can’t believe I had the discipline to keep on working instead of jumping  on my bike and hitting the trails.  But wait, for weekend is approaching and I know they will be a joy to wear.

This gave me pause to think of my cycling (and other sports and even work journeys) and an interesting observation came to light.  I’ve always been the type of person who will find something that I want to try – knowing instinctively that it will light me up, be in alignment with my purpose and desires, and take me next level – and then wanting to start with the bare necessities.

My loving husband immediately wants to run out and buy the best equipment money can buy.  But not me.  I don’t ever want to start off with the best of the best.  Instead I invest in a low end product that gets me started.  Then I want to work my sweet ass off, see what I can achieve, reward myself with small upgrades until I feel I can fully commit to the long run, to the more serious players.

At this point I will start investing in the best of the best.  Never before.

Now you might argue with me here and say this is a lack of commitment or a scarcity mentality or whatever.

But I know myself and I also know that in my world of high achievers, working for reward is essential to the joy we receive in succeeding.

And here’s the other thing I’ve noticed.

People who start with the best of the best tend to be a little ‘lazy’.  Thing is you have to work a shit ton harder with the basic equipment.  Now whether that is an entry level bike with no trimmings or starting a company without the fancy website, the paid team of experts, etc.

When you start off with the basics you have to learn a whole new set of skills without the assistance of advanced technology.  And make no mistake, the technology that goes into even the new bikes and running shoes are absolutely astounding!  And YES, they most definitely make a difference to your performance on race day.

I have chosen to model some of the pro athletes who train or play on entry level bikes knowing that it forces their muscles to work harder.  The response is slower so their instincts need to be sharper.  It’s just a completely different workout.  Then when you get back on your machine not only do you appreciate it way more, the thrill of the ride is intensified and all of a sudden you have all the new power from training which makes you fly!

The other observation I’ve made is that people who start off ‘easy’ with the best of the best don’t always stay in the game for the long run.  Equipment can become an ego thing as well as an excuse for not showing up, for not going the distance, for not keeping at it.

Oh I don’t have the right footwear so I can’t go out.  Oh I don’t have the same level of equipment as the others so of course I was going to loose.  I don’t have money for an upgrade now so I’m just going to wait until my ship comes in and then I can go get the new kit and THEN you’ll see how awesome and dedicated I am.

Bullshit.

What will determine your awesomeness is you showing the fuck up every single day.  What will determine your awesomeness is your dedication to yourself and your drive and your passion and your willingness to do whatever it takes from wherever you are and with whatever you have at the time.

THAT is what will ultimately determine your level of success.

Which brings me to my next point that price is not always an indication of what is best for you OR of what is the best.  I know we like to think it is.  Especially with the way that the modern world is driven by clever marketing and the ‘luxury brand image’ that is being held as the one to have.  Be careful that you’re not buying a pretty picture instead of a product or service that is driven by passion and purpose and dedicated masters who invest in always improving their craft instead of building a brand and doing clever marketing.  I’m not saying you don’t have to do the marketing.  If you want to be of service, you need to reach your people.

Having said that there’s nothing wrong with investing in the luxury brands IF they are the best fit for you.  Sometimes what enhances one person actually distracts from another.  A designer suite might make one person feel like a king and another feel like an imposter which only screws them over and has them showing up insecure.

A sad contradiction of intended outcome.

What I’m trying to encourage you to do is to start making your decisions based on what it is that you need right now, what will be best for you in this moment, and what will ultimately take you next level.  Take your ego off the table, stop comparing yourself to others.  Instead go inside and connect with your higher knowing and ask “What is it that I require for my next level thrive?”  And then trust that it will be presented to you.  If you really want me to go completely woo-woo, ask your guides, angels, whoever you believe in, to connect you with the right people and products that will serve your highest good in living your purpose.

Allow the magic to happen.

Sometimes you’ll meet someone and think “No way!  That is just coincidence.  Right?” but you’ll know in your heart that it’s not.

I love asking for help.

I love asking for guidance.

I love asking to be connected with the right people and I always am.

From friends to clients to mentors and coaches.

It’s simply magical.

Today I want you to look at your current goals that you’re working towards and start identifying who or what you need to take it next level.  Is it an assistant, a coach, a new pair of shoes (don’t underestimate the power of the shoes Darling)?

Wait!

This time around I don’t want you to drop everything and run out and buy the most expensive you can afford on your remaining credit.

Instead I want you to write to your spiritual helpers asking them to show you, connect you, with the right people or products that will greatly serve you at this point of your journey.  And then open your eyes and SEE!

Now here’s the other thing you will notice, when you get shown who or what, the means are there as well.  You will never be shown something and then get told “Oops sorry, you don’t have enough money for this.  Maybe next time.”  Doesn’t work that way.  If you’re looking at your bank account and not seeing the funds, then ask for assistance with that as well.  It might not happen the way you expect it to.  Instead you might have the inspiration to sell something.  You might receive an unexpected gift.  You might receive a discount or see a sale and viola!

Magical!

Then take action immediately.

Hesitation leads to devastation which I see all the time as well.

Ultimately this is the only truth:  You can BE, DO or HAVE anything that you desire.  It all starts within.  For it’s never a lack of resources which leads to defeat – only a lack of resourcefulness.

Unlock your power from within and then use the resources from outside to enhance.  Not the other way around.

Show me your amazing Darling.

For death is inevitable.  But thriving is a choice you can make right in this moment.

With love always,

Anel

PS:  One of the most popular patterns of self-sabotage is the whole “I can’t afford it” excuse which keeps people from allowing themselves to receive the support they require to go next level.  Sometimes you feel like you just need one fucking break so you can get your shit together and really break free from the pattern of mediocrity that is playing out in your daily life.  Excuses Be Gone!  Get Your Shiz Together is my most affordable program ever and it is going to kick your ass straight back to phenomenal.  This course is not a magic pill Darling.  Don’t think that you can invest in this and then sit back and watch everything change – I don’t roll that way.  What it will do is break down the entire process for you so you can get your foundation rock solid to rock it out!  And best of all – you get to do it in a private group with other achievers on a similar vibe and journey!  Because just as misery loves company, so does awesomeness.  Early bird special on until the 1st of July.  We kick off 10 July 2017 and I simply can’t wait to see you get your shine back.  Get all the deets here.  Let’s play.

Don’t EVER let them tell you what you’re capable of! EVER.

I find it amusing how nobody ever tells me to aim higher, stretch further, set the goal post on the other side of the world so I can grow more simply to get to the finish line.

Yet the moment I take my head out of my ass and decide to up my game to what I know is more in alignment with my true vibration everyone feels the need to tell me to slow down.  Do less.  Take it easier.

Oh FFS.

I’ve made the decision to collapse the timeline for my yoga certification even further thereby doing up to three classes a day.

I’ve been feeling under-challenged lately.

If I have to be completely honest with myself I’ve been feeling slightly bored.

I’ve been feeling no pain of exhaustion and pushing the limits again and again.  You know I love the pain.

I’ve been feeling OMG can  I really say it?  Average!  Bleugh!

I can feel my IronMan strength and fitness, both physically and mentally, die away.  That’s what happens.  It’s called muscle atrophy – what we don’t use, we lose.

So I went onto the available class schedule and identified how many classes I can do whilst continuing to transform and grow my business and add even more value to my tribe.  It’s going to be a tight balance upping my productivity, fueling my body cleverly and taking on the additional workload.

In other words Darling,

IT’S GOING TO FUCKING ROCK!

I’m going to be exhausted.

It’s gonna hurt like hell.

Play mode back ON!

Almost instantly I was advised to back down.  To slow down.  To take fewer classes and maybe one in the morning and one at night.

Not this time Hunny Bear.

I will never again take advise from those who have acclimatized to working with average performers.

Because I know myself in a way that they never will.

They will never know what I am capable of.

They will never hear the voice of purpose-driven passion in my head.

What I’ve learned by now is the more you do, the more you want to do, the more energy you have, the more you can do.  In the same instance the less you do, the less you want to do, the less energy you have, the less you can do.

See the pattern?

We can almost feel sorry for those who exist from day to day, going through the motions.  They look at us and get worried that we’re doing too much.  That we’re going to burn out.  Because they’re operating at 10% of what we do and they’re fucking tired all the time.

They don’t understand that we are a different breed, you and I.  They never will.

For we are the beasts who thrive on pressure.  The stress that kills others is like high octane fuel to our machines.  The goals that scare the pants off others makes us tingle with excitement.

I know because I was awake at 1 am thinking how else I can fit more in.

Not from an energy of panic or overwhelm.

It was from an energy of hunger!  An energy of ambition.  An energy of passion and my Soul knowing that I can sleep plenty when I’m dead.

Right now I don’t want to fucking sleep!

Right now I want to take this middle-aged body and get her lean, mean, sexy machine shape.  Because that’s what I need from her for my next goals.

So I use the ‘concerned advise’ to get me pissed.

Anger is a secret power that the ordinary shy away from.

Anger has taken me places in the past that I’ve loved.

Places that I would have missed out on if I hadn’t tapped into the explosive energy that is available in anger.

I realized this at my very first mountain bike race.  I’d just started cycling with my husband and we decided that we would go race together for fun.  Days before the race he received a request for a meeting a few hours prior to our race and of course he said yes.  “Don’t worry Anel.  I’ll be done in plenty of time for us to get to the race.”

Famous last words.

A couple of hours before the start I receive the message to go so long and he’ll meet me at there.

I could feel my irritation rise.

Standing at the start I was anxiously looking around for him.  I kept sending messages with no response.

The gun shot off and so did the riders.

I was fuming!

I couldn’t believe that he would let me down like this.

To make matters even worse, we hit a cattle crossing around 2 kilometers into the race and I had no choice but to stop and helplessly watch the riders pull away in front of me whilst the cows took their sweet time getting from one field to the next.

By the time that last cow moved her ass out of the way I was piping hot with fury!  I took every last bit of that energy into my legs and I pumped those little babies like Ferrari pistons.  In no time I started pulling in riders.   I held on to my fury.  My husband was in big shit!  Just wait until I got to the finish line.  He better not be there because I was going to fucking kill him.  He better be there or I was going to fucking kill him.

I was so angry I completely lost sight of what was happening around me.

So imagine my surprise when I came around the last corner to hear the announcement “And here is our first lady for the day”.

WTF?!

And people wonder why I’m so hooked on my cycling 🙂

I came skidding over the line and as I pulled the brakes my anger simply evaporated as it was replaced with pure elation.

Hubby never got the dressing down.  I was way too thrilled with my first ever win.

And that’s exactly what I’m going to do this time around.

I’m going to get really pissed about the fact that I was told to slow down and I’m going to use every last drop of that to fuel my determination.

Wanna see me rock this out?

Keep your eyes open Darling because it’s going to be epic.

Yes, I’m going to have bags under my eyes and my normal attire will be replaced with sweaty yoga outfits for the next few weeks.  But know this – I’m going to be in my place of pure JOY!

How about you?

Are you feeling less than exhilarated at the moment?  Because that’s a huge clue for you Darling – it’s time to bite off more than you can chew.

It’s time for you to get pissed at all the well-intentioned little people who convinced you to be reasonable.

Fuck reasonable.

Fuck ordinary.

You Were Born for Extraordinary!

Just embrace it because it’s true.

Sit your sexy ass down right here right now.  Take out your journal and write down this question:  “If I stopped believing in limitations, If I stopped listening to others, If I was my most powerful self, what goal would I be working towards right now?”

Close your eyes.

Take a deep breath.

Then start writing without sensoring yourself.  Just let it come out.  Don’t stop writing until you know for sure you’re done.

Then have a read over what you just wrote.

Does  THAT set you on fire?

Does it make you tingle with excitement?

Do you feel a smile plastered on your face?

Now commit to it.

Right here right now!

Don’t you dare fucking back down.

Because right there is your truth.

Don’t you dare walk away from it.

Whatever your Soul has just shown you, you are capable of. Do you understand that?  Your Soul will NEVER set you up for failure.  Believe this and trust.

Then take just one teeny tiny action towards that goal.  If that is to enter a race, then do it.  Go on the website and just enter, we can figure out the how later.  If that is to open a separate bank account to save up for your dream vacation then do it right now.  If it is to register a website domain for your new business which you didn’t even know you were going to start, then do it!

One step is all it takes to get started on the journey.

And you’re so worth it.

Because whilst you’re listening to the little people your final breath is fast approaching.  Is it going to be a slow sleepy yawn or are you going to blow it out in a steamy exclamation?

Your choice.

With love always,

Anel

PS:  Fuck me Georgie it’s long overdue but I am opening the doors to Get Your Shiz Together today!!  Four weeks to you dropping all your bullshit excuses and coming to play on my field with some epic achievers who. like you, are ready for more.  No more procrastination.  No more thinking you can’t have it all.  Because I know that you fucking CAN!  All it takes is some serious kick-ass planning, structures and clarity.  And I’m going to give it all to you in a training program the likes of which has never been seen before.

Early Bird price only $199 until the 1st of July.  Get all the deets here.

 

 

 

 

What’s the worst thing that could happen?

So often I look at people and wonder when the hell they stopped thinking for themselves?

When did humanity in general get so damned lazy to work their minds?

Oh not YOU of course!  You’re special.  After all you’re in my space and we both know that already makes you a born leader and creator.

One of the reasons I left corporate very early on was I would sit in meetings and listen to people wanting to be told exactly what to do.  Instead of looking at the vision and figuring out how they can add tremendous value they just wanted to be spoon fed and know the necessary steps to take to meet the minimum criteria.

What a waste of personal power, creativity, passion, pride, contribution.

Sad.

Now I find myself observing the masses and thinking that some of these humanoids seriously need to have a boost of Vitamin C-For-Yourself just to function on a minimum level of potential within their DNA.  It would be bad enough if people were actually asking intelligent questions to people who knew what they were talking about.  Instead majority of society is driven by subconscious messaging done by clever advertisers.

They eat the ‘food’ because the skinny models look so happy when they lick the grease off their fingers and jump into the ocean from the million dollar yacht.

They say healthy food doesn’t taste good because their taste-buds have become addicted to the chemicals in the processed food because manufacturers WANT them to eat more – like cattle being force fed as they wait to be slaughtered.

They say they are too tired to cook and prepare decent meals which is why they have to rely on take-aways not getting the correlation – you’re fucking exhausted because your putting mud into your machine instead of fuel!

Grrrr I get so mad.

Then they drink the diet pills because the even skinnier models pop those babies like smarties and wash it down with a soda telling the hypnotized masses that this is the answer to their prayers.

To take it a step further, these ads are delivered to the sheeple who mindlessly sit and channel hop because they’re too tired to actually read a book.

And people believe this shit?

Oh I’m on a roll today.

Wait, let me just get out my higher soap box.

I’m sorry you have to sit through this but seriously people – what the fuck?

So we don’t train our minds to become strong and think for ourselves.  We poison our bodies, work like mindless minions (I’m sorry Minions I love you), drink and smoke excessively and then wake up in the mornings and state “Oh I don’t want to get up.  I’m still so tired.  I just want to sleep an hour longer”.

On the other side we overthink bullshit which stops us from taking action.

We say that we first have to figure out the block and then once we know what it is we’ll take action.  We first need to go journal on the origin of this fear and then once we’ve received the insight we’ll have the courage to move forward.

Oh for Pete’s sake.

Just take the fucking action!

What’s the absolute worst thing that could happen?

You could take the action and fail.  Big hairy deal.  If the action leads to failure you know of at least one more way that it’s not going to succeed.

And of course you’re scared of taking the life-changing actions.  Because that’s where you will finally grow.  Who gives a shit where the fear comes from??  If it’s crucial for your soul purpose I promise you that the insight will come and you’ll be like “Oh wow I was only two at the time.  I’m not two anymore.  Duh.”

Know what I’ve learned on my bike?  When I see something scary coming up and I pull those brakes chances are 100% that I will either end up pushing my bike and feel like a complete whimp OR I will sit there for five minutes and give myself a stern talking to.  Then have to push my bike twenty meters back and just go for it.  And every time I get through the obstacle I think “Oh FFS what was the big deal Anel?”  Because it’s never as bad as I thought it would be.  But now I’ve lost time and valuable energy because I had to spend so much just thinking through the process.  Plus if it was a race I would have lost.

This is another reason why I adore racing.  You grow a seriously big pair of balls from all the adrenaline that’s pumping through your body.  There’s no time to think, you just have to be present, see the best route and commit!  You simply go for it and sometimes you see your ass and come down in a spectacular crash, but hardly ever.  And know what’s best of all?  Even if you come crashing down that same adrenaline gives you super human strength and you just keep going.  The only time I’ve ever not completed a race because of a crash I came off at 70 kilometers an hour and my bike was in pieces.  The ambulance delivered me to my husband and I sulked all the way home because they couldn’t put my bike back together for me to finish.  The fact that I had a haematoma the size of a football on my thigh was besides the point.

My belief is that when you’re so passionate about your goals, you take the action REGARDLESS of the fear.  And then even if it all goes for a ball of donkey pooh your adrenaline and momentum will simply keep you going.

But when you sit there and you keep telling yourself that you have to figure out what the block is, what are you focusing on?  The block!  And what we focus on grows.

Yes I love journaling.  I believe it’s a super duper powerful tool which I use daily.  But I take actions WHILST figuring out the stuff, if I really feel I have to.

Honestly, shit happened in everyone’s lives.

Nobody had a perfect childhood with no scars to show.

I feel that if this is where your constant focus is it’s because your goal isn’t juicy enough.  Because when it is, when it has you salivating just to think about it, you’re not going to take your eye off the ball.

My questions for you today is the following:

  1.  Where have you stopped thinking for yourself?  Where are you taking mindless action even when you know deep inside that it’s bad for you?  And what are you going to do about it?
  2. Where are you NOT taking action because of fear or ‘blocks’ or any stories that you’re telling yourself about what needs to happen before you will take the action?
  3. What is all this costing you?  Get real and nasty here.  Don’t hold the punches.  Because it’s only when we go full out, when we tear up, that we actually start making different choices.

And YOU’re worth smart choices Darling.  The choices that will honor the true warrior, rebel, world leader, creator of epic, that I know you to be.

Please please please don’t fall into the trap of playing it safe.

Ultimately you’re going to die.

Now you can choose to arrive at heaven’s door with a pretty white size 60 dress with your lilly white hands and pretty nails OR you can skid in sideways covered with mud, bruises, streaks of adventures all over your laughing face shouting “Fuck Yeah – let’s do it again!”

Only you can choose.

Because death IS inevitable.  But thriving is a choice which doesn’t happen without action.

With love,

Anel

PS:  If you’re done procrastinating and waiting for the seven thousands stars to align with the moon whilst mercury is not in retrograde and you want a good kick up the ass to get you moving then you want to seriously consider Kick-Start NOW.  What do you say Darling?  Are you ready to rage your victory to your epic?  I’m here waiting to support you.  But you need to take the first step.  Check out the details here.

 

Happiness is… bruised knees and yoga mat burns

I love pain.

I’m serious – I think I might be addicted to the shit!

Somehow until this morning I’d just never connected the dots.

For one thing there’s no way in hell that you can be a dancer and not have pain.  Which means my addiction probably started around age six.

As an adult doing kick-boxing, bleeding knuckles and screaming muscles quickly became mundane.  I had to go play with the boys in full contact and come home with swollen cut lips and slightly bruised chins to get my fix.

Then I found cycling.  I fondly hold on to memories of epic falls, bruises, blood, cracked helmets.  At one stage my husband refused to go shopping with me because he was tired of getting strange looks from people when I tried to assure them that my bruised face was from falling off my bike.  I finished Action Man with a bee stinger in my face because I refused to slow down in transition so the medics could attend to me.  I figured as long as the swelling wasn’t so bad that I couldn’t see, I could still finish the race.

Doing IronMan three times with a bone ripping up the inside of my hip, a lower back with disintegrating vertebrae, and some other interesting bodily happenings took the challenge to another level.

Which leads me to my current journey of becoming a Yoga instructor.  There’s the mediocre pain from the old bone in the hip which is still causing me a fair amount of discomfort, but I’m not walking out of the sessions feeling like a washed out rag, lying on the grass holding back the vomit (oh those were the days my friend).

Until this morning that is.  Today is National Yoga Day.  I personally think today was a special gift from my angels for my patience and dedication to come to class after class and not getting my fix yet not giving up.  Today my teacher gave me 2 and a half hours of exquisite pain.

The first hour was spent in the normal class format but once everybody else left I was given the opportunity to do 108 uninterrupted sun salutations.

Oh the joy!!!

The first thirty wasn’t too bad.  Then it started happening.  My arms started aching.  My legs started feeling the strain.  My knees started to feel a tad bruised.

I was in heaven.

I kept going.

She asked if I wanted to stop – OH HELL NO!!!!  This was the most fun I’ve had in four months!

It took me ninety minutes to get through all 108 and I knew from the word go that I was going to succeed.  I embraced the sweet love of the pain.  My mind went still and I felt every delicate whispered kiss that hurt so beautifully.  I was switched on, tuned in, on fire.

Finally my hands went back into prayer position, I bowed down to the Big U and all of creation and then collapsed onto the floor.

I felt so alive!

Dead from exhaustion but alive.

It gave me pause to think what this crazy addiction to pain is really all about?

I’ve come to the conclusion that life will always include pain.  Our choice as human beings is how we’re going to approach it and respond to it.

Some of my most severe pain was in my early thirties when I took on the label of depression.  Shit it hurt like a mofo!  I’m not sure what was worse for me – the actual feeling of depression or the shame of being a woman with a successful life who simply felt no joy.  What the fuck was wrong with me?

I felt weak.

I felt like a failure.

I felt like every person who ever told me I would amount to nothing had won.

Before this point I had never admitted to my weakness and never asked for help.

And when I finally started reaching out to people they just didn’t get it.  Chin up Anel.  It will pass Anel.  It’s just a phase Anel.

It was like I had become invisible.  Like they couldn’t see the fucking pain.

So I shut down with medication.  Except the pain of feeling nothing at all was even more excruciating.  What was the point of existing?  What was the point of not thriving?

I went to therapy and the pain of reliving every shitty incident and relationship in my childhood just made no sense to me whatsoever.  I wanted to punch the stupid bitch after every session when she told me to go home and be gentle with myself.

I hated feeling weak.

Yes I said hated!

I fucking hated feeling weak because that’s not who I am.  It’s not my truth and every time that we live out of alignment to our truth our soul rages in fury and that fury splits you right down the middle.

So my soul decided to take matters in hand and showed me the kickboxing Dojo – thank you Ing (that’s my higher self in case you’re wondering).  She showed me that in order for me to feel fully alive, to be fully alive, all I needed to do was stay connected to my body.  When I can feel my body, all the pain, the exhaustion, the blood, I know I’m choosing my brand of pain, I’m in control of my life.

Because that’s what depression does – it takes you out of the driver’s seat.  You become a strapped passenger watching life pass you by.  You become the victim of a black satire.

Fuck that shit.

I’m a warrior!

I’m the creator of my life!

I’m the only driver in this Mercedes Benz.

You’re probably thinking I’m a little loopy at this stage.

Or maybe you get it.

Maybe you get the fact that for some of us there is a power in the decision to embrace pain.  Because let’s be honest Darling, no life is free from pain.  Why wouldn’t I then choose to make it my bitch?  Why wouldn’t I use my body to test my mind again and again, each time making her stronger and more indestructible?  Once your mind is at that point other pain in life becomes relatively easy.

Feeling the pain of a failing bank balance?  The victim sits and cries going further down the red line.  The warrior sits down, figures out a plan and takes action to turn it around.

Feeling the pain of a relationship falling apart?  The victim sits and cries, blaming the other person for everything thereby bringing the same shit to the next relationship.  The warrior sits down, looks inside, takes full responsibility for their role in the breakdown and heals that shit before even considering another relationship.

But none of this is possible if you hide away from pain.  Because ultimately like any other muscle, indestructability has to be trained again and again and again.

When my physical activity is void of any pain I can feel the emotional pain rising up because my mind starts getting weak and tiny mole-heaps become these ginormous mountains.

Here’s my invitation to you today – have a look at your physical activity and start identifying where you’re allowing yourself to hurt with the specific intention of working on your mindset.  Because here’s the other thing, if you just hurt for the sake of hurting and you’re not using this gorgeous tool to get stronger, well that’s a bit pointless isn’t it?  OMG and before you take this completely out of context, I’m not talking about cutting yourself or any shit like that!  I’m talking about doing sport as part of a mind-set strategy.  Then again if you were thinking that you should probably stop reading my work right now!

But wait, I wander off topic.  Once you’ve identified your sport of choice, start noticing where you actually do push into the pain barrier and what’s happening in your head.  Or are you stopping when there’s just a hint of what’s to come.  Because if you are chances are great that you’re playing small in other areas of life every time there is a possibility of getting hurt.

No pain no gain.

What do you need to tell yourself to push a little further?  What is the goal you need to set that makes the pain worthwhile?  What is the big why that will get you to HTFU?

This is part of the missing foundation for most people who don’t achieve their goals.  They never even look at the pain side.  Ultimately you want to set a goal and face all the possible pain because the pain of NOT achieving the goal should be far greater than the pain you will encounter on the journey.  And make no mistake Darling, there WILL be pain.  The ultimate purpose of any goal is for you to grow as a person and it’s called growing pains for a reason.

Now look at your existing goals and ask yourself, are you even working on the right goals?  Does the pain of NOT achieving it drive you enough to keep pushing on even when your body feels broken and bruised?  Because if the answer is no then put that baby away and dig deeper.

Life is way too short to work towards mediocre goals that you’re not prepared to hurt for.

And the greatest pain of all is mere existence.

After all death is inevitable.  Thriving is a choice worth bleeding for.

With love always,

Anel

PS:  Are you sitting there with a sensation of nervous excitement because every time you read my ramblings there is a spark inside of you, a whisper of desire?  Then now’s the time to light that baby up and start taking it next level.  How much longer are you going to wait Darling because trust me when I say that just sitting there with a smile tugging at your cheeks is not going to change anything in your life.  You have to take action.  You have one more week to sign up for Kick-Start and take your life next level in thirty days.  Hit reply right now and I’ll send you all the information you need to get your ass moving in the right direction.  You know you want to.  Just get out of your own way.

The voice of reasoning that is nothing but a blatant lie.

Have you met Freddy?

Maybe you don’t recognize Freddy by that name.  Maybe you call him by another.

Freddy is that scared little ego who lives inside your head.  A cave creature who believes in dinosaurs, scarcity of resources, that your tribe is going to stone you to death if you speak your truth which always seems to ruffle some feathers.

The thing is, he sounds way bigger and more impressive because of the loud echo created within the emptiness of the cave.

Freddy keeps you in your well appointed place.

In the corner.

Squat smaller.

Speak softer.

Don’t rouse their attention.

Freddy will show you all the reasons why you shouldn’t do the epic shit that lights you up with so much excitement that you can’t sit still!  You know the stuff I’m talking about right?  I can see you connecting with them as you read this.  I can see you smile.

THAT stuff.

The dreams that were mere seedlings when you were young, running around with a towel tied around your neck depicting your super hero status, just in case passerby’s couldn’t see how broad and strong your chest was.  The dreams you had about greatness, unlimited resources, amazing success, adventure, excitement, impact.  Standing on the apple cart box turned upside down preaching to your dolls because you had something important to say and there was somebody who needed to listen.

The dreams you had before the other kids started teasing you for walking funny, talking weird stuff, being an outsider.  The dreams you had before you grew up and had responsibilities. Bills to pay.  Kids to raise.  Spouse to please.

Remember those Hunny?

Except no matter how hard you try to suppress and deny those dreams, they’re still there waiting for you at night.  They are the things you see when you close your eyes and go to the place you were born to be.  The things you see others have and feel a burning jealousy creeping up in your throat.  Except it hurts like a mofo to see it’s in fact all possible so you find a reason to judge them, criticize them, make them wrong.

You read right – jealousy and criticism is potential un-lived inside your soul.

Ouch.

Sorry Love.  But it’s true.

I would know.

I’ve made love with the green-eyed monster and slept exhausted in her arms on more than one occasion until I finally understood this.  Now instead of feeding her cabbage I thank her and feed her dark chocolate and red wine.  Acknowledging my true desires and turning them into challenging goals.

This is where Freddy takes center stage.

OMG his voice is deafening!

Telling me all the reasons why I’m going to fail.

I’m not clever enough.

I don’t know enough.

I’m not good enough.

Who do I really think I am?

I’m not meant for this – I’m just an average girl born into a middle class life which is where I should remain and be grateful.

I’m going to piss people off.

I’m going to lose everyone and end up a miserable, fat, lonely old crone.

I don’t have the money to invest.

I don’t have the determination and the discipline.

Nobody gives a shit about what I think or what I have to say.

They will judge me for swearing.

It goes on and on and on.

Unless I write that goal down and take action before Freddy get’s past “Whaaaaaaat….”  I’ve raised my well manicured middle finger and declared “speak to the finger because the ears ain’t home”.

Because if you give Freddy two chances he will change your mind Darling.  He will make you hesitate just long enough for his poison to take hold in your heart and your courage will falter.

Here’s the thing though, Freddy ain’t never going away.  He’s going to be with you until the day you die.

But there are things you can put in place that will ensure you take action and live your dreams despite his insistent whining in your ears.

Here’s my top strategies for shutting Freddy the fuck up:

  1. I always have a Dream Team – oh hell yeah I have to strength of Super Woman but even she fought better with a team around her.  I make damn sure I have my BFF’s, my MasterMind group, my personal coach.  Always.
  2. I write my goals down every day – I believe that when we go to sleep at night the Universe goes Alt Ctrl Del which means every morning is a brand new start.  Clean page.  Recommit.
  3. I have a huge reason for every goal – I’ve learned a long time ago that setting frivolous goals is just a way of keeping super busy and distracted from the epic stuff.  If I can’t come up with at least ten reasons why a goal is a must-achieve for me, I don’t even bother.
  4. I do my mind-set work seven days a week – you know the old story about the two wolves inside right?  The good and the evil which resides inside all of us and what determines which one wins is the one we feed today.  Well Freddy and my Ing is the same.  I choose to feed my Ing.

And if all else fails I ride my bikes!  I’m so not even joking.  If The Cookie Monster or Artemis could talk they would tell you tales of us being chased by demons and how loud we shout to drown out the fear-spewing bullshit that at times threatens to overwhelm me.  When I’m on one of my bikes, something bigger than me takes over.  I feel a sense of invincibility.  A sense of calm.  A knowing.  All the answers come to me.

You might call it meditation.

I call it …

Actually it’s too perfect for the English language.  Sorry, you will have to experience it for yourself.

So my Darling, what do you have in place to block out the voice of Freddy when you set those HUGELY exciting goals?

Here’s your mission (should you be courageous enough to accept it):

Sit your sweet ass down and write down your BIGGEST POSSIBLE dream.  The one that you’ve secretly kept to yourself because you didn’t want people to lock you up for being a lunatic.

Ask yourself why have you not achieved this goal yet and let it all come out.  All of it.  Don’t sensor this.  Give Freddy free reign and let him go ape shit.

Then sit with each ‘reason’ and ask ‘is this really true?‘  REALLY true – investigate each and every statement.  Here’s the thing though, you need to start recognizing the difference between chocolate and manure.  Here’s some of the most popular BS I hear:

  • I don’t have the time
  • I don’t have the money right now
  • My kids are too young
  • My spouse wouldn’t feel comfortable with me doing this
  • I’m too young
  • I’m too old
  • I’m too unfit
  • I’m too skinny
  • I’m too fat

All of this boils down to one thing:  “I’m too comfortable and too chicken shit to go for it”.

Understand this – THERE IS NOTHING THAT YOU CAN’T BE, DO OR HAVE!

Let me say it again – There.  Is.  Nothing.  That.  You.  Can’t.  Be.  Do.  Or.  Have.

Get it?

But it always takes some brass balls, some commitment, some support and a willingness to get uncomfortable and at times downright scared.

How much do you want it?

Because where there is a will there is ALWAYS a way.  No matter who you are or what your current circumstances are.

Write that dream down and turn it into a goal by putting a deadline on her.  Feed your Ing rather than Freddy and surprise the hell out of yourself.

Look in the mirror and give a loud Hoorah!

Because you’re invincible.

You’re kick ass.

You’re fucking magnificence in human form – and that’s a beautiful thing to witness Darling.

Because death is inevitable, but thriving is a choice.

With all my love,

Anel

PS:  The one thing every one of my clients say is that they constantly hear my voice in their heads (LOL, shame).  And my voice is always louder than their fear.  That’s because truth and fear is unable to co-exist.  And I give the truth.  If you’re done listening to Freddy whining and moaning and scaring the living shit out of your dreams then now is the time we connect.  I’m in the process of changing my entire business model, but until the end of June you can sign up to work privately with me for 30 days and absolutely crush it!  If you’re a born achiever currently frustrated by average results in your life, then PM me immediately and I’ll send you all the details of Kick-Start.  You have a choice to make right in this moment – are you going to commit and take immediate action, or are you going to wait for Freddy to do another number on you?  It all comes down to choices.

No more Mrs Nice Guy.

I wish I could make you feel better by saying that there was a time when I was really a nice girl.

Truth be told I was probably just born a little rebel who didn’t conform and so was labelled a bitch as far back as I can remember.  The times that I was ‘well behaved’ or did what was considered ‘nice’ was just me playing the game for some reason or another.  Whether that was to stay out of trouble (ha ha, I was in shit a lot) or wanting to get my way.

I’m everything your mother didn’t want you to be.

I’m selfish.

I’m ambitious.

I’m strong willed and don’t bow down to ‘authority’ when I think they’re being full of shit.

I would rather be working on my business which is my way of living my purpose than working on temporary relationships.

I would rather be at home on a Friday night resting for the long ride tomorrow than out partying.

I feel empathy for people but I’m yet to find a sympathetic bone in my body.

This has been me as far back as I can remember.

I started dancing at the age of six and the moment I put on that first pair of ballet slippers, I didn’t want to waste time playing with the other little girls.  I wanted to train.

I was the weird girl who could somehow hang with the cool kids even though I didn’t do any sports or go to any parties.  Maybe they thought it was cool to be seen with the weird kid.

 

Every time people tell me that I’m not a nice person and I ask them why, it tends to be because I didn’t drop everything that I’m busy with, everything that’s important to me, and paid attention to them.  Or I didn’t say the thing they wanted me to say to validate them or make them feel good in some way.

It’s because I didn’t want to let them in for coffee when they were bored and lonely and instead I selfishly wanted to do additional preparation for a client or create something new for my soul tribe.  It’s because I didn’t blow smoke up their sensitive bums instead of speaking my truth.

To make things even more complex for me, I simply don’t fucking get it!  I really don’t.  I never just drop in for coffee – not even when I lived next to my mom.  I would phone first and find out if she’s got time or if she’s busy.  I never invite people to go out when I know they’re deep into achieving their next level goal.  I get really irritated with people for pulling the punches and not telling me their truth – do they really think I can’t handle it?

Fuck that shit Baby.  I’m an IronMan.  I’m a SkyRunner.  I’ve been to the dark side and I came back through boxing a bag.  I can handle it.  Yes, it will sting and my eyes may water from the pain.  Hell I might even cry.  But ultimately no matter what truth you give me, I will always go inside and ask myself “is this really true for me?”  And if it is, I will give myself a good kick up the ass and take action around it.  And if not, I will let it go.

I personally think nothing could be nicer than if people stopped lying.  Nothing could be nicer than if people stopped wasting their own time and the time of others and actually started getting on fire with the passion of their purpose.  I think it would be awesome if people would start sorting out their shit by doing the work necessary to effect change instead of spreading their misery and drama around to every Tom, Dick and Annabella.

So this begs the question, am I really not a nice person OR am I the nicest person you will ever get to meet when I close the door in your face because you dropped by unannounced with your baby in a buggy and your dog on a leash – just because you didn’t have anything better to do.  Maybe me not letting you in (as was clearly unexpected) was the wake-up call you needed to ask yourself why you’re feeling bored.

Damn I can’t remember EVER feeling bored.

How the hell do people have time to be bored?

Oh wait I lie – actually every social I dragged myself to for the sake of keeping the peace and then having to listen to a bunch of drunk people telling me how fucked up their relationships, their money, their jobs, their lives are and that drinking is the only way they can find happiness.  That’s boring as hell.

Needless to say that my conversations don’t last long at these events.  It kinda goes like this:

Other person – “Oh woe is me”

Me – “If you don’t like your life maybe it’s time to look at the choices you’re making.  Ultimately you are the creator of everything around you.  You don’t like what you see?  Pull your finger out your sweet ass and start doing something about it.”

Other person – “Oh”.

End of conversation.  They walk to the next person who gives them a sympathetic ear and they both end up drowning themselves.  One for their sorrows.  The other because they’re bored silly by the drama but too nice a person to walk away.

I’m sorry but I have way too much love and respect for humanity to be false just so you will like me.  Love me or hate me.  With me you will always know what you get and what I do and say is from a place of deep love.

Does this mean I get called bitch a lot?  Oh yes.  But I chose to re-frame it as a compliment because it means I don’t kiss ass Darling.

Are you pretending to be a nice person as defined by the masses for not other reason other than to be liked?

Maybe you’re just genuinely a caring and loving person and your purpose is to always be available to others.  Then go for it!

But if you’re not, if being nice is just a way to stay distracted from your true ambitions and purpose, if it’s a way of playing small, then now is the time to stop being nice and start being impactful.

This truly is the greatest gift you can give to people.

Your people.

Because if they are your people, chances are they’re not very ‘nice’ either.

Personally I much prefer to hang with my bitchy besties on appointment than killing time with strangers.

Because ultimately you’re going to die anyway.  And all those people who came for coffee because they were bored, they will go on existing none the wiser.

But if you want to thrive, you have to choose to honor your truth and your personal brand of ‘nice’.

With love,

Anel

PS:  I’m in the process of changing my entire business model which will be launched shortly.  This new model will make working with me privately a rare experience, never mind 30 days at the incredibly low investment of $450!  If you know in your heart of hearts that I’m the coach who is going to whip your ass and your life into shape through my unwavering belief in you, my blunt honesty and my action-orientated approach, then you want to check out Kick-Start today.  If you need a few weeks to build up the courage to get started that’s cool, but you only have until the 30th to grab it at $450.  Check out the details here and let’s play Darling.

PPS:  Wanna hang with some rebels who are here to make a difference without all the rules?  Then come join us on Facebook at Business Rebels.

 

 

The hardest part is NOT getting started.

I sometimes wonder if I’m the only one who never stops questioning?

 

It’s like this relentless infantile voice in my head but instead of asking the annoying “why” that every two year old gets stuck on at some stage, my voice asks “is that really true?”

The really interesting part is not that I’m always asking the question.  What fascinates me is that the answer is rarely yes for me.

Such as the saying that ‘the hardest part is getting started’.

Looking back on my life and the interactions I’ve had with my clients, the hardest part of any journey is NOT getting started.

The hardest part is the commitment to the outcome prior to having a clue on even how to even get started.

I’m talking high level commitment.

No matter what.

Regardless of current circumstances.

Doesn’t matter how far behind I’m starting from everyone else.

I don’t give a shit what everyone else says is possible or not.

I expect and embrace the judgement as part of my growth.

Non-negotiable.

I’m willing to leave some people behind.

I know it’s gonna hurt like hell.

Yes I might look like a fool some days and be ridiculed by those who don’t understand.

THAT level of commitment.

I don’t even think most people register the level of commitment I’m talking about here.

Let’s be honest, there’s very few things that you’re still expected to commit to these days.

Don’t like your boss?  Quite your job and find another one.

Don’t like how hard it is to build a business?  Quite and go find a job again.

Not happy with the fact that your partner didn’t turn out to be perfect for you after all?  Get a divorce because there’s millions of fish in the sea.

Too hard to say no to the tub of ice-cream even though you said you’re committed to losing weight?  That’s okay Hun, everyone needs a cheat day.

On and on it goes.

Hey I’m not judging you!  God knows at one stage or another I’ve been guilty of all these things as well and know I will fail again in future.  I’m just saying that there’s no expectation from anyone else that we’ll actually make it happen when we say we’re going to do something mind-blowing.  There’s no outside pressure which means that if you have little or no internal pressure, chances of you doing the epic shit is next to zero.  You just become one of those people who talk a big game and walk a safe path.

To make it even more challenging, society has taken the elements which supports commitment and made them ‘bad’.  Saying that they enslave us somehow.  That they stifle us.  That they squash our creativity.

Elements such as planning and routine.  I can’t tell you how much resistance I receive from new clients when I tell them to plan out their days and to schedule EVERYTHING.  Not just your business meetings.  Hell no.  That’s only one part of your life.  If you want a fit body, schedule your training sessions, menu preparation, grocery shopping, meal preparation and eating times.  If you want a good relationship with your partner schedule in date times.  If you want to be a good parent and be present whilst interacting with your kids, schedule in specific times with them.  If you want to work on your personal development, schedule in reading time, meditation time, journaling time.  All of it!  Scheduling and planning in fact frees up your mind so you don’t have to make more decisions on a minute to minute basis than what is needed!   That means you get to use your mind-muscle to make the other decisions that truly matter, like what new product or service can you create that will add tremendous value to your clients and the world at large.  Plus you don’t have to figure out from minute to minute how you’re going to fit in the actions required to achieve your goals.

Making the basics non-negotiable.  I always find it rather astonishing if people ask me if I’m going to train.  I made my training sessions a non-negotiable a looooong time ago.  I don’t ever think about it.  It’s on the schedule, I do it.  I don’t give a shit what the weather is doing or how I’m feeling.  It’s a done deal.  I’ve started doing the same in my business.  Every day I write.  On whatever comes to me.  And I trust that some people will think WTF, but one person will be reading it and it will be exactly what they needed to hear today.  Every day I have coffee time with my boys.  Not negotiable.  My kids are my greatest supporters – in everything I do.  And we wouldn’t have that relationship if I didn’t give them some undivided attention every single day.  Every day I journal.  I can’t imagine starting a day without investigating what’s going on inside and setting myself up for a rocking day.  Every day I eat (LOL okay so that one seems to be a no brainer for most people).  Again, by making the basics in my life non-negotiable I don’t have to think about it which means once again I free my mind up for other things.  Plus when my basics are non-negotiable and I know they are the things that will get me to my committed outcome, it’s a done deal.

The last one I’m going to mention is surrounding yourself with genius.  This is a biggie for people because let’s be honest, if you come from a background which is a huge contrast of where you want to go, you’ve got to let go of some people and surround yourself with those you aspire to be like.  And that’s nerve-wrecking on both sides.  Society likes to put us in containers and you’re kinda expected to hang with your people.  The moment you want to go up (and why would you set a goal that doesn’t have you go up?) those around you start clinging and playing the guilt game.  Plus we’re told that those at the top don’t want us hanging with them.  I’ve found this to be complete bullshit by the way.  I’ve never met a truly successful person who doesn’t want to mentor those with a deep desire to up-level.  They do however have very good detection systems for those who want to learn versus those who just want a leg up.  Huge difference.  Respect that they’ve had to work for everything they’ve achieved – nothing for nothing Darling.  Then surround yourself with those with the same values, the same drive, the same energy that you want to harness and you’re going to see some amazing shifts happening in way less time than you can possibly imagine.

Now consciously you might not be thinking of all these things, but subconsciously you KNOW this to be true.  Which is why most people never make the commitment.

Not the real commitment.

Oh they say the right things and they take a few of the right actions to get started.

But why waste your time and energy if you haven’t made the real commitment?

And why loosely ‘commit’ to so many things other than to distract yourself from what will ultimately really matter?

When we start making a deep level of commitment, we understand that it’s simply not possible to commit to hundreds of things at any given time.  This level of commitment means that we can focus on two or three goals max at a time.  Because we’ve decided to see it through all the way to the end.

All.  The.  Way.  To.  The. End.

So here’s my challenge to you today:  I want you to have a look at your life and:

1.  Define commitment for yourself

2.  Ask yourself, what are you truly committed to achieving this year in your health and fitness, your relationships, and your business or professional life.

3.  Which structures can you put into place to ensure the outcome

4.  Which goals have you set that in retrospect you’re not really 100% committed to that you need to let go of so you can focus on the stuff that really matters to you.

Now it’s time to get rid of the distractions, put your head down, and take the action.

The true hardest part is done Darling.  The rest is easy.

Because ultimately death is inevitable, but thriving is a choice.

PS:  Ready to stop playing at commitment and really get down to business?  Do you know that you’ve tried this a gazillion times before and have a tendency to sway and wander on your own?  Hey – that’s not weakness!  Knowing yourself well enough to own up when you need support is the greatest level of strength shown.  I’ve put together Kick-Start just for you.  Thirty days where we not only set those goals, but get the structure in place to have you rock it out this year and beyond.  Ready to thrive Darling?  Let’s play.

The Will To Win In Every Area Of Your Life

Are you sick and tired of sitting down and trying to figure shit out?

Are you done with feeling like you keep following the steps that’s so clearly working for others yet which delivers no results for you?

Are you still hungry for success?

Are you ready to win?

Then I’m going to give you the same advise I’ve given every executive, leader, high flying entrepreneur and creative I’ve ever coached.

Start learning differently.

Understand that these boys and girls bring me in because there’s some serious shit going down in the company they’re struggling to get through.  Or they want to launch something brand new and have hit a block on how to do it in a way that brings phenomenal results.  Or maybe they’ve just had it with their team and they don’t know what else to do to get better results from them.

I listen to their greatest frustrations and real life problems.  I assess the structure of the departments, the personalities involved in their teams, their strengths and areas of improvement.  Then I look at their physical condition and where they’re at mentally.  We set the outcome goals desired in their business and then I inevitably drop the bomb “Pick your poison of sport and enter an endurance race”.

Never what they expect and yes I absolutely get resistance.  They don’t have time (have I seen their calendar??), they haven’t trained in years, maybe they’ll consider just doing a little 5 km race, it’s not on the current agenda, and on it goes.

But I’m relentless because I know that the learning they will get in doing the race is far greater than any degree.  There is magic in doing endurance racing.  A fact that all my clients who embrace this will attest to.  Because every time they come back from the race, they are their next level self.  And the company goals get smashed in record time.

So let me share some of my learning with you and you can figure out if I’m crazy or if it’s time for you to set that endurance race goal.  Whatever I’m sharing I want you to keep asking, how can I apply this to business?

First things first – the reason I go for the long races is simple: it’s a different mind-set and personality who does the more challenging distances plus the course designers assume you’re more competent so they throw in more technical shit.

People who generally do the fun runs are there for just that – fun.  They chat along the way.   They train when the weather is nice and they’ve had a good night’s sleep and the kids have been little angels and life is just hunkey dorey.

Those who go for endurance are all in.  You train regardless of the weather, the kids, how much sleep you’ve had.  You know the race is going to hurt like a mofo and every session you choose to miss is weakness you bring to the line.  By the way, you can even spot them in the short distance races as doing short races is part of the strategy to do the long ones.  But they don’t walk and they don’t chat.  They are focused and pushing and strategizing all the way.

Secondly my clients are generally high achievers and I know that they will be willing to endure shit tons for feeling accomplished.  You simply don’t feel the same from completing the short distance with hundreds if not thousands of people compared to the long distance which always has fewer numbers.  The longer the distance the smaller the number of participants.  You want to be part of the 1% of the 1%.  Not just another 1.

So let’s jump to the actual day.

Any endurance athlete will tell you that the hardest part of the journey is actually getting to the start line.  The amount of hours you’ve had to put in can be quite astonishing for most people.  Each hour of training represents way more than what appears to be fun to outsiders.  You’ve had to sacrifice something along the way to be out there.  Whether that sacrifice was sleep, spending extra time in bed with your partner, the last episode of Game of Thrones, the party all your mates went to last night which you knew was not even an option if you were to get out today.  You’re also sacrificing pretty dresses and spending thousands on make-up because majority of your money is spent on equipment, race entry fees, coaching fees, supplements, rehabilitation sessions – the list goes on and on.  Sacrifice is part of the game.

Training HURTS!  There’s intervals, power training, endurance training, tempo training.  Physically you’re hurting most of the time.  Actually that’s bullshit – except for the few minutes warming up, you hurt all the time.

Training means training your mind.  You know that you will never finish that race unless you believe you can.  And quite frankly Darling that takes a strong mind.  Your mind will give up long before your body – this is a fact. You stop the moment the voice in your head says “I’m done”.  Game over.  Never before that.  So you have to train that bitch and control her to do your bidding.

Standing on that start line there’s a level of respect between the competitors that you won’t find anywhere else.  You look around and you truly SEE people for who they are.  You don’t just see the skinny bodies – you see the hours of dedication, sacrifice, determination, focus.   You see them raw – trust me, everyone is shitting themselves.  You see magnificence.  Whether they get to the finish line today or not doesn’t matter.  They’ve earned the right to stand next to you.  And you bow down to that with respect (of course also mentally comparing yourself and picking at least one that you’re determined to beat to the finish line.  Oh come on!  It’s fun!)

Then the gun goes off and so do you.  Adrenaline wants to take over and this is your first call to discipline and strategy.  You have to know yourself, what’s your strength and what’s your weakness?  I know I’m slow as shit, but I’m a diesel engine baby.  I can keep going at the same pace for-fucking-ever.  I’ve learned that getting caught up in the excitement of the start and going balls to the walls bites me in the ass every time.  I blow and then my goose is cooked.  So I slow down to speed up.  This is MY race!

Oh that’s the other thing.  Most people who do endurance races are NOT there to compete against others.  They are ultimately there to compete against themselves.  Against the pain in their bodies.  The pain in their minds.  How far and how hard can they push themselves today?  Which obstacles can they overcome?  Which barriers can they break through?

Then there’s the journey that happens on the race.  There’s an emotional roller coaster that you won’t find anywhere else.

You start off feeling like the Hulk – Yeah, I’m invincible.  I’ve got this!

Then creeps in the lows – OMG this is hurting so much, everyone is overtaking me, I’m such a loser, of fuck I don’t think I can make it to the end.

There’s hope – Wooohoooo a water table!  I’ve made it to the water table.  Oh thank you God for the water table.

Anger – who the fuck designed this course?  I’m going to kill the asshole.  What were they thinking adding all these hills?  Inconsiderate bastards.

Determination – I will show you motherfuckers!  You’re not going to beat me today.

More hope – only 5 kms to go.  I can do this.  Fuck yeah!  I’ve got this bitch.  All the way, all the way.

The darkness – I can’t do it.  So near yet so far.  Where’s the fucking end????  They said only 2 more kilometers and I swear I’ve done another 5.  Lying bastards.  It hurts so much.  I don’t want to do this anymore.  Where’s my mommy?

Along the way you see others ending the journey due to injury or fatigue.  Not all days are created equal.  Every athlete knows this.  Every athlete knows that you can do all the preparation, all the work, and on the day something goes wrong and it’s just game over.  Your heart goes out to these athletes.  You always call out to them, acknowledging how far they’ve come.  There’s so much camaraderie and compassion on these races.  Nobody ever relishes in the failure of another.  There’s a lot humanity can learn here.

And then, finally, you hear it.  The music playing.  The voice over the speaker system.

Oh,

Thank you God!

I

Can

Do

This!

You dig deeper than you thought you had.  Your legs pick up speed.  You have no idea where the strength is coming from, but it’s there.  It’s been there all along.  You just had to get rid of all the BS stories and the ego to uncover it.

When you get to that finish line the crowd goes wild.  They don’t care how long it’s taken you.  They don’t care what position you came in.  In fact with majority of the seriously hard-core races you will find the winners back at the finish line to honor the last athlete.  Because they know it hurt that warrior way more.  We acknowledge that at endurance races.

There’s the elation – that lasts about 5 seconds by the way.  I’m not even kidding.

The last bit of adrenaline soaks the ground around you and the real pain sets in.  You crumble to the floor and you promise yourself and everyone around you that you will NEVER do this crazy shit again.  You’re done!  You’re hanging up the boots.

Three days later you’re sitting on Google looking for the next race.  That’s the true addiction of accomplishment.

Shit this piece is getting long and I can say so much more.  I can write a book!  Maybe that’s what I’ll do.

But are you starting to get it?  Can you see how all of this can be applied to every one of your goals, whether in business or your relationships or your lifestyle?

Do you get it?

Can you see why the CEO of a multi-million dollar company will come back from this event and walk into that boardroom a changed man?  A wiser, more powerful man.   A man who’s in it for the long haul and thinks strategy rather than adrenaline.  Because somewhere along the line he stopped comparing himself to the rest of the field and went inside.  Understanding that nobody is going to get him to the finish line other than himself.

If you don’t, get on a call with me and I’ll help you connect the dots because this shit is life changing.

Stop looking around you!  Fucking nobody is going to make you successful.  That’s all up to you Darling.

Yes people can share with you what has worked for them.  But personally very little of what works for others works for me and I’m willing to bet you’re the same.

That’s because you’re a leader, not a follower.

You’re a creator not a consumer.

When will you take the plunge and start the journey to your endurance race?  Because you and I both know it all starts with a decision.  A decision to say HELL YES to yourself and getting the fuck out of your comfort zone.  It’s about embracing the learning and the journey and a willingness to face your own demons.

I can guarantee it will hurt.

I can guarantee it will change you.

If not now, then when?

If not you, then why the fuck not?

Death is inevitable.   Thriving is a choice.

 

With love,

A

PS:   Not quite ready for this extreme but wanting to take a first step in connecting the dots and starting the power of unlocking your wisdom?  Then SQUAT is for you Darling.  In 5 weeks I will take you through a structured program of working up to 250 squats working on mind-set, goal setting, uncovering your big why, and so much more.  Check out SQUAT today and let’s start your journey.  Don’t be put off by the ridiculously low price.  This program works!