Happily ever after and other lessons I got from watching fairy tales.

I love fairy tales and watching movies with my children.  This evening we watched Cinderella. Not the animated movie but the real life Cinderella.

I know the story well. I read it often as a child and the lessons from this story never fail to inspire me.

In Cinderella’s story her mother dies, changing her life forever.  What she once knew as normal no longer is.

Consider this; What is a normal life?

You may have experienced sadness, grief, trauma or a little bit of lost-ness at some point in time.  You may have stuffed up big time or even forgotten your dreams.

In my own life I have experienced the loss of loves ones, children, broken marriages and even a little of myself. I have had  huge dreams and at times been to afraid to follow them. I have played small, hidden my brilliance for fear of being perceived arrogant. I’ve forgotten dreams or pushed them far inside a drawer never to see the light of day.

There have been times where I have questioned my existence and wondered about life.  At the end of the day no-one can be responsible for my dreams or your dreams, forgotten or hidden.

In the movie Cinderella’s mother leaves her with these words.  “What ever you do and what ever happens to you remember to have courage and be kind” 

These words become her guiding light. Treated badly by her step mother and steps sisters Cinderella continues to be kind. In her quite space (the attic) she remembers her dreams, the promises she made to her self, to her mother and her father and she recalls her past happy memories that provide her with hope for the future.

I’m here to tell you that if you had a time where you’ve been a Cinderella, been treated poorly, lost your hope or your dream, it’s time to rekindle the flame. Come out of hiding, shine your light, put on your glass slippers and follow your dream.

The story that many of you know, ends well. Cinderella’s prince finds her, but before he fits her with the glass slipper she stands before him, not in her beautiful glamorous ball gown but just as she is.

A commoner, a simple girl from the country who loves him,

Real. Authentic. True.

They kiss….. Aaaaaaw and walking from the room Cinderella forgives her wicked step mother.

Yes, she forgives her stepmother. Now that takes courage.

What are you holding onto that needs forgiveness? Give it some thought. Un-forgiveness can keep you from moving forward and stop you from living a life filled with peace.

Shit happens and often we are left worse for the wear. Heart broken, used and abused.  The choice to stay this way or hold on to the past is entirely up to you.

A quote I heard a few years ago and I still remember is this;

Un-forgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the person who did you an injustice to die.

It’s never going to happen… the only person it harms is you.  Take my advice, grab a piece of paper and go and sit somewhere quite. Write down all the people who have wronged you, burn the paper or crinkle it up and throw it away.

Forgive them so you can move on.

Whether you choose to stay bruised, down and out or you continue to buy into the excuses as to why things never work out for you or you decide to tap into your courage, lift your head high and walk down the path with faith and trust that a new day will bring you one step closer to the real you – the amazing, gorgeous, brilliant YOU, created through trial and tribulation… is entirely up to you.

Your story can have a “happily ever after” too.

With a little bit of courage, a dash of kindness, a sprinkle of magic and forgiveness you can let go of the things that no longer serve you to create an ever after that helps you to become the person you were created to be.

Brenda AnnThis week’s blog was written by the amazing Brenda Tsiaousis.  Brenda is a Potentialist, Business Success Mentor and Connector of Dreams. Her mission is to empower women in business globally to realize their full potential as leaders and successful entrepreneurs using a potent combination of business strategy, mindset and incredible faith to quickly facilitate change, find their edge and grow their business. Hang out with Brenda on Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/brendatsiaousis or visit her website; www.brendatsiaousis.com

The Silent Warrior – Finding your wisdom

This is my personal truth.

It is said that we are living in the age of information.  So isn’t it amazing that in a world where there is an over-flow of information that so few people live in a state of wisdom?  What’s the difference you ask?  Knowledge is knowing, wisdom is living it.  I like to think of wisdom as knowledge in action.

I sometimes get the impression that there is simply too much knowledge available to people, their brains are literally over-stimulated on a continuous basis.  This leads to a situation whereby instead of embracing a specific area and becoming an expert, they simply feel overwhelmed and stay in a haze of average.  I have come to the conclusion that overwhelm is the virus keeping society in a diseased state of average.  Knowing a little about a lot, but not knowing a lot about a select few topics.  It is almost as if people fear becoming an expert in something because Oh My God, what am I losing out on???

I still feel that this is where we might have gone wrong.  In days past, people would apprentice and dedicate their entire lives to a specific craft.  The masters would really immerse themselves in this and make it their mission to know everything about their chosen field.  Continuously expanding it.  Staying curious.  Passionate.  Dedicated.  Committed (does this word even still exist in the modern day dictionary?)

Yet as technology advanced and people have more and more access to more and more, giving them limitless amounts of choices, majority of humanity seems to have lost their wisdom.  And now it’s almost as if they look around, try some things out, and if it is hard and doesn’t feel good immediately, they write it off and move on to the next thing.  I have news for you:  everything new is hard in the beginning.  Everything new feels uncomfortable in the beginning.  It’s called growth!

In many ways I’m grateful that I’m old fashioned when it comes to technology.  I don’t enjoy sitting on Google the way my kids do and cram my head full of knowledge about everything and anything.  Instead you will find me daily with a book on my chosen field of personal development.  It keeps me focused and I really get to absorb what the writer is trying to convey to me.  His / her personal methodologies and truths.

I have learned by now that humans are more complex than what most realize which means that methodologies cannot be applied literally.  No matter how highly I rate the expert in the field, their methods don’t always work for me.  Instead I need to take the underlying knowledge, and find a way to translate it into my personal wisdom.

Take for example the immense wisdom regarding the creative mind as given in the book “Grow Rich While You Sleep” by Ben Sweetland.  Mr Sweetland states that our most powerful entity is the creative (also known as the subconscious) mind which is best activated whilst the conscious mind is asleep.  Literally.  Now I agree with Ben that my creative mind is way more powerful than my conscious mind when it comes to my business and my coaching, in fact to my life in general.  But I don’t wake up with these insights the way that he did.  Instead, I have my greatest break-through ideas whilst training.  Not just any training.  Those really long sessions when I get past the chatter in my head and it goes quiet.  By the time I get to the finish I will normally have many solutions or ideas which I have previously struggled with.  Even this insight was gained on a run.

It got me thinking even further of how I have applied wisdom in my life, in ways that are quite possibly unique to me even if in small ways.  For instance, don’t ask me to meditate by focusing on my breath.  But give me some music to quiet my mind and I can go into the zone in no time.  Goal setting is highly effective, but don’t ask me to set goals for 20 years from now when I know I move mountains when I set 6 month goals instead.

The point of this blog today is this:  Use knowledge to find your own wisdom in a way that feels right for you.  Don’t take knowledge so literal, instead get the core of the message and see how you can live it in your life and then actually apply it!  It is no use that your head is crammed full of knowledge yet your actions are that of an uneducated person.

And limit your choices by focusing on mastery.  If this seems like a big ask, then try it for 6 months and see how or if your life changes.  After all, this is my personal truth and might not be yours.  But you will never find your personal truth unless you try on another person’s version.  Every master had to start somewhere – and that somewhere was by observing another master.

Walk with honor.

If my work resonates with you, you might want to check out my services here.

The Silent Warrior – Calling My Tribe

This is my personal truth.

Dear Warrior Maiden

It is time to take up your arms and fight to heal the Earth!

For so long have our voices been suppressed by a society where conformity is enforced and those who dare stand out are viciously pulled back down.

Those with fire and purpose persevere and get above the reach of those who hate them.  I thank them for setting the way for us.  But they have been the minority.

It’s time for change.

It is time for the women of this world to stop their shit and live their purpose.  It’s time for us to stand together as a tribe, support each other, encourage each other, and fight next to each other.  I don’t care what you look like or what your voice sounds like.  I don’t care if your weapon is coaching, or bringing beauty through design, or healing through massage or yoga.  I care that you use your weapon despite what others may call you.

For those who work so hard to hate us, fuck you!  You can take your judgement and shove it up your arse!  Because YOU are killing our children!  YOU are creating a world where our youth are so despondent that they would rather end their lives than see the possibilities the future may hold.  Because you judge their experimentation and expression of themselves.  You with your high and mighty stance that if someone looks different they are evil.  When will you realize that YOU are the only fucking evil in this world!!!  The next generation of souls are evolved way past our understanding, yet you try to put them into your tiny little boxes and put them on drugs so that they can behave in a way with which you can cope.  Your judgement and rules are suffocating our children.

Enough and no more!

Rise with me sisters!  For our children do not yet have the worldly experience and tools needed to win this fight for themselves.

Rise with me sisters!  Take up your arms and use your beautiful gifts to heal the world.  To give the next generation hope so that they will push through the bullshit they are being fed from the moment they can hear, find their own gifts and live magnificent lives of purpose, focus and passion.

Rise with me sisters!  Because standing alone we can heal a city, but standing together we can heal the world!

Rise with me sisters!  For our future depends on us.

Walk with honor.

The Silent Warrior

The Silent Warrior – You called me a what?

This is my personal truth.

I’ve always known that I didn’t conform to the average by which I was surrounded.  I have never been able to just do what I’m told if it didn’t make sense to me, or if there was a deep knowing inside of me that what I was told to do had more to do with another person’s ego than what was good for me.

It started with ‘cheeky’, it progressed to ‘bitch’, and this week-end I was even called a ‘father-fucker’ to my face.  Well technically he was right.  I do have two amazing boys and I love making love to the man who fathered them.  But I’m sure we both know that is not what was meant.

Here is what I have learned in my 43 years of existence about these names that people give us.

First of all, sociology teaches us that every society requires rules to keep us safe and to maintain peace.  Personal opinion:  the current rules are not fucking working anymore people!!!  The rules I see enforced on us from childhood is more about fitting in (a box) than keeping us safe.  More about having everyone ‘feeling good about themselves’ than to promote an evolving society.  Personally, I can’t remember when last I went to bed ‘feeling safe’ but that is for another blog.

There is a psychological methodology called personal construct theory.  It states that in order for people to make sense of their world, they form constructs (basic ideas) on which everything else is build.  The more we experience and expand our lives and our worlds, the more constructs we have available to us and the bigger our world.  Nice in theory – not so nice in a society filled with mediocrity where a lot of people appear to be resistant to new learning and expansion of their personal truths.  They have one box into which everything must fit otherwise it’s considered as ‘wrong’.

What I’m finding is that a large portion of our population have basic labels (constructs) for other people.  When the people are ‘nice’ and they ‘like’ them because they do  what they are told to do to fit in with everyone else, they are given ‘nice’ labels e.g. ‘she is such a good girl / good mother / good wife / caring and giving woman’.  These labels are given to encourage more of the same behavior.  But heaven forbid you should not fit into those predetermined constructs and they simply cannot make head or tail of you true brilliance!  They will call you a bitch / a whore / a slut / greedy / obstinate.  If you are a powerful woman, I’m sure you can add a few more.

And guess when we are given these labels?  When we stand out from the crowd.  When we do things differently.  When we no longer buy into the bullshit we’ve been fed our entire lives and instead find our own voices.  When we stand up for ourselves and our loved ones.  When we refuse to be held down any longer.  When we do not back down.  And yes, it is still much worse for women than it is for men even in this day and age.  Go figure…

But words have no power unless you give them power.  They have no meaning except for the meaning you assign to them.  So let those who do not understand your brilliance label you.  You were never born to accumulate ‘nice’ labels.  You were born to change the world into a better place.  Let those who cannot comprehend the power that is within you label you with whatever words they so desire.  Continue pushing the envelope.  Continue to live beyond the realm of constructs.  Your soul is the entire universe and the entire universe is your soul.  Whose mind can possibly comprehend the enormity of that power?

So call me whatever you want.  For all the constructs in the world cannot possibly encompass my magnificence.  And your labels are meaningless in my purpose to inspire.

Call me whatever you want.  I am beyond the scope of your words.

Walk with honor.

If my work resonates with you, you might want to check out my services here.

The Silent Warrior – What if?

This is my personal truth.

With the SkyRun no longer happening this year, and with the move to New Zealand, I have taken the last couple of weeks a notch down replacing my rigorous training with relaxed runs with my puppies.  No heart rate monitor, no tracking of time, distance, speed.  Nothing.  Just running for the pure pleasure of running.

It’s interesting what we can learn when we stay in the moment and open our eyes and our minds.  I have learned so much about myself and society in general simply by observing my dogs.  Chrissie specifically, as she is truly her mother’s daughter.  Strong-willed, feisty, not giving a shit about the rules of how she is supposed to behave.  I’m sure you can understand why I adore her!

I used to run with her on a leash.  She would strain against that rope with all her strength, pulling me along, getting frustrated with my pace if I wasn’t going fast enough.  Getting annoyed when I wanted to keep going and she wanted to investigate a peculiar smell or whatever else wanted her attention.  She was also extremely aggressive, barking at everyone who would dare come close to us and I’m sure she tried to nip a couple of other dogs.

Then one day I decided screw it, and I took her off the leash.  OMG the pure joy that radiated off my puppy as she ran at inhuman speeds!  To this day I am in awe of watching her when she is allowed to do her own thing.  She will dash off, go explore but never losing sight of me.  Sniff around until she is satisfied with what is going on then dash back to me.  I have learned to just keep going at my own pace and trust that she will always return.  She is also a lot less aggressive when she is free.  Oh don’t get me wrong!  She is still extremely cheeky and won’t let any dog intimidate her, no matter what their size!  But she will give her loud opinion and then keep going.  It is as if the leash constrained her and made her fearful and the only way she could react was through aggression!

I realized this week that so many of us are like Chrissie.  I know I can only speak for myself, but living on the leash of societal rules just never worked for me!  I was frustrated with the pace.  I was frustrated with not being able to stop and explore whenever I wanted to.  I was frustrated with the direction I was supposed to go into.  And I was a real aggressive bitch because being this ‘nice’ girl so that others would like me left me open to being hurt all the time.

We were born pretty fucking perfect.  And then we get told that we don’t fit into the mold of perfection as decided by some asinine unseen power of man.  We always have the wrong skin color no matter what the color.  We are overweight or underweight.  We don’t start talking early enough.  Then we talk too much.  We don’t start walking at the right age.  Then we walk too fast / too slow / like a duck.  We don’t think enough.  We think too much, question too much.  We should move our asses.  We should sit still otherwise we have ADD.  We should have a boyfriend, we should be single.  We should be married, we should get divorced.  We should have 2.5 children.  We should have a steady job.  We should be an entrepreneur.  WTF?!  Is it any wonder that society is filled with aggressive bitches on a leash of frustration????

My LifeMy ChoicesWhat would happen if you took the leash off?

Don’t get me wrong – when you have been on a leash your entire life, it is bloody scary at first.  Other dogs and their owners will be very quick to tell you to get back into your place!  Put the leash back on!  What the hell were you thinking?

But oh, the freedom of running at your own pace.  The freedom of exploring and thinking for yourself and being willing to take chances and live life on your own rules, it’s nothing short of miraculous.

I believe that this is what the Universe intended for us in the first place.  To explore life and the world with an energy of joy instead of this horrendous auto-pilot martyrdom which most humans seem to be living.

As I continue my journey off my leash, I’m finding more and more amazing women along the way who have broken free as well.  They are fighting for a change in the world so that more people can live freely, wake up with joy, create a better earth for everyone.

I don’t want my children to live on a leash one day.  Do you?

Walk with honor.

If my work resonates with you, you might want to check out my services here.

The Silent Warrior – Remembering My Balls

This is my personal truth.

When you find yourself sitting in front of your journal at 1 am, merely hours from driving to the Sky Run training camp, you know that you had better dig deep because your Soul is trying to get through to your mind.

Ever since I had faced my demons at Sky Run 2014, I have been preparing to conquer this particular beast this year.  I have sacrificed rest to train, stayed focused and dedicated all this time, and I was ready to go go go!

Yet life has the amazing ability to continuously change and bring new wonders and adventures.  And this has been one of the most exciting years of my life – EVER!  I have up-skilled myself through an international academy, taken my business from local to global, and the cherry on top:  manifested a move to New Zealand!  All of this whilst staying on top of being a mom, wife, daughter, athlete, full-time entrepreneur, kick-ass woman…

But sitting with my pen lightly flowing over the page and seeing the words appear, I am reminded of my balls.

jugglerApproximately ten years ago I came to the conclusion that this life is all about juggling balls.  Most people only have a couple of balls, and they juggle mindlessly in robotic fashion.  Some people have lots of balls and look completely frantic and out of control.  And then you get the master jugglers:  the elite performers who have mastered the skill of juggling numerous balls at any given time, looking relaxed as each briefly touches their hands before being guided back into the air.  And as you become more skilled, you can start adding balls, touching each for a slightly shorter time.  As dynamic warriors we become used to juggling at high speed, and it becomes our norm so at times we’re not even aware of exactly how many balls are in the air at any given time.

Thing is:  all master jugglers still drop balls.  Like all elite cyclists still fall off their bikes.  All pro trail runners still fall and scrape their knees.  Shit happens.

This brings me to the next insight:  We have rubber balls and glass balls.

Rubber balls are colorful and add variety and spice to life.  You can drop rubber balls and they will either roll away and go lie in the corner, ready to be picked up again at another time, or bounce and you can catch them and continue the motion.

Glass-Ball-of-Life-WallpaperBut glass balls are perishable.  If dropped and you are lucky,  they will crack.  You can pick them up and continue juggling, but they are forever changed and you know if you drop them again it will be the end of them.  In my experience though, when dropped, these balls shatter and no amount of glue can put them back together again.

In my life I have 3 glass balls:  my marriage, my family, my health.  My three most treasured balls which take priority above all else!  And when life gets super exciting and I am juggling numerous balls and find that there is even a remote chance of missing a beat, I will drop those rubber balls like hot potatoes and refocus on my glass balls first.

On the 23rd of October 2015 at 1:30 am, I realized that the SkyRun is a rubber ball, and my family needed me now!

Let me first explain how amazing my family is:  they support me in my crazy endeavors NO MATTER WHAT.  They never  ask me to give up on any of my dreams, and they never share their concerns about me with me.  Yet the response when I let them know that I was staying at home was an extremely audible sigh of relief.  That was when I realized that right now, my boys need me to be at home and hold them at night.  They need to not worry about what happens to me in the mountain whilst they are studying for exams and packing up to move.  My husband needs me to stay in one piece and get the family across the ocean safely so that our little unit can be whole once again.  My folks need me to relax with them on the remaining week-ends, eating good steak and drinking beer.

Make no mistake!  Putting a rubber ball down is NOT easy.  Especially not one that you have been keeping in the air for 11 months!  However, my glass balls need my unwavering attention right now, and that is what they will get.

I am truly a believer in the fact that we can have our cake and eat it.  We can have anything we desire in life.  But I have also learned along the way that I’m not a sprinter – I’m an endurance athlete.  And in the race we call life, I’m quite happy to go at a slower pace and really enjoy the journey.  I will get to everything that I want to – I will even become a Sky Runner one day.  It might not be in the Drakensburg, it might be in another mountain.  But this particular rubber ball will stay by my feet until one day I am ready to pick him up again.

When last have you taken the time to look at all the balls you are juggling? When last have you named them?  When last have you identified rubber vs glass?  When last have you taken stock?

Don’t wait until 1 am!  Because when you drop a glass ball and it shatters, you will regret expecting all balls to bounce back.

Walk with honor.

The Silent Warrior – The Kitten Finds Her Roar

This is my personal truth.

43 today.  Fuck, it feels amazing.

Journaling this morning was given to reflection of what it took for me to get to this point.

Strangely, I have always felt that I was born in the wrong place, into the wrong culture.  It is really no wonder that I was constantly in shit.

For as long as I can remember I questioned the rules and found them fucked up.  I never understood why children should not be heard, why we had to respect our elders when majority of them clearly showed no respect to us, why women should be subservient – barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen.  I didn’t believe in corporal punishment and saw it as a weakness on the side of the adult who could not contain their own temper.

In a culture that demands unconditional submission, I’m sure you can understand why I received so many hidings both physically and emotionally.  Finally I gave up – gave in to the idea that you can’t fart against thunder.  And so I would give soft meows when I wanted to say something and purred when I received approval.

I was playing by the rules and I fucking hated the game.

Then, after 40, something began to change.  I was no longer satisfied with empowering others but still seeking approval in my own life.  Approval from those I love and those that I didn’t know from a bar of soap.  I thought that in order for me to be accepted in the professional arena, I had to speak like a lady, behave like a lady, surround myself with other ladies.

But what if the lady was not a pussy cat?  What if instead she was an amazingly powerful lion???  What if she was so passionate that fucked up societal rules to keep you in your place (they call it respect) could no longer contain her?  What if she could strut into the arena with her head held high and just not give a shit if strangers could not see her beauty, her grace, her power – just because it made the other cats look like pussies?  And what would happen the day that she roared??

That is exactly what happened to me this year and it was magical.

What I found was that there is an entire pride of lionesses out there that was waiting for me to find my voice!  A pride who have stepped into their personal power and like me, questioned what they have been told for so long.  A pride that called out to me and took me into their circle without hesitation or judgement.  I am finally home.

The world has more than enough pussies.  And the fact of the matter is, that holistically, things are not working because the rules that have governed our behaviour for so long, does not make sense to the younger generations and therefore have a negative effect on society as a whole.  Instead the world needs more lionesses who will tap into their power, gracefully say ‘fuck it’, and have their unique voices heard.

I know that not everyone will understand this blog.  And please don’t get me wrong – I completely respect the fact that we are all different.  Some people thrive in the safety of the rules.  They have a desire to fit in and not upset the apple cart.  That is perfect too – as long as they are being authentic to their true selves.  Nature has more varieties of animals than we even know of, and humans are as diverse and unique.  There is place for all of us.

At age 43 I am finally free from wearing the suffocating masks.  No, not everyone likes me.  And that is okay with me.  I wasn’t born to be a people pleaser.  Love me or hate me, you will never forget me.

i AMBecause today I am woman – hear me ROAR!!!

The Silent Warrior – Be amazed by the gorgeous Anna Hughes

This is my personal truth.

One of the perks of my life is the fact that I am constantly meeting the most amazing women from around the world who inspire me through their personal experiences.  Today I share with you the story of a woman who have introduced me to the concept of a life-gasm.  I’m sure that you will agree with me that the world needs more people like Anna Hughes.

It was the day I decided to take full ownership of my life even when at the time I could barely foresee what direction my life would take.

And I thought giving birth to my daughters was tough. That certainly changed my life.

But little did I anticipate what a moment of total surrender under the grueling heat in the Sahara Desert would lead to. Time is only relative as I am still getting goosebumps savoring in the achievements from being a finisher of the Marathon des Sables.

I had prepared for this ultra marathon for 1.5 years. Well before that, back in 1999(!), I had seen a documentary on TV and in that moment a burning desire in me evoke from deep, deep inside.

This dream settled inside of me for 10 years!

I had the absolute faith that I was going to reach that goal one day and cross that finish line. wanted it so truly, madly and deeply that I literally became obsessed about turning this BIG DESIRE into reality.

I remember being entirely fueled up by the pure thought of running in the dunes, on dried lakes with barely any shade to cool off.

Something ticked inside me. I could not explain what it was. I just BELIEVED that I could do it. And took inspired action.

Every minute of the day I would think about it. I could feel the vibes through my body. Talk about LIFE-GASM.

I dedicated my free time to prepare for that race in the midst of raising two young kids at the time. It is all possible if you have the ABSOLUTE WILL.

I optimized my nutrition, training and equipment and invested tons of hours into meditation and visualization techniques.

Unapologetically, I took ownership of this desire feeling that I had already made it to that finish line. I felt invigorated my all those positive thoughts and felt in the best shape I had ever been in came race day.
I raced like an animal. As if my life depended on it. There was a magical power that busted open.

But…on the road to success there are obstacles to overcome. I got the flu three days prior to flying to Moroc. I lost weight. For a minute I felt devastated that my dream would be out of reach. That I would not make it to the start line.

But I did not give up. I did not lose FAITH that I would make it no matter what.
I wanted to succeed and perform on the highest level possible for me.

Fast forward to Day 4 of the 250 K long race. After having been on my feet for 11 hours I began hallucinating. I had a tunnel vision focusing on just setting one foot in front of the other.

My thoughts became clearer and clearer. I dropped a huge burden and left in somewhere en route in the desert.

My family appeared before my inner eye, I looked at the two wonderful bracelets reminding me of my kids’ unconditional support. I felt so grateful at that moment where I was being left with only the bare essentials of food, water, some spare clothes and my own good company.

From that moment onwards I knew there was nothing and no one stopping me from getting to that finish line.

The POWER of my thoughts, my indestructible mindset had taken over.

On Day 6 I crossed the finish line and collapsed into the arms of the race director who wrapped the medal around my neck. I cried my eyes out and never felt so grateful.

I could not believe my own belief. I had made it. I had captured my biggest desire at the time. The medal representing so much more than pain, heat and blistery feet.

That day transformed my life forever.

Up until today that flow has not stopped. The experience has enabled me to play the bigger game in life.

I want to remind you to follow your dreams and desires. Always. Unapologetically. Becoming the biggest version of yourself. It is possible. Without the slightest doubt.

Every one else around you will benefit from your glorious aura as an empowered woman.

Are you ready to take the leap and succeed at an elite level you never thought possible?

Are you ready to take ownership of your feminine power and rock it out in the world?

#1: Take that first step today. Tapping on your desire that gets you burning from the inside out and that totally invigorates you.

#2: Take the first action step toward that goal now. Commit to following a clear plan and nothing will stop you from living a life less ordinary.

LIFE-GASMS guaranteed!

The Silent Warrior – Players and Spectators

This is my personal truth.

The rugby world cup has started again which makes for some pretty interesting times in our home.  To see how excited we all get whilst watching the game would probably have most people rolling on the floor with laughter.  Yet, we take the sport of spectatorship really serious – well, some of us more seriously than others.

I took a moment to reflect on this from a different angle today and realized how this entire phenomenon of the spectator vs the player plays out in our every-day lives.

First there are the players.  The people who are IN the game.  The ones who are committed to achieving their goals, winning in their lives.  It is a disciplined life where sacrifices are made.  Sometimes you have to say no to the parties that everybody else is going to.  Most days you have to get up early and drag your ass out of bed to train, to plan, to work, to do what needs to be done.  There are sore bodies to deal with.  Everybody gets injured along the way.  And you know that no matter how much you train, no matter how much you learn, no matter how much you prepare, winning is not guaranteed.  It all comes down to the day.  You learn to pray.  You learn to give it your all.  You learn to deal with pain, with aching lungs.  You learn to deal with disappointment.  Because sometimes you don’t see the gap, or you miss the ball, or you aim in the wrong direction.  And if you don’t win today, you will go back, get up earlier, train harder, get a new game plan, and try again.  You will ask for the input from the spectators, to show you what you have missed, where you can do better, and you will incorporate all relevant feedback into your game plan.  Whether in rugby, running, marriage, or business – you are a player.

Then there are spectators.  The people who only watch the game.  Sometimes they are experts at the rules – knowing exactly how the game should be played in order to win.  They have a birds eye view and can see the gaps which players sometimes miss.  They are pumped full of adrenaline and jump up and down – cheering and jeering all the time.  They praise the wins and curse the losses.  They can be unforgiving because they have forgotten what it feels like to have your muscles screaming and your lungs burning as you give it your all, but that is not enough today.  They get swept up in the energy of the crowd, and sweep up those around them.  Sometimes unforgiving, the spectators expect those they back to win at all cost!  To play perfectly every day, every time.  And if you don’t win today, they expect you to go back, to get up earlier, to train harder, to get a new game plan and to do better next time.  They will go home and continue sleeping in and wait for the next game so they can watch, support and criticize.  Whether in rugby, running, marriage, or business – these are the spectators.

Thing is, there can be no game without players and spectators.  But have you ever noticed how few players there are compared to spectators?  Some of us choose to be both.  In my life I am always the player, but I have chosen the role of spectator as a coach to give my clients my birds eye view.  To teach them the rules as I understand them.  To provide them feedback on lost opportunities and what they can try differently next time.  Being a player as well, I can do this with compassion.  Because I still hurt, my muscles still scream, my lungs still burn.  I still play.  And I welcome the input of other players taking on the role of spectators!  Because these are the people who not only know the rules, but who knows that winning the game is all about mind-set.  And mind-set is not understood if you only live in the stands.

So what are you?  Are you a player or a spectator?  And more importantly, does this choice serve to create a life that will leave others in awe at your magnificence?

Is it time to get off the stand and on to the playing field?

Walk with honor.

The Silent Warrior – Learning the true meaning of faith on a trail run

This is my personal truth.

It’s been a while since I’ve come here to run.  The terrain is truly beautiful, but challenging both mentally and physically.  The early morning sun is beating down on my face and I’m loving the clean air that is filling my lungs as I start out on the trail.

With only eight weeks to go until the SkyRun, and my lower back telling me that I’m getting old, I have to start training harder but smarter.  That is why I drove out to Kloofendal Nature Reserve this morning for a three hour training session.  It is quiet here.  I’ve only seen one person so far which means nobody to encourage me to keep pushing – it is all up to me.

The beauty of the land keeps me captivated and I eagerly climb up as I know the view from the top is going to be spectacular!!  I love climbing up.  Yes it is hard on the legs, on the glutes, on the lungs.  And at times I wonder how much further until I reach some flat land just to catch my breath.  But I can always see the next step, I can always look ahead to pick out the best route.  And I love the view from the top!  Who doesn’t?

Not so on the downhills.  In fact, this is where my greatest challenge lies.  I’m shit scared of heights and rocky descends.  And going downhill my mind starts playing sneaky games with me.  Showing me landslides about to explode the moment I step on the wrong stone.  Making my body tense which I know is more likely to lead to an accident, but I simply can’t help myself.  I try to focus on my breathing, to get out of my head.  Change the voices that tell me devastation lies ahead to ones that are more empowering,  telling me I can do this, just keep going.

As I approach a particularly steep drop, my steps falter and I slow down.  It seems that the path completely disappears!  I can see a trail on the other side going up, but I cannot see a humanly possible way to get there.  What the hell????

kids downhillThat is when it dawns on me – THIS is faith.  The knowing that even though I can’t see the ‘how’, the Universe has already laid the trail.  It is easy to have faith when you can see the next step.  But when the path disappears, you have to have the faith of a child, throw caution and fear to the wind and run like a complete maniac, trusting.   All I have to do is to trust and keep moving forward.  And like magic, the next step appears.  It is the most astonishing thing!  Every time I take a step forward, the view changes, and the next step appears as if out of thin air!!!

I start thinking of my life.  Of how I have set goals which seemed impossible at the outset, and quite frankly most of the way as well.  But I could see the desired end.  I knew that someone else has already accomplished this goal, somewhere, at some time.  Which means that it is possible.  And then all I do is commit and keep taking one step forward every single day, keeping the faith.  I don’t always understand the steps that I take.  And sometimes I slip and fall.  But I get back up, look around, and find a better path.

I have a deep faith in the Universe.  I believe that I am fully supported on my path and that even though things look like a mess from where I stand at times, God has a perfect view from above and he knows where I should turn next.  I guess that is why I can do the crazy shit I do…

He also knows me well – and understands that I’m not the most patient person.  I like shit to happen now!  So at times, he simply provides me the people who will give me a different perspective, a different view:  my husband, my mom, my dad, a mastermind partner, my boys, a coach, whoever is most suited for the specific part of my journey.  And by giving me this view, I can make better choices and get faster results.

Where in your life have you stopped because you cannot see the next step?  Where in your life is faith the missing link to getting to your desired finish line?

If you are feeling completely stuck, just take one step!  Just one!  I dare you!  Because as long as you stand still your view doesn’t change.  It is only by moving that you can get a different perspective.  And it is only through movement that we demonstrate faith and give the Universe an opportunity to do some magic.

Take that step!

Walk with honor.