The insanity of living to impress others…


who the hell are you trying to impress so much
that you’re willing to work yourself into a state of exhaustion
with little or no lasting satisfaction?

Who the hell are you trying to prove wrong
when they said you were not smart enough
not good enough
not enough
that you’re willing to live without an ounce of true integrity?

Who the hell do you think will finally give you the recognition
you so desperately crave

that you never received as a little girl
that you’re willing to cut off pieces uniquely you so that you will fit the picture they left in your ego mind?

Who the actual hell?

I’m sorry to tell you
but you’ll NEVER get what you want
because those you desire to put you on a Pedestal Of Awesome
are so lost themselves
you’re setting them
and you
up for failure.


This cycle of brilliant women walking around with socks in their panties
all the while allowing their pussies to go to sleep
through shame, pain and rejection
has got to come to an end now.

It’s up to US,
to reclaim our power
our freedom
our inherent creativity
which does not happen on the kitchen floor
or in the pages of technical how-to books
but from a space of absolute
deeply connected to our bodies
where minds are liberated
through #lifegasmic energy
and we

What I want you to finally understand,
not with your mind alone,
but with the blood flowing through your veins,
is that YOU are not the same as everyone around you.
As long as you’re playing by their rules,
even when their rules lead to socially approved success,
you are keeping yourself out of your true game.

And Darling,
is nothing short of

The challenge comes from your socialised thinking that has you convinced that for you to be a valuable asset in this world,
you have to do it the way everyone else is.
You have to finish school,
get the degrees,
commit to a career,
outworking everyone else to be recognised as a leader in your field,
and then give your best years to climbing that ladder,
popping out some babes along the way,
keeping your man happy,
make sure your tits don’t sag too much,
that your body stays firm and lean,
and try not to loose your shit in public okay?

Sounds funny,
yet this is exactly what’s going on.
I should know – I fell for that too 😉

And fell
and fell
and fell
until I fell so far down that I could no longer see a way out.

I got so disconnected from my body
that I lost all sensation from my shoulders to my knees,
You could touch me,
but unless I saw your hand,
I wouldn’t even know.
Exhausted beyond human capacity,
I shut down
to shut out the pain,
so my mind could somehow cope with getting up in the morning.

I got so disconnected from my soul
that I would go throughout my day
with no inclination of what I was FEELING.
I completely rejected my emotions as a sign of weakness
and in the process
I became another Stepford Wife.
Obedient and pleasing

I got so disconnected from my heart
my true desires
as a woman
as an artist
as a creative genius
that if you asked me what I truly wanted
I would simply recite the next set of goals that I had to achieve
thinking that if only I could reach enough goals
I would finally feel
satisfied and fulfilled and happy!

I honestly could not remember what the fuck happy felt like.

The secret knowing of this level of misery
scared the bejesus out of me.
My solution was to stay so busy,
so ‘in control’ of every little aspect of life,
that I wouldn’t have time to face the root of the problem.
I simply didn’t believe I would survive the enormity of my
I was terrified that if I slowed down even for a nano-second
the universe would come crashing down on me.

Guess what?
The universe is still operating perfectly
even as I got off the merry-go-round of insanity.

What I learned in the process is this:

1. This is MY life to create as I see fit and quite frankly the ONLY thing that truly matters, is that I live in a way that has me increase my well-being, my joy, my lifegasms.

Anyone who wants to sit and criticise me for my choices because it doesn’t fit into their little box of what a woman my age should be doing, should be saying, should look like, can kiss my sweet round little toe.I’m fucking worthy!

2. I’m fucking worthy!

I have nothing to apologise for. Nothing to prove. Nobody to impress.
The simple fact that I’m alive means I can be, do and have ANYTHING I desire with ZERO self-sacrifice.
In fact, it’s the other way around!
For me to RECEIVE, I have to allow myself to become MORE.
Isn’t that the best news ever???

3. With deep love and appreciation of everyone else, fuck ’em.

We’re so conditioned to think that we’re the source of happiness of others and this LIE is what keeps majority of people stuck in a crazy loop of self-destruction.
Their feelings of joy is THEIR responsibility and quite frankly, if they’re too fucking lazy to sort out the stories in their heads, it’s not my problem.
Does this make me selfish? Yup.
Does this make me an unsympathetic bitch? Yup.
Does this means I deeply respect the immense power of choice inside every human? You bet your sexy arse it does.

are you deeply and completely HAPPY?
Are you waking in the still of morn before the rest of the world has their alarms pull them from exhaustion to exhaustion,
feeling deeply satisfied and proud and delightfully anticipative of the day ahead?
Are you living life on your terms, from a space of deep connection with your body, your heart, using the power of your mind to ensure energetic alignment so that you increase your well-being?

If you’re not,
why not?
Who are you trying to impress?
Who are you trying to prove wrong?
Who are you desperately seeking recognition from?

Do you see the insanity of living from this space?
Are you ready to release this shit?
Will you be one of the very few
reclaiming themselves
and from a space of radical and unconditional self-acceptance, self-appreciation and self-love


For death is inevitable,
but until you exhale your final breath,
thrive is a choice available to you.

Live with honour,


Anel is the Instigator of a Thrive Evolution for Alpha Females.

Her work is aimed at empowering women to trust themselves and their intuition, reclaiming their authentic voices, and creating a life they’re madly in love with.

Through enhanced self-love, self-worth and self-confidence they know the satisfaction and pride of a woman who lives unapologetically aligned with her purpose.

Those ready to step up and receive support on their journey are invited to connect through a potential partnership consultation.

✔︎ For more pockets for introspection follow her here ☛ Anel Bester

✔︎ To learn more about her thrive evolution visit here ☛

✔︎ For video content subscribe here ☛  Home of the Alpha Females