You don’t CHOOSE the pack, the pack calls you…

At times I still forget just how deep the tribal consciousness of belonging goes, especially in the female community.

This was made abundantly clear in a client conversation around her resistance to the pack,
when she belongs to plenty of groups where it’s easy for her to be in.

Where to begin…

Okay I’m sweating,
which means,
I’m about to tweeze some fanny hairs.

Fuck it,
bitches will bitch,
and alphas will rise.

Groups – the spaces where tribes convene within the parameters of unspoken rules.

There are groups where you’re expected to show up as a victim : moaning and bitching all motherfucking day long about how hard life is, what a dick your man is, how your hormones are raging out of control, your bulge won’t budge, blah blah blah. It’s the function of the group to ‘help’ these victims by smothering them with ‘understanding’ aka sympathy, information and advise. What’s fascinating is that people are in here for fucking YEARS with the same shit, it just wears a different skirt from one year to the next. Members are addicted to drama and suffering, like heroine addicts who get their kicks in a socially approved way.

There are groups where you’re expected to show only your shiny self: business women showing up with false bravado, focused on results, achievements, it’s clinical and it’s clean. This is the space where you celebrate each other and keep those pretty masks in place so that everyone can feel good. They are fun to be in and have a positive vibration.

There are groups where the only real purpose is to piss away time through mindless and substance-less content, funny cat videos, memes and chit chat with those who are bored and frustrated with life and they simply don’t want to deal with the shit storm they’re creating around them, so let’s all pretend that laughter heals everything.

If you dare break the rules, if you dare show up in a way that goes against the grain, if you say something that has someone sit up and pay attention to their bullshit, you are immediately turned on by the group and they will push you the fuck out unless you apologise and make nice so that harmony can be restored.

It’s the fear of abandonment and exclusion that keeps you in your place, that has you swallow your truth which would be confronting and actually bring about change.
It ensures predictability, giving members a false sense of safety, even though you’re tippy toeing around in fear because heaven forbid you should break a rule and be scolded in the lime-light and humiliated like a little school-girl.

oh hunny,
they are a whole other ball-game.

First off,
nobody WANTS to go belong to a pack.

It’s the most uncomfortable place on the face of the earth.
It’s the most intimidating, scary space to enter and all who do, tremble in fear and doubt of not being enough,
not being good enough.
THIS is the first hurdle to overcome.
You have to find the brass ovaries, the audacity, to CLAIM yourself worthy and step out of the shadows.

The pack is not about friendship or feeling good about yourself,
it’s for those committed to mastery and creating masterpieces.

The pack is built on honour, integrity, truth, trust and love.

This is where purpose-driven Alphas come together
to spar
to train
to practice
to bleed
to vomit
to shake
to rage
to do whatever the fuck they need to do
to prepare for their personal wars against the cult of mediocrity
and become

Pretence will not work in this space
as every single one of your triggers will be,
and you will be expected to deal with it
because nobody, except for YOU, is responsible for your well-being which means nobody is going to apologise and make you feel better.

Truth is spoken
from a space of unconditional love and respect.
And truth will bring to the surface
all the areas in your life
where you’ve been lying to yourself.
It will stink,
you will feel like shit,
and it will be up to you to purge that through fire
so that
you can walk with conviction
and become unshakeable
in your world.

All your fears will be exposed,
that has you playing in the realm of average,
and nobody is going to hold your hand
whilst you fight those demons
so that
you can claim your power
unleashing your genius.

So why the hell would anyone choose to belong to the pack?

Because your pack
your family.

Not the dysfunctional modern institution most of us were raised in.

True family.
The place where you become your BEST version self
knowing that no matter what
they will not desert you.

The only way to leave the pack
is through YOUR choice to stay behind
by NOT doing the work
by NOT showing up
because you don’t want an extraordinary life after all
and mediocrity feels easier,
so you choose ease
above greatness.

Other than that,
the pack
is solid
and you know
that when the shit hits the fan
they have your back.


Your pack,
will stand by your side,
they will move mountains with you,
they will bring to you all the energy required
to get you through the raging storms.

is the power of the pack.

You have no fucking clue
until you’ve entered,
which few will.

For everyone wants to be part of the event as a spectator,
everyone loves watching the unfolding of greatness
on a TV screen
with carefully chosen music to emulate some emotions,
but very few
are willing to take the journey
which brings out your worst
so you can mould your best
because it is raw,
it hurts like a mofo,
it has you crying ugly,
it has you free-falling out of control,
it has you show your underbelly whilst pleading for mercy.

This is why nobody chooses the pack,
that would just be insane
(okay okay so I now, you’re crazy AF).
The pack calls you
and those with courage
answers the call
as it accentuates the pounding beat of your heart
and you feel fully


Live with honour,