What will it take for you to get off the struggle-wagon?

I understand that this message will resonate with very few.
Most will be utterly disgusted by the potential thought of joyous success.
Others will be outraged by my audacity to hold up the mirror and putting the power right back into their hands.
Others still will throw insults like hot potatoes, freaking the fuck out as their so-called ‘identity’ is threatened.

That’s okay,
I’m not speaking to them,
instead I’m speaking to you Darling.

The biggest conundrum I see my clients struggle with
is the immense guilt and shame they experience
once they’ve connected to the simplicity of life
and everything just flows,
feeling so easy
it’s almost laughable.

And yes,
they laugh a lot,
once we’ve moved past the curses and tears.

At first they put it down to a fluke,
you know,
random luck.
Except it happens again and again!

Everything they desire starts appearing in their experience and it’s never when they push and struggle,
but whilst distracted from their old stories through dance and orgasms and riding bikes and chasing ducks and whatever is FUN for them.

They’ll get on a call,
sharing all the magical synchronicities and opportunities that ‘randomly’ popped up,
and then the inevitable statement:
“It’s not supposed to be this easy!”

In this exact moment I see the shadow pass over,
and I know,
I know because I’ve experienced it myself,
the instance guilt is rearing her dark little head.

If not nipped in the butt,
this inevitably leads to self-sabotaging behaviour
so that she can return to the status quo
merrily singing on the bandwagon of struggle and misery.

What a crazy society we have created Sunshine…

I get it,
we seem to have put struggle and hardship on a pedestal to be admired and applauded.
She who endures the most,
she who has it the hardest,
is the most deserving.

It’s as though we’re considered boring, bland, unworthy, if we choose ease.
And I’m not saying that we’ve not had it hard as nails getting to this point in time.
our battle scars criss-cross every part of our bodies, minds, and hearts.
I’m not discounting this in the least.
And I get that sharing our stories is instrumental in connecting with others who are still in a state of war.
It makes us relatable.

I get all of this.

But I also want to put this into perspective for you today Alpha.

This thing we call life,
is nothing more than a game,
an adventure,
that you create through your decisions.

I’m #sorrynotsorry to tell you but I believe in


You’re not a pawn on the chessboard of the gods,
here to be moved about by a giant hand in the sky.

that hand,
is constantly poised to deliver to you all that you wish and desire.
Paying attention to your thoughts,
it brings evidence all day ever day
to support the story you’re telling silently,
and sometimes not so silently.

There’s NO judgement of good or bad thoughts.
You think,
hand delivers.

So if you’re thinking that this is soooooo fucking hard,
that you have to be exhausted to receive crumbs,
that’s what you will get.

If you’re thinking that this is so much fun you can hardly contain your excitement,
jumping up and down like a 5 year old at the fair,
then that’s what you will get.

It’s all a choice.

before you say
“But Anel, you’re always taking action.
You’re always writing and working and creating.
Doesn’t this contradict what you’re saying?”

Well, no.
Because writing and working and creating is FUN for me!
It’s FUN for all Alphas.

We THRIVE in taking action,
it’s how we roll,
how we rock,
how we play.

Sitting on the beach,
drunk on cocktails,
which is apparently the ultimate dream of the little people,
for us.

The difference is that we GET to take action
because we WANT to take action,
not because we think we HAVE to take action.

We take action in the energy of delight and excitement and joy,
we can’t wait to see what the results are going to be,
not attached to the outcome,
which means we really can’t get it wrong,
for even if the outcome is not as anticipated
we simply take more action and on and on it goes.

For us,
this is what really makes life interesting and exceptionally lifegasmic.

How do you slowly kill an Alpha?

Tell her to go sit on her arse all day.
Tell her to go take hour long baths every day.
Tell her to let go of her grande vision and settle.
Tell her to slow down,
tone it down.

And it saddens me to no end!

I meet so many Alpha Females,
drained and grey and BLEEDING ENERGY TO DEATH!

I see them LIGHT UP when I connect them to their vision,
when I hold a space for them to go




Renewed life flowing into their washed out cheeks.
They’re literally arse-dancing in their chairs.
And then…
They go home and their enthusiasm terrifies the little people who immediately douse them with ‘reality’ talk.

She puts that leash back on,
hands it to her keepers,
to be led like a domesticated dog to her grave,
broken in once more.

Free will Baby.

I don’t do the convincing sales talk with them.
I don’t tell them they’re making a ‘mistake’.
There are no mistakes made.
They choose.
The Universe delivers.

Here’s what I want you to remember today Alpha:
YOU are the CREATOR of your experience.
Nobody and nothing else.
YOU get to CHOOSE how you’re going to experience life.
You can stay in the ‘popular’ group of struggle and misery and addiction and excistence and self-sacrifice and codependency.
You can walk the hell away from the masses to where you can unleash your free wild spirit that’s been starving for playful creation and abundance and thrive!

Whichever path you choose,
you will still end up dying one day.

But one path will have you exhale your last breath in relief and gratitude that the torture is finally coming to an end,
the other path will have you exhale in deep satisfaction with excitement at the prospect that you just might get to do this all again.

Live with honour,


Anel is the Instigator of a Thrive Evolution for Alpha Females.

Her work is aimed at empowering women to trust themselves and their intuition, reclaiming their authentic voices, and creating a life they’re madly in love with.

Through enhanced self-love, self-worth and self-confidence they know the satisfaction and pride of a woman who lives unapologetically aligned with her purpose.

Those ready to step up and receive support on their journey are invited to connect through a potential partnership consultation.

✔︎ For more pockets for introspection follow her here ☛ Anel Bester

✔︎ To learn more about her thrive evolution visit here ☛  https://anelbester.com

✔︎ For video content subscribe here ☛  Home of the Alpha Females