I’m not referring to wickedly bad,
as we both know
soooooo good 😉
I’m talking about screwing you over bad.
The way so many of our socialised habits and behaviours are.
All those little habits that you’ve prided yourself on as a high achiever.
Your ability to organise everything into neat and tidy categories even though you know that you’re never going to actually DO anything with all the content you’re spending HOURS curating.
Your ability to set the BIG goal and create the exact plan and taking the written down action every day regardless of your spiritual, mental, physical or emotional state on the day, leaving a wake of internal destruction that’s going to bite you in the arse for years to come, but to hell with it, you’re tough as nails.
Your ability to keep your composure at all times even though your truth is burning you up on the inside and your Soul is raging against the confinements of your good manners as appearances matter more than authenticity.
Your discipline to sit your sweet self down and do the things they told you to do even when the boredom of it all has you craving an enema just to feel a little less bloated with ordinary.
Your tenacity to stay in the toxic relationship because you have a point to prove, that you are stronger, that nothing will break you, that you can make this work, even though the codependency is slowly poisoning everything that made you glow, becoming dull, lack-lustre, dead-pan eyes looking out at the world but not to worry, you can add another layer of Lancome and nobody will see the shame rotting your insides.
For this ‘strength’ of being THAT woman,
is exactly what’s keeping you apart from your genius,
apart from your muse,
apart from your thrive.
Worst of all,
this habit of being organised, disciplined to a fault, composed and oh so proper
is nothing more than a well-manicured mask to hide the fact that you’re scared to death of
your true self onto the world of the mundane
as it will actually have people sit up and pay attention to what you have to say,
leaving them gasping at the beauty of your audacity,
FEELING your vibration and allowing it to trigger or inspire them,
in the process
acknowledging the truth that YOU matter,
YOU are more than enough without you needing to add anything,
YOU are spectacularly important in the unfurling of humanity’s future,
Not your calendar.
Not your plan.
Not your list.
Not your title.
Not your certificates.
Not your well-polished script that you’ve rehearsed a thousand times.
Not the size of your booty.
Not the size of your online following.
Not your brand.
None of that shit matters testicles
if they become your prison of propriety.
listen to me now.
YOU ARE FUCKING PHENOMANEL
and if you can just let go of your insane desire to be in control all the time,
allowing yourself to release into all that is swirling inside of you,
trusting that what is inside is GOOD and GOOD FOR YOU,
you will find yourself on a brand new journey
where love, truth, faith, excellence, adventure, honour, integrity and passion
becomes your daily expectation and you ALWAYS get what you expect as you’re unavailable for anything less.
Is this choice void of fear?
Do you become fearless?
Do you become invinsible where you never ever fall on your face?
Do you succeed every single step of the way?
Choosing this path means that you become COURAGEOUS.
Choosing this path means you become a resilient badass falling flat on your face again and again;
sometimes you lie down there and you let the screams of frustration rip apart the particles of silence,
sometimes you find yourself on the floor again and tears of pain saturate the soil which Mother Earth FEELS and she brings you healing, love and support,
sometimes you taste the blood on your cut lip and you simply start laughing like the loon you are.
Choosing this path means you fail spectacularly, you fail often, and you celebrate your failures alongside your successes.
Choosing this path means you stop tippy-toeing your way to your grave
and you start thriving
the way life was created for us to experience
before you got so obsessed with appearances and belonging and ‘good habits’.
Choosing this path means that every day you live as though it is your first with no extra baggage to slog around
and as though it is your last leaving not an ounce of yourself unexpressed or unexperienced.
THIS is the path of the Alpha.
Understanding that they will call you even crazier for the masses have forgotten what LIVING looks and feels like,
and anything that they don’t understand,
and anything they’re afraid of,
they call crazy.
Are you going to stay up there
or are you going to dive into the rabbits’ hole?
We truly ARE all crazy down here.
Death is inevitable and you can absolutely choose to exist until your last breath knowing that you will look like a Barbie doll in her plastic box
you can choose to thrive and get to your end with scrapes, scars, fabulous adventures, passion and a still-throbbing vajayjay, laughing your arse off and telling the Universe
Live with honour,