‘Why the hell did I just create this pile of shit?’

Sometimes I look at the unfolding of my life,

the current events,

people,

circumstances,

and I’m a little dumbfounded.

I can’t help but shake my head,

a silent ‘what the fuck’ escaping my lips.

It used to be so easy to feel helpless in these times.

I could almost miss those days of ignorance.

When I thought I was simply a pawn on someone else’s board.

Believing that I’m being moved around by a force unseen.

All the time passively accepting my fate.

It used to be so easy to blame others decisions and behaviours,

for the results in my life.

Blame is such a potent card of cowardice to play.

Best of all – it is socially acceptable.

Or my other personal favourite –

martyrdom.

Sacrificing my dreams, my desires, my happiness,

for the greater good.

Except, my soul had other plans for me in this life.

Clever little bitch decided that this time around,

I would wake the fuck up,

to the truth

of personal responsibility.

To the fact that I am the creator of EVERYTHING in my life.

Even the assholes.

So that I may constantly drop in, and reconnect to my desires.

That which light me UP!

That which has me dance with delight regardless of the sideways glances.

And yes,

every now and again I get lulled into complacency.

I forget to stay connected.

I get caught up in my ego bullshit.

And then life lovingly has the creeps crawl out of the underground.

Draining me with their insanity / stupidity.

Until I finally wake up, look up,

shaking my head,

‘what the fuck?’

I’ve learned that during times of interesting contrast,

we have choices:

We can stay sitting down,

feeling sorry for ourselves,

crying to all who will listen,

how hard it is,

how unfair,

how we just don’t know what to do,

because it’s not us,

it’s them,

those fuckers,

and we can become the helpless little victim that all love to console.

It works like a charm Darling!

I’m not even kidding.

Why do you think social media is overflowing with pity-parties?

But there’s another choice available to us.

We can choose to take complete responsibility for EVERYTHING in our lives,

grow a pair of balls,

swallow a good dollop of humour,

and ask ourselves,

‘why the hell did I just create this pile of shit?’

Be prepared to go deep,

to be uncomfortable,

to cry a little,

to curse a lot,

and to ultimately laugh with delight at what a dumb-ass you can be at times.

Not paying attention to when we go off track.

Not being conscious of what we’re saying,

and believe me,

we ALWAYS get what we ask for.

Except we can be a little lazy with our words,

and give incomplete instructions to the Universe of what we want.

Expecting our higher selves to fill in the blanks.

Well,

she does.

And she’s got a warped sense of humour.

I’ve come to the understanding that the Universe will give you exactly what you need to remember that you have unlimited power within you.

And the way to do that,

is by providing enough contrast for you to finally become specific.

For me personally,

and for a lot of people I’m meeting at this time,

it’s about finding the courage to speak our truth.

To be selfish in our mission to becoming our best versions self.

Unavailable for distraction.

Unavailable for settling.

Unavailable for rescuing others.

I believe that this is an era of the return to SELF.

You might call me disloyal.

Selfish.

Insensitive to the needs of others.

I call myself loving.

I’ve simply learned that the social structure and system of generations past,

no longer serves us.

It has made most soft,

like putty,

to be moulded by those in egotistical power.

It has stripped away the creative power that lies within.

It has replaced love with codependency.

It has duped us into believing that we need others for us to be whole and complete.

I’m choosing differently.

I’m choosing to be the change I desire to see in the world for my boys.

I’m choosing to have the bus stop with me instead of pissing away my potential and then telling my kids they have to do better.

I’m choosing to become the most beautiful, powerful, connected version of myself and sharing me with those who do the same.

I’m choosing to thrive.

For me.

Because ultimately I am the only person who will be with me from birth to death.

Which is why I’m choosing to take full responsibility for my life,

and drop into appreciation for the roles others play on my board.

Everything matters.

Everything is created by you.

It’s time you take responsibility for that Darling.

Not because you want to feel bad about yourself – unless of course that brings you a sense of warped satisfaction.

Personally, I don’t find pleasure in self-flagellation.

It’s time to figure out why you’re creating the unpleasant experiences,

so you can get back on track,

to fulfilling your deepest desires.

Or not.

Only death is inevitable.

Thriving is always a choice available to the brave.

With deep love and appreciation,

Anel.

PS:  Mindset, Business & Money is for those who are ready to take full responsibility for their success.

Those entrepreneurs who will no longer tolerate feeling like a failure, a victim to the current economic conditions.

Those who are done treating their business like a hobby.

Those who are done saying ‘I would love to but I can’t afford it’.

Zero excuses.

Zero pity-parties.

Focus, clarity, grit, aligned action, results.

Pre-course work is starting this week.

Hesitation leads to devastation.

Stop saying I will do it next time – there is only this time.