Will all the lies and excuses please line up?

Oooooh,
that was so close.

Slippy slidey
all the way down
thinking it’s all whee and whoo
and meanwhile, back at the ranch,
you’ve just gone down the same old hole
of lies and excuses.

I know
I know

Sneaky
sneaky
little
bastards.

Here’s the thing Sugar
as a MASTER trickster of myself,
I am also a MASTER bullshit detector
and I will always slay those excuses with zero mercy.

For years
I held myself under
except
I would NEVER admit that I was doing it out of fear
of showing you just how crazy and weird I truly am.
I am NOT the good little Afrikaans girl my sperm donor tried to beat into my body through my arse.

Instead of owning up that I am more powerful, more willful than ANYONE OR ANYTHING,
I would blame every single person and condition
for the fact that
I
Me
Myself
was not showing the fuck up
for
I
Me
Myself.

And in the process
I was not showing up for you, my boys or anyone else.

Disgusting.

Which is why I now stand guard,
sniffing out my triggers
as I did yesterday.
Instead of sweeping them under the rug
I switched off my phone
sat my sweet self down
and ripped those lies out by their roots
like an inexperienced beautician
giving you a brazillian wax,
excruciatingly painful for but a moment,
the sting lasting a little longer than you would wish,
and then
hmmmmmmmm, well you know…

Personally
I don’t care about the fact that you lie to just about every single person
just about every single day

as this is simply the culture we’ve chosen for this time.

We even joke about it,
putting those who we say lies the best
in power of our world, our countries, our laws, our rules, our abundance or lack thereof.

Except,
the joke is on us.

We’ve made living out of integrity, honourable.
Convincing ourselves
that this is the only way to
‘support’
everyone else
as they say the truth hurts
and if someone has an ouchie
it will justify them drugging themselves out of consciousness
and we’ll be to blame
because we spoke the truth and they didn’t want to deal.

Well,
it only hurts until you stop lying to yourself.

Then it sets you free
from all your
self-imposed
limitations and misery.

Please stop thinking you’re excempt.
As long as you’re alive,
as long as you’re committed to growth,
this is an internal war you will fight
every
single
day.

For we’ve conditioned ourselves to avoid pain,
and let me tell you Darling,
there’s no greater pain than self-abandonment
and this is EXACTLY what you’re doing
each and every time
you dim your greatness, don’t create your art, whore out your value, swallow your truth or dress it all frilled up and pretty so that it will sound acceptable to the old girls club.

In an attempt to shift the blame
to make it a little easier on ourselves
we find
shields
aka excuses
aka lies.

Oh I can’t possibly become seriously successful,
it will make my man feel bad for his personal frugal choices
and he won’t like me anymore
so I’m just going to self-sabotage every step of the way.

Oh I can’t possibly share my story,
it will expose others for their poor choices
and it will expose me for my fear-laced choices
and my children, my parents, my friends, my ex,
will be hurt in the process
so I’m just going to keep quiet and let this cycle of abuse spill over to the next generation.

Oh I can’t possibly be honest with my partner
or myself
and admit that I don’t love him
for if I did
I would tell him the truth
that he’s stopped lighting my fire in any way years ago
slipping into the role of my daddy
instead of my king
so I’m just going to whisper another lie for another day and stay in my bubble of hypocricy for another year.

Don’t be too hard on yourself either
for it will simply have you pulling that blanket of shame over your head
and you will go further down the slug hole
which is stupid.

Instead,
today I invite you to woman up
and come clean with yourself
by standing in front of the mirror
and calling yourself out
as a liar
and choose
differently
moving forward.

If this is something you desire true support in
as quite frankly,
you’re vibrating on the frequency of lies
and untill you allow yourself to be in the environment of truth
you’ll simply keep the same tone as there will be no dissonance to make you pay attention
message me at anel@anelbester.com

The work I do with women
is an uprooting of their foundations built on social conditioning which is infused with lies and fear
and replacing it with a rock solid foundation of truth
on which to build their empires of impact
and bring generational healing as they change the trajectory of their lineage.

THIS is what it means to be an Alpha Female – the energetic vibration of truth.

Death might be inevitable Darling,
but will you choose to thrive in love?

Live with honour,
Anel.